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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To find new year's eve abit depressing

205 replies

londongirl86 · 30/12/2019 15:48

I am probably alone in this. I don't blame anyone for having an amazing night out or for having a party at new year's. I don't mind that. It's great if you can! It's just new year's right from being a kid has seemed boring and depressing for me lol. My parents did drink and have a few people over as a child. It was fun playing with my cousin's. But I do remember trying to hide at midnight so Drunk adults didn't kiss me haha. I sometimes remember feeling super tired and wanting to go to sleep. As an adult I've not done the parties since 19/20. Due to work and then having my babies.

Also I don't know why but it gives me this feeling of the end in a negative way. The whole goodbye 2019. New starts. Yes people have bad years. But there's plenty of good things I don't want to shut the door on this year. If that makes sense. Then new year's Day just feels quiet and boring. Plus my partner's back at work on the 2nd of January. So it feels like it's also the end of our family time. It also is like a goodbye to christmas. Christmas went so fast this year. It was lovely and we've been in a state of late nights, junk food and lots of Tele. I have loved it. I don't want it to end lol.

I'm not a misery. I'm not bothered that people have fun. I just can't get into new year's and never have been able to x

OP posts:
HeIenaDove · 30/12/2019 20:18

Funny but poignant New Years Eve themed episode of Shelley from New Years Eve 1990. Episode is called Forward To The Past. Covers issues still relevant to today.

SnorkMaiden81 · 30/12/2019 20:36

@keepingbees yes exactly that. But smudging me. Smile

Mummaofmytribe · 30/12/2019 20:37

londongirl86thanks for your kindness. That message is better than a "Happy New Year" in every way. Much appreciated.

SnorkMaiden81 · 30/12/2019 20:37

@keepingbees although it smells slightly like stuffing. So I do tend to emerge from my bath smelling a bit like a roast chicken.

That's fine, I love roast chicken.

colouringinpro · 30/12/2019 21:00

Mumma ❤ sending sympathy. my past decade has been similarly awful.

JaceLancs · 30/12/2019 21:04

Once I decided to spend NYE quietly it’s been fine
DP and I go over to close friends, eat, drink and watch tv, stay night then have a long lie in followed by fab breakfast and a walk in the local countryside
I take food and drinks in plenty but nothing that takes a big effort to prepare
As my Dad died recently I will get home New Year’s Day early enough to take DM out for a meal with my adult DC

redcarbluecar · 30/12/2019 21:06

I find it a bit of a pain; it's not my favourite night of the year. Go easy on yourself.

lilgreen · 30/12/2019 21:08

@Youvegotafriendinme I lost my DM 5 years ago now. The first 3 were like wading through treacle, living but not feeling in some ways. Just wanted to say, time does make it easier.Flowers

leli · 30/12/2019 21:13

I hate NYE but my DH is massively sentimental and extrovert. I'm an introvert who'd prefer to have a country walk then home to a quiet house and some classical music and a toast of champagne just with him. I've learned to play along though because otherwise he thinks I'm weird. I couldn't do some huge bash but we are having a quiet dinner with friends. A lot of people struggle with both Xmas and NYE - and the dark - and the mad unnecessary expense - and the damn food and drink - and somehow never a moment to rest if you're a woman - my list goes on.

ManonBlackbeak · 30/12/2019 21:15

YANBU. I hate it, have always hated. It makes me feel sad and has done since I was child, so definitely not an age thing either. Actually the best NYE's Ive ever had were the ones spent at home doing sod all, which is what I intend to do tomorrow.

GreyGardens88 · 30/12/2019 21:19

How do you infuse a bath with sage?

Christmaspug · 30/12/2019 21:32

Thanks for posting,it’s nice to know I’m not alone with the same feelings

keepingbees · 30/12/2019 22:10

@SnorkMaiden81 thanks for replying, I need me some of that! If it works it'll be worth smelling like a roast chicken Grin

letsdolunch321 · 30/12/2019 22:13

I used to do bar work locally on NYE.

Nowadays, I will be having dinner out, home by 8pm, bed by 10.30-11pm. How times have changed!!

It is just another day

percheron67 · 30/12/2019 22:16

I don't enjoy it either. My Pa used to avoid NYE gatherings as he said he couldn't stand people with "beery good humour"! I feel the same.

PumpkinPie2016 · 30/12/2019 22:17

I've never liked it either. As a child, my parents would generally invite some friends round nothing big and the friends are perfectly nice people but I just never really got it! Often, as a teenager, I'd just sneak off to bed to read or watch TV in my room.

As an adult, I still don't like it - have never done nights out on NYE and quite often, I don't even see it in.

malificent7 · 30/12/2019 22:24

Yanbu...too much pressure to make a change. However, will be drinking prosecco and trying to loose weight like the rest of the planet.

eggandonion · 30/12/2019 22:25

I find it disturbing, the diary is pretty empty at the minute. It is weeks to payday, the credit bill is high, the fuel bills are going to be big, Easter is fairly late. I think the time drags until Pancake Day!
Last year we had a family wedding to look forward to, sadly we had a funeral the following month. I suppose it's the fear of the unknown events which will fill the diary dates...

Original poster
londongirl86 · 30/12/2019 22:32

It's amazing to see other people don't enjoy it. It definitely stems from being a kid with me. The late night, the drunk soppy adults, the next day being boring and quiet. The end of Christmas.

So many people struggling with it because of the emotions. Also it's funny how a firework can make you think of someone no longer here! Fireworks have always made me feel sad. I didn't like fireworks as a child. I take my kids to see them though but don't particularly care for them.

My plan is film with the kids and partner (maybe a pizza) then news years Day I'm going to cook another christmas dinner and go for a walk in the woods. I won't be making it about a new start but trying to focus on it being about my kids. Soon be back doing school runs Xmas Angry

Hopefully lots of us feel a little better knowing it affects us all in the same ways.

OP posts:
Dollymixture22 · 30/12/2019 22:47

I used to absolutely hate it in my teens and twenties. The pressure to have plans, the expense of it all. The hassle over getting home.

About ten years ago I gave myself permission to say home and I bloody love it. I stock up on good food, watch a move and have some champagne. All in my jammies.

This year I am doing a parkrun on New Year’s Day. So no late night for me, might not even see midnight😊

AdaFromYorkshire · 30/12/2019 23:02

It's the fireworks which annoy me. There's absolutely no need for them. I'm fairly ambivalent about 2020, but won't be staying up to see it in.

QuietCrotchgoblins · 30/12/2019 23:08

I love NYE! I've never been properly our on the town on nye but to loads of fun house parties and also quiet nights with family.

There is a definitely mix of melancholy as the bells ring and auld lang sang makes me feel nostalgic even if I hear it in the middle of the year. It's a time to reflect on the year past, giving thanks for the good and acknowledging the bad. I almost feel it's a time of rememberence for those who didn't make it to the year end.

Its the ultamite fresh start. I feel a little nervous but more excited for what the next year will bring I am the eternal optimist with an 'onwards and upwards!' Feeling always. I've not led a charmed life, I've had awful years in the last decade, lost all my grandparents and a parent ( almost lost my remaining parent to serious illness). The grief I suffered helped my grow in ways I wouldn't have predicted so although I feel this decade has sort of chewed me up.and spat my out it's also shaped me into who I am today. To me it's a day of deep thinking!

What I don't like at this time of year is people taking Christmas lights down straight after Xmas- Xmas lights lift my mood hugely in the winter ( our decs stay up until Jan 6th) and that deflated post Xmas feeling of regret and excess, spent too much, eaten too much and drank too much.

managedmis · 30/12/2019 23:11

I hate NYE

QuietCrotchgoblins · 30/12/2019 23:11

Just re-read my last post and it is megacheesy but true! NYE lifts my spirits in a way no one else seems to feel. I think I might be the odd one out!

decisonsdecision · 30/12/2019 23:11

I am dreading it. 2018 saw some really awkward things but also had something which was really promising for the future but it all went to shit in 2019 and 2020 isn't looking like it's going to be any better. The only good thing is that I have absolutely zero expectation that it will get any better so I won't be disappointed.