£100 for xmas dinner

[disneydatknee]

We went to sis inlayws for xmas dinner this year and shes charging £100 per family. No alcohol was provided, we had to bring our own. Pud was brought by another family member. All her veg was free from a local charity for food waste. So she only paid for meat which I ate about half a palmful of beef of. My family consists of 2 adults and 2 children that ate fuck all. Aibu to say I'm not fucking paying it? No back story or drip feed. This is it!

I would pay 30 knocking 20 quid off for alcohol and pudding. The woman is shamelss. I would not be going round there again

Ask where she managed to find unicorn meat at this time of year!!!

I would pay the £50 that was originally agreed and then never go to her house again.

I am astonished that anyone would charge for Christmas dinner. Bringing a dish, coordinating so everyone brings something different, is normal.

Your ILs are very strange, all of them. If they can't afford to host Christmas, then don't host.

I was more than happy to chip in for Christmas dinner at my sister's because I didn't think it was fair she shouldered the financial burden. It depends on everyone's circumstances, if hosting will put people under strain financially but the family/ friends want to get together then it is only fair to contribute.

£100 is taking the piss though, and no way would I be paying it.

Unless there's a reason why everybody always descends upon this relative for Christmas dinner, I don't understand charging. If, as seems to happen in many families, Christmas hosting duties rotate from year to year, surely the cost even out over time? It's different if there's a good reason for it to always fall into the same person - my sibling usually hosts the big family get togethers, as they have the space to accommodate the number of people. But then, we always share the costs / preparation etc. We discuss food, drink, costs etc beforehand and ensure that everything is shared fairly. Because we are aware that they always bear the cost of 'sundries' (gas/electricity /cleaning up afterwards etc) we usually pay a little more to allow for that. My sibling definitely does not make a profit on it.
FWIW, I had different groups of guests in Christmas Day and Boxing Day this year. The total cost of our meals comes in at just over £11 per head. And the only thing I didn't have to pay for was the champagne as that was a gift from a friend for a favour I did them. Our food was all Finest / Taste the Difference, so not the cheapest available.
I think your SIL is taking the Mickey, OP. I would definitely knock off something from the original ist for the lack of drinks. And I wouldn't accept future invitations.

No bloody way. I gave my sister 200 as we stayed almost a week (4 of us) and I drank shit loads of wine. We also had fireworks and amazing food.

I catered for 7 people, food and cheap fizzy, wine etc cost me £250, sent guests home with leftovers, we dont charge guests and I host every year

Wow that's more expensive than my local restaurant. You can come to us next year for that and it will include gifts for you all and your tea 😂.
Don't pay it she being a very CF unless obviously she can provide an itemised bill showing where all the £500 has been spent on you all .

Wow! Don't pay and don't go again!

What did they cook? Roast swan & Pterodactyl?

Cheeky fuckers

Send her a pack of cooked beef. That's apparently all she provided you with from her own pocket!

I’d have no intention of paying but I’d be inclined to want to Toy with her first “pls provide receipts for the unexpected rise in costs”

I don't understand why you went

Are you sure you aren't underestimating the cost of what was provided? My shopping bill for Christmas day and Boxing day was just over 400 pounds.

Beef - what cut was it? Was it fresh from a farm or butcher's, frozen from Iceland, Aberdeen Angus?

Did you have?:
Crackers
A starter
Beef
Any other meat with it?
Yorkshire pudding
Stuffing
Gravy
Bacon-wrapped chipolatas
Horseradish sauce
Mustard
Cranberry sauce
Roast parsnips
Carrots
Sprouts
Chestnuts
Roast potatoes
Creamed or other potatoes
Goose fat
Cheeses and biscuits for cheese
After dinner mints
Chocolates
Nuts
Dates
Figs

Did other relatives take everything for the dessert including accompaniments like custard, ice cream, Brandy sauce?

What did you actually drink?

Did you stay and have snacks for tea? The kids didn't have chocolates or sweets? No pork pies, quiches, salads, sandwiches at all? Mince pies?

It is surprising how much things add up to. My Christmas puddings were 12 pounds each and I bought 3 of them. When you add in the accompaniments it soon adds up. Meats cost me about 100 pounds.

I must admit that I wouldn't dream of charging my family for hosting but realise others do. If I had agreed to pay 50 pounds for the family, I'd pay that (not 100) and I would have a word with SIL about changing the goalposts.

We ate Christmas dinner out. 4 of us incl kids (who didn't want to eat anything) which was £90 excl drinks.

OP, if your hands wants to wash his hands of her, then why are you arguing with that?! Don't even pay £50.

Ask for an itemised bill. If you are expected to pay 100 pounds You are entitled to know what you are. Then report back to the MN jury

NameChangeNugget ha! That made my day! 😂

Bloody hell thats ridiculous!!

Ok we didn't have quite as many people, but we catered for 8 ( 6 adults and two teenage boys!) and spent £130 including the turkey, two different puddings, beer and a bottle of wine!!

@disneydatknee

"I have not hosted xmas yet. But when I do, I wouldn't dream of asking for money for xmas dinner, puds, alcohol or otherwise."
@mathanxiety
There's nothing wrong with people contributing, otherwise some families could never afford to meet up.

We split the cost in my family. I took the wine and decent (M&S) deserts for everyone. My Sister, who can’t drink, did some ferrying about. A family member even offered her Healthy Start Vouchers (we didn't take them, but she did cleaning and shopping for the host).

Do you think lower income families should all sit in isolation?

OP, work out what you ate and what it would have cost to cook/serve etc and give that.

How odd. I wouldn't dream of asking for money to feed family and friends. Is she particularly hard up? How many people were at the dinner? It sounds as though you were all subsidising her Christmas Dinner. Next year eat at home or go out to a real restaurant

She wants you to subsidise for her greedy in laws. She's not hosting a family Christmas, she's running an unregistered pop up restaurant from her home. I'd report her to the council and HMRC because she's not got licences, hygiene cert or paying tax on her profit.