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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Should the grandparents do more?

527 replies

DressedAs · 14/12/2019 15:35

I'm getting frustrated with my mum and a bit my MIL.

DH and I have a one year old DD who has had a lingering sickness and diarrhoea bug for the last two weeks. Doc says she just needs to fight the virus off and to keep her hydrated and she is slowly getting better but still not eating much and sleeping really badly, plus she is clingy all day long and it's just been quite upsetting really.

This has coincided with DH doing a really long hours contract so he is out of the house from 7am until about 9pm each night and I'm pretty much on my own with DD, not able to take her to playgroups etc because of her tummy and I'm really struggling.

My mum was so helpful when DD was born. She lives about a four hour drive away but would come up to us regularly and stay for a few nights and help out. When all this started with DD she kept telling me how "busy" she was, I felt like she was giving excuses not to come and help before I could ask her. Her being "busy" can involve hoovering, meeting a friend for lunch, or posting a letter. She doesn't work.

Today I asked if she could come and help, DH is working all weekend. She said she couldn't as she has a social thing on tomorrow which she can't get out of as it would let others down. Fair enough but AIBU to think she should have offered sooner? I was a bit snippy on the phone and now feel bad but I think she should be trying to help and not just leaving us to it when we are struggling.

OP posts:
Aaarrgghhh · 20/12/2019 09:31

MarissaE Also, you seem to be ignoring the fact the child has a bug and isolation is best. Why should the ops mum become unwell just because her daughter is struggling a bit?

Modernhistorybuff · 20/12/2019 09:36

YABU. The average 1-4 year old gets 11 viruses a year. The average virus lasts 2-3 weeks. Your kid will be ill more than they're well. That's just how it is. You can't expect help just to look after a mildly unwell child.

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