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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To find new year's eve abit depressing

205 replies

londongirl86 · 30/12/2019 15:48

I am probably alone in this. I don't blame anyone for having an amazing night out or for having a party at new year's. I don't mind that. It's great if you can! It's just new year's right from being a kid has seemed boring and depressing for me lol. My parents did drink and have a few people over as a child. It was fun playing with my cousin's. But I do remember trying to hide at midnight so Drunk adults didn't kiss me haha. I sometimes remember feeling super tired and wanting to go to sleep. As an adult I've not done the parties since 19/20. Due to work and then having my babies.

Also I don't know why but it gives me this feeling of the end in a negative way. The whole goodbye 2019. New starts. Yes people have bad years. But there's plenty of good things I don't want to shut the door on this year. If that makes sense. Then new year's Day just feels quiet and boring. Plus my partner's back at work on the 2nd of January. So it feels like it's also the end of our family time. It also is like a goodbye to christmas. Christmas went so fast this year. It was lovely and we've been in a state of late nights, junk food and lots of Tele. I have loved it. I don't want it to end lol.

I'm not a misery. I'm not bothered that people have fun. I just can't get into new year's and never have been able to x

OP posts:
iforgotthatyouexisted · 30/12/2019 16:35

I hate NYE but I hate it even more if I stay in as I have massive FOMO so I go out, get drunk, dance and have fun with my friends.

Original poster
londongirl86 · 30/12/2019 16:35

I think people are so tired too. Life's so busy now with both parents often working etc. Also babysitters etc don't seem to be about. My parents had options. I personally don't have anyone to have my kids. So it's also about them and let's face it, you can't get drunk with children in the house. It's totally irresponsible. Nights out in town are just about being groped. Maybe it's being in my 30s now. Its fun when you are young and live at home still with no kids I guess.

It's nice to know I'm not alone.

@QueenOfIce haha that's hilarious. It's so true isn't it. My parents are getting in their mid sixties and late sixties now. They can drive me abit nuts and we don't agree on many things but I still love them. I feel the whole vibe of new year's to be a reminder of what you joked about with your dad. It's like how many more years will we see in together. I really don't like it 😭😂 I think I will order us all a pizza tomorrow night and watch a light hearted Christmas film (maybe the Grinch?) Probably take the kids in the woods new year's Day for a nice walk.

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Medicaltextbook · 30/12/2019 16:35

I don’t like NYE. Will be small party, but given a choice I’d just as well treat the day as normal. I find myself melancholy. 2019 has been a mix of good and bad. I’m worried about the future, and pretty sure NYE will exacerbate that. I hate the games my mother enforces, false jollity.

I often go to bed a bit past midnight anyway, so I’d see in the new year. I definitely can’t be doing with resolutions.

Lippy1234 · 30/12/2019 16:36

I’m not mad on it but I really love 1st January, new year, new start and all that.

speakout · 30/12/2019 16:37

I don't like it either.

I will be spending it alone- and that suits me just fine. Watch some TV, may work, early night.

Sparklesocks · 30/12/2019 16:38

I used to go out for it every year in my 20s and it was normally fun - parties, bars etc - but then having to get the tube home at 3am with drunk people vomiting on platforms or alternatively paying an eye watering cab fare home always put a downer on it. Sometimes I’d stay at friend’s houses but then you wake up hungover and disoriented on a lumpy sofa and still have to travel home! I also resent paying to get into my local pub (although I understand why they do it of voters).

But now we stay in, have a nice dinner and a few drinks and then sleep in our own bed and it’s much nicer. Not as rock and roll but suits me fine Wink

catwithflowers · 30/12/2019 16:38

I used to hate it and the forced jollity and drunkenness. Now my kids are adults and do their own thing, I am in a lovely new marriage and am very, very happy. Our new year this year will be just the two of us with the dog, a log fire, some good wine, a lovely dinner and a film. We rarely stay awake til midnight. Bliss

Original poster
londongirl86 · 30/12/2019 16:38

@iforgotthatyouexisted yeah maybe like five years ago I used to feel like I needed to sound I was doing more than I was. I was embarrassed to say we'd be watching EastEnders so if be like yeah, we go to my mum's for a few drinks. But now I just tell the truth. It did used to bother me that everyone else had had a blast and was in the middle of all the fun. But now I accept I don't like it and I won't change. I guess I'm more comfortable with being boring and my kids make me even more comfortable as I can't do anything anyway due to no childcare.

OP posts:
Original poster
londongirl86 · 30/12/2019 16:39

@catwithflowers that also sounds perfect! Enjoy x

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mum12345abb · 30/12/2019 16:41

I am 65 and all alone after leaving South africa, I think new year celebrations are over rated once you are alone

Original poster
londongirl86 · 30/12/2019 16:43

@Sparklesocks yep that's just grim lol. It's good to have happy memories of being young.

I realised around two years ago that my FB has gone from pictures of parties, clubbing and nights out to most staying in and sharing family days out instead. Everyone's 30 upwards now on my FB and getting married or they have kids.

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Electrocute1980 · 30/12/2019 16:44

I've never liked New Year. It makes me feel sad. I suspect it's probably because mum lost her dad just after new year when I was little so it was always tinged with sadness. DH and I just treat it like a normal Saturday night - a couple of glasses of wine, a movie and maybe some nice crisps or nibbles. We are usually in bed by 10:30! This year DH has D&V so won't be up for wine or nibbles and if I've caught it I'll be spewing by then anyway. The joys!

MadisonAvenue · 30/12/2019 16:45

I don't like it. The thought of a new year starting makes me feel a bit anxious, I know it's just a date but I always worry about what the year ahead will hold.

Original poster
londongirl86 · 30/12/2019 16:45

@mum12345abb AHH yes it probably makes you feel way more alone. But honestly so many people (proof on this post) won't be doing anything other than bathing, watching Tele and maybe a drink and nibbles at home. I hope you find something nice to do like watch a good boxset. X

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jaseyraex · 30/12/2019 16:47

It's pretty much like any other night in our house. We take the kids to the irn bru carnival during the day, have a takeaway for tea, kids go to bed at 7, me and DH might have a drink or two and watch a film then go to bed at usual time which is 10pm. Our youngest wakes around 5am so there's not a chance I'm staying up until midnight.

YANBU!

Original poster
londongirl86 · 30/12/2019 16:47

@Electrocute1980 aghhh noooo. I hope you don't get it. That bluddy stomach bug is doing the rounds this year. We've dodged it so far but I'm sure DD will bring it home from school in the new year.

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Soosiesoo · 30/12/2019 16:47

I hate New Years too, and find it really depressing. The feeling that I 'should' be doing xyz.

We've taken to doing something in the daytime eg. Ice skating and lunch out then films at home in the evening ... works quite nicely.

Original poster
londongirl86 · 30/12/2019 16:49

@MadisonAvenue I know what you mean. It's like you are supposed to change overnight and have a plan. But you don't. Its such a huge crash from last week.enjoying Christmas Eve and presents and family Christmas dinner. All relaxed in our PJ's. I definitely feel it's a huge reminder the holidays are over. It's nice to escape real life for a few days over Christmas.

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PhilomenaChristmasPie · 30/12/2019 16:50

I don't exactly find it depressing, but I don't stay up.

mum12345abb · 30/12/2019 16:54

Its so hard to live on 25 pounds a month ( I did get 10 pounds christmas from DHSS ) , no heating is a bit hard at 65 but at least I have a house to live in ) I havent done food banks yet but will try soonest as it will help so much, i keep 4 hot water bottles and a camping gas stove so try to stay in bed as long as possible , when its warmer I walk alot all day to keep going.!!

AmICrazyorWhat2 · 30/12/2019 16:55

I have mixed feelings. It's the end of the Christmas holidays for us (DS goes back to school on Jan. 2) and DH and I will be back to proper work hours so that's a pain. We're having a family-friendly dinner with friends that evening and I have to cook quite a bit of food...I really can't be bothered! Grin

But, it's a new decade this year so that's exciting, I suppose. I don't mind the fact that my children are growing up, teenagers can be challenging so more maturity would be great! Grin

lilgreen · 30/12/2019 17:01

I know just what you mean OP. My family had NYE parties when I was a child and they were good fun but at midnight I always felt a bit sad and sentimental so it had nothing to do with getting old, just a strange melancholy feeling. I still get it now at 48! We’ve had house parties, meals out and been to NYE celebrations but if it were just me, I’d ignore it. The last couple of years we’ve either got a takeaway or gone out to eat, often going to bed before 12. I quite like to get out on 1/1 for a big walk if it’s dry so it’s nice to have a clear head.

MrsWhites · 30/12/2019 17:01

I’m trying to focus on the exciting things we have planned for 2020 but in a way that brings its own anxieties. We treat tomorrow as a normal day really. Will take the children out for a treat and some dinner out and then come back and watch a movie when they are in bed. I quite fancy The Aftermath which is coming on sky movies tomorrow so that’s the extent of my plans. It’s more the worry of what the next year has in store that I hate, silly really because it’s just another day!

Original poster
londongirl86 · 30/12/2019 17:02

@AmiCrazyOrWhat they go back on the 2nd! Mine is back on the 6th. That feels too early lol. Haha yeah I find enough attitude in mine so I don't look forward to the teen years lol

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Wotrewelookinat · 30/12/2019 17:03

CBA with NYE, staying up, having a hangover and being tired the next day. We just go to bed normal time and sleep! I’m an early bird anyway and love getting up early on NY day, go out for a nice dog walk, pub lunch etc.