I am dreading tomorrow because of religion!

[StinkyXmasCheese]

Dreading tomorrow with my family.
They are all strong in their faith Christians and I know there will be praying and thanking god etc.
I was brought up Christian but am no longer and I'm actually quite angry about religion at the moment. (Working through these issues with my counsellor.)
I know Christmas is a Christian holiday but I know I can't have a drink or I'll say something to cause an argument and I have to bite my tongue.
I've already said to dh that we're going away for Xmas next year cos I just don't want to deal with it.
I don't know how I'm going to get through the day without letting something slip!

Stay home?

The issue here is not religion, it's your anger. People are allowed to believe what they want without being attacked about it in their own homes.

do you have to spend the whole day with them ?

The issue here is not religion, it's your anger. People are allowed to believe what they want without being attacked about it in their own homes.

^This. If you can’t control yourself the best thing to do is stay at home.

You really do have to bite your tongue. Christmas is technically for practising Christians, if they cant mention it at Christmas or easter when can they?? You want to celebrate a non religious Christmas, that's your choice, but at least give their religious preferences the respect they are entitled to, whatever the reasons for your own issues.

It's Christmas, you need to accept it as a Christian celebration or stay at home. I'm an atheist and dislike religion but will be supportive if others faith especially when a guest in their home, if you can't do that then you need to stay at home.

Whoops, this wasn't meant to go in Aibu. 🤦🏼‍♀️
It will look weird if I don't go and my dh and kids do.
I know I need to bite my tongue but I also know I'm going to be miserable.

It's called being polite, if you can't manage that when you've had a drink or even when sober perhaps you need to not spend time with them?

In the nicest possible way, I think you need to build a bridge and get over it. Don't let something so minor spoil your day (or theirs!).

can you just visit for a couple of hours?
Certainly go away or stay at home next year.
I hear your complaint.

I know Christmas is a Christian holiday

Well, technically it isn’t at all..........

Pagan winter solstice celebrations of the longer days to come long predate its adoption by Christians. It was the Romans who first introduced the holiday of Saturnalia, a week long period of merriment celebrated from the 17 December. To this day many Christmas traditions revolve around its pagan origins. It took Christian leaders four centuries to decide December 25 might be a good time to mark Jesus' birthday

@Andysbestadventure are you aware but you sound extremely unpleasant and rude. If you can’t control yourself may I suggest you leave this thread and mumsnet. I myself am a Christian and there is a lot of different opinions about the origins of Christmas but in my opinion it should be about the meaning today and to have that discussion in a civil way would be welcome but to use profanity and come on here in such a way is totally unnecessary. For more info please read this article.

Well you can console yourself with the knowledge that christmas originally was a pagan festival ( saturnalia) which the Catholic Church hijacked - in a ‘if you can’t beat them join them’ type of thing
Baby Jesus was born in the summer not winter and no where in the bible are Christians told to celebrate his birth

If it’s not your thing ignore the religious side and enjoy the pagan side

Check out this article www.gotquestions.org/Christmas-pagan-holiday.html

Oops cross posted Sorry

*are not is.

I know I need to bite my tongue but I also know I'm going to be miserable

When they pray excuse yourself to put the kettle in or go the the bathroom? Or prep the dinner ?

OP, have you suffered at the hands of your family’s religion? Apologies if not, but you mention counselling and what seems like unresolved anger.

Do you have food in? What a shame, you've been up all night with an upset stomach. Think it might be something you've ate but your scared it's a bug and dc1 wasnt quite right yesterday and you are worried.

Can you play bingo in your head, like bullshit bingo with the things they say that annoy you. Also another technique is to think of a grey rock when the conversation turns religious. Practice grounding techniques, like an alphabet of food. Meditation is also good. Stay sober. I'm glad you are getting some counselling to help you.

Not quite sure why you can’t have a drink. Many Christians like to have a tipple.

When there is praying, can’t you respect their views? In my old school assemblies, the head always used to say that everyone would ‘pray or have silent contemplation’. Therefore, if you are Unable to,pray, just spend the quiet time with your own thoughts.

They brought me up as a Christian as though it was fact and it turned my world upside down when I realised god wasn't real and therefore the foundation of life and reality was not as I believed growing up. I'm angry about it because it did a lot of damage to my confidence. I'm working through it.
I will of course try to keep my tongue bitten but sometimes people say things that you find you can't keep quiet at so it's going to be one of those times where I bite really hard!

Little sweet, good ideas! Thank-you!

Loveislandaddict, alcohol relaxes your inhibitions and makes you more likely to blurt things out