To think it's weird that she used the family bathroom?

[FairfaxAikman]

Friend of mine visited the house yesterday.

She's been here before and knows we have a downstairs guest loo but yesterday when she asked to use the loo she went upstairs to the main bathroom (which was in a bit of a mess as wasn't expecting anyone to see it)
To do so she had to navigate two baby gates, so it's not like it's the easier option.

AIBU to think it's weird?

I can't believe this is preying on your mind. To the extent you'd start a thread about it.

In the greater scheme of things, do you honestly care, op?

I actually don't care if she did a shit or not - I was just always taught upstairs is off limits when visiting someone's home. (Unless invited/ there's no other loo and you ask "can I nip to the loo")

Yes. Not weird at all, I’ve known people go home in their lunch break, just to use their own loo in private. YABU

OP, the only thing weird about this is your interest/confusion/obsession about it.

People have spent days eating rich food. It's going to take its toll. Leave the woman alone.

Unless invited/ there's no other loo and you ask "can I nip to the loo")

OP, do you really expect her to have asked 'please can I use the upstairs toilet?' or have said 'I need a poo, can I go upstairs?'

Give the woman a break and let her poo in peace.

A loo is a loo, can't see that it matters which one you use. A bathroom that might be a bit messy, will be of no importance,to someone in urgent need to use the loo. !

Maybe she needed sanpro? Is there any downstairs?

I'd think you were the odd one tbh OP being worried about what loo she uses. I wont use downstairs loos if they're an understair closet. I'm not Harry Potter.

Visitors have no business going upstairs in my home

This is the kind of absolute batshitness that I come to mumsnet for. Lying to guests about bleaching your toilet so they can never use your upstairs bathroom - what if someone comes round regularly, do they think you deep clean the bathroom every day (but only the upstairs one)?

I was just always taught upstairs is off limits when visiting someone's home. (Unless invited/ there's no other loo and you ask "can I nip to the loo")

Really?

I just went to the upstairs lo in SILs house because they don’t have a mirror downstairs and I wanted to know what my hair was doing. I noticed dh was in the downstairs one and seized the moment.
It was a bit mucky up there actually .

Maybe she was just wanting to shoot some heroin?

Visitors have no business going upstairs in my home
Seriously? Of course no-one should be nosing around or going in bedrooms. But to use the bathroom? You do know that lots of houses only have one toilet, yes?

An upstairs bathroom feels so much more private than a downstairs one. If I was likely to be doing anything noisy, I'd definitely use the upstairs one.

I went upstairs in someone's house the other day because there is a lock on the upstairs loo, but no lock on the downstairs one. Could that be the solution to this great loo-based mystery?

Even odder are the replies

It’s either:

1. She wanted to steal the diamonds.
2. She wanted to root around your knicker drawer like a creepy perv and sniff your underwear.
3. She’s an international terrorist and was planning a job but needed to not be disturbed.
4. She’s an international hit man (as above)
5. She needed to let rip and didn’t want the smell to seep into the living room.

My money is in 4.

what a cool thread...

toilet talk: I feel at home already.

Hi.. waves

I was just always taught upstairs is off limits when visiting someone's home. (Unless invited/ there's no other loo and you ask "can I nip to the loo")

I was taught the same thing. If there is more than one loo, I use the guest one. Unless there is someone in there, I ask if I could use the other one. It’s just being courteous.

We have three loos but none of them are a designated ‘guest loo’. They’re all ‘family loos’. We just use whichever one we’re closest to at the time!

In the area where I grew up (and still live) it was VERY rare for people to have more than one toilet and not unheard of for that one toilet to actually be outside. Thinking about it I only have one friend I visit who has a downstairs toilet (and I do use that one) but everyone else has a bathroom upstairs and some of us also have an en suite which is, naturally off limits.

I hate using downstairs loos in other people’s houses. Everyone there seems really nearby

^This

Don't like downstairs loos myself not private enough not even for a pee

I think downstairs loos are ‘guest loos’ so are kept clean and on top of more.

Upstairs ‘family bathrooms’ less likely to be spotless for some of us. (Especially with boys). I’d feel the need to leg it upstairs and check there were no new skid marks or pee on the floor etc.

I had a friend use our upstairs loo as she wanted to nosey about my house!

I do tend to focus on getting the downstairs ‘guest ready’ if people are coming round for dinner and less so the upstairs...