To think it's weird that she used the family bathroom?

[FairfaxAikman]

Friend of mine visited the house yesterday.

She's been here before and knows we have a downstairs guest loo but yesterday when she asked to use the loo she went upstairs to the main bathroom (which was in a bit of a mess as wasn't expecting anyone to see it)
To do so she had to navigate two baby gates, so it's not like it's the easier option.

AIBU to think it's weird?

Just finished on the crapper

Our downstairs loo is at the back of the house and quite tucked away. However I prefer visitors to use the upstairs one as I don’t want them walking through my kitchen. I was also taught upstairs is off limits and that you don’t go in someone’s kitchen unless invited.

• I preempt people using the upstairs loo by saying it’s currently full of bleach cleaning so they must use the the downstairs.

Visitors have no business going upstairs in my home.*

Does it not get tiring being so uptight about things? I just couldn’t be bothered to care

No. I frankly don’t like people in my house full stop let alone inviting themselves into rooms they have no reason to be in. My downstairs toilet is more private than upstairs and my layout means no guest has any reason to be anywhere but my livingroom, downstairs bathroom or hall frankly. Anywhere else is pure nosing around things that don’t concern them.

You made it onto Twitter OP 😂

very entertaining thread. DW is very particular about guests not straying upstairs, but (I think) I wouldn’t mind if they want to use the upstairs loo. Our guests all seem to be happy to use our downstairs loo, unless they are staying over, when they have access to upstairs anyway. The downstairs one is across the hall from the lounge, so quite well insulated soundwise. However, it has no window so it relies on a not very effective extractor fan to freshen the air.

The issue of loud farts reminds me of a joke. During the Coronation procession in 1953, the Queen Mother was riding in a carriage with the King of Tonga. Suddenly one of the horses let out an extremely loud fart and the Queen Mother said quickly “Oh, I’m so sorry about that”. The King of Tonga replied “That’s quite all right, Ma’am - I thought it was the horse anyway”

I hate downstairs loos in other people’s houses. It just seems so public and I can’t relax thinking people can hear me peeing or thinking I may let out an involuntary fart. Also they are usually cramped. Prefer upstairs bathrooms away from the action.

Everyone who comes to my house is a friend or family or known to friends/family so I’m happy for them to use the family bathroom.

Yours too @BatShite. We could be related

I prefer the upstairs bathroom in my own house. Downstairs loo has thin walls backing into the lounge and you can hear everything.

ibs or whatever & was feeling embarrassed about how long she might take & that others might notice or be held up or she needs to clean herself afterwards

We have a loo on the lower floor, middle floor, upper floor and an ensuite adjoining to our master bedroom... I've had guests navigate 2 flights of stairs and go through our bedroom to use our ensuite before.... 🤷 Clearly the others weren't all in use, and they would have had to pass the other 3 toilets before getting to the ensuite, so seemed completely strange to me 😂 but I do always keep the bathrooms clean and tidy so it's no bother, just strange! I even heard the mum directing her child to the ensuite too, as if it was the only bathroom in the house.

Yep same As other Replies

Prob wanted to poo in peace

Plus for the next person she didnt want it to small

Don’t have that luxury here

One loo to wee and poo in 😂😂

I think being uptight about crapping anywhere you your own loo, and about other people doing so in your loo, must be one of the class markers for being lower-middle class.

I don’t like downstairs loos. You can normally hear everything going on. So I would also use an upstairs loo

I hardly know anyone with a downstairs loo. I don’t have one either. I just assume they don’t have one or I forget completely that they have one and automatically head upstairs.

I just can't imagine begrudging a friend the use of whatever bathroom they felt more comfortable using.

I think if you are close enough to be a guest in someones house for a lengthy period of time then you don't need to ask to use the toilet. Surely you just go...? I wouldn't say no to someone using the loo so there's no need to ask. And I don't kind them using either toilet. Whatever makes them feel comfortable! People are weird. Maybe she just wanted to be away from everyone whilst she does whatever she needed to do. Such a strange thread

I also find it really weird that anyone would poo in someone else’s house! I wouldn’t do it, and I also do not poo at work, which can be uncomfortable because I do long shifts but no way do I want a colleague going in there after to me to my poo smell! I also don’t want to experience anyone else’s. I can hold it though and I suppose not everyone can. I don’t use my own downstairs toilet for a poo if my DP is at home. And when we first got together and I stayed at his I would never poo in his toilet - sometimes I would be there for days and I would always find an excuse to go to a nearby shop that had a toilet.

It’s really bad for you to hold your poo in! Just go. Jesus.

I think it’s intrusive. My father in law uses our ‘off suite’ (doesn’t go through our bedroom but adjacent in a separate corridor to the rest of the house) and I really dislike it. We have a downstairs loo and a family bathroom he can use.

Are you thinking along the lines of she was going up for a nosey really, to poke around in your knicker drawer or something?

This is why I don’t like downstairs toilets.

My friends has an upstairs and downstairs bathroom and I always use the upstairs one as you can hear everything in the adjoining rooms and it makes me uncomfortable.