Naked in a family changing room

[apple0pie]

Before I complain can i just check Im in the right?

We joined a gym that has a 3 changing rooms. Male/ female / family. I have older boys and little girl so we use the family room that had lovely big cubicles for changing.

We went for a swim this afternoon and a women was dressing after her shower next to the the lockers with her toddler. My 12 yr son and husband were both with Me and felt uncomfortable. I think I was so shocked I didn't say anything and now wish I had as she could of used the massive female changing room that is for women and children under 7.

Should I of said something or is this normal ?

No-one should be naked by the lockers in a family area - that’s why there are lots of cubicles!

The open area is not for mixed changing.
I bet the same people calling the OP a prude would be demanding a complain if it was a male getting naked in front of a bunch of 14 yo girls.
Female area then I see no issue getting naked then. But a shared area??
Nope

Wait a minute are you sure it wasn't a case of all the family cubicles were taken? Your 12 year old should of used the males, too old for family changing surely?

With two adults, you should be using the single sex changing rooms. So your husband and sons in the men’s and you and you’re daughter in the women’s.

But to be honest, it’s a changing room. You should expect naked people changing and if you don’t swimming isn’t the activity for you.

My Dh does a class and I take kids swimming and then he joins us and so we all get ready together, in the family changing rooms because we are a family.....?

I thought family change rooms were for women with boys not old enough to go into the men’s by themselves but edging in too old to go in the women’s. Or for men with daughters that can’t use the women’s independently but they don’t want to take them into the men’s. Didn’t think it was for people who could take them into the single sex change room as described by your situation. I would have been really pissed lining up to wait in that situation when mine were young and I had both sexes with one too young for men’s and old for the women’s.

I don't beleive this actually happened, but hypothetically no one should be naked in a communal unisex area. Of course they shouldn't. There is no reason for it for one thing. Family change always has proper cubicles.

Another one that doesn't understand why you used the family room.
The lady was naked, so what? It's a changing room, it's where people are occasionally naked. Just don't look if it weirdly makes you uncomfortable.

Regardless of the age of the OPs kids it’s a mixed sex area therefore people should be getting changed in the cubicles not stripping off in the showers. Which is the case in every changing village I’ve ever seen.

Centre parcs is a changing village with communal showers and lockable cubicles. I’ve never seen a naked adult in the showers.

If it wasn’t the OP and her dh walking past it could have been a man with a 6yo kid. Who quite possibly doesn’t want to see a naked woman.

And for everyone who says just don’t look if that was the widely accepted view of everyone then we could just ave mixed changing rooms and toilets everywhere. Everyone could get naked together and it’s fine because you don’t have to look. Because that happens everywhere doesn’t it.....? Oh wait, it doesn’t.

Here we go again I'm sure we had this thread the other week

Person takes off clothes in changing room - how very dare they!

Family changing is for families of young or disabled kids. Not parents of healthy 12 year olds!!

^ this!!

But from what the OP describes it isn’t a changing area, it’s an area infront of the changing cubicles which is where you’re meant to get changed. 🤷‍♀️

I bet the same people calling the OP a prude would be demanding a complain if it was a male getting naked in front of a bunch of 14 yo girls.

No my response would be the same. If he was in the family room with young children then the girls who are more than old enough to use the ladies changing facilities should do so if they are uncomfy.

I thought the communal/family was for parents & small kids? Adults walking about purposely naked isn't right. No changing rooms fair enough, no one's fault, but no need to walk about casually naked.

I'm a single parent and take my 7 and 3yr old boys in there with me.

I agree your DH could have taken your sons to the male changing room. You didn't have to take up a family room.
For people saying it's a family room that's what it's for it really isn't. Think mother & child spots can't park in there if you have a 15 year old...
Was she actually naked though? Or did she have bra/pants on.

I think your son is telling you he's too old to want to be in a family changing area and would probably rather change in the men's. Like another poster said my dd at 12 would have refused point blank to change in a communal family area and even at 9 my son now prefers to use the men's changing room if we go swimming with friends.
As for the lady, I guess you need to ask the gym what their policy is and go with that.

It's news to me that family change is for tiny children only? Our pool ONLY has unisex family changing (with cubicles). There a single sex dry change areas for the gym but you are not allowed to use those if you swim.
So if I went with teen ds, that's where we would be, and I wouldn't expect to see a naked person of either sex.

This is the UK. Not normal here. In most of Europe no-one would bat an eyelid.

YABU why use the family room when your DS is 12 ?

Your 12 yr old son is old enough to get changed after swimming in the men's changing room.

How old is the other son?

Do you share the changing room with your boys? Does your 12 yr old see you naked? I don't understand how you share a changing room with older boys and yet freak out at them seeing another naked woman.

Why aren't the boys in the male changing rooms? 12 is old enough for that.

Your husband can meet you and the younger child in reception or the cafe or wherever you choose. You don't need to meet in the changing room.

On the other hand, a woman ought not be be parading around naked in a family changing area. Did she have young kids with her?

I see much nakedness every year when the German tourists flock to France.
Nothing wrong with the human body.

I'm amazed by these responses, and look forward to the next thread about a naked man in the family changing room, where I can tell the distraught OP that they are just a prude, should have looked away, shouldn't go in there, etc.

OP How does it work with you all in the changing room? Do your sons get changed and you wait outside the cubicle with your daughter?

As you have TWO sons they are quite old enough to go together into the make changing area.

And....your husband ought not to wander into the family changing rooms after his own class- he ought to wait outside as an 'unaccompanied male' because other parents with young children might wonder what he's doing there on his own when he's waiting for you!

Your 12 yr old son will be entering puberty- he needs his own personal (male) space.

Whenever I read this sort of MN ‘problem’ I can hear my mother’s voice saying, “Well, you’ll know for next time won’t you dear.”

I would check what your gyms policy is. At my gym there is male/female/family changing room. I would use the family changing room with my 2 year old DD as they have large cubicles and nappy bins, etc. When she is a bit older is out of nappies I would probably take her into the female changing room. I would say that I’m the family changing room you don’t walk around naked (at my gym there are plenty of large cubicles). However, I’ve never seen 12 year old in the family changing room.

OP I would check your gym’s policy. I have NEVER known family changing rooms being allowed for use by families with non-disabled kids over 8. In most cases they aren’t even allowed to be used by entire families - they are designed for people to take young / disabled children of the opposite sex with them to change.