Naked in a family changing room

[apple0pie]

Before I complain can i just check Im in the right?

We joined a gym that has a 3 changing rooms. Male/ female / family. I have older boys and little girl so we use the family room that had lovely big cubicles for changing.

We went for a swim this afternoon and a women was dressing after her shower next to the the lockers with her toddler. My 12 yr son and husband were both with Me and felt uncomfortable. I think I was so shocked I didn't say anything and now wish I had as she could of used the massive female changing room that is for women and children under 7.

Should I of said something or is this normal ?

Your ds should go in the men’s on his own. No reason or need for him to use a family change area.

But fathers are allowed to be in there - so if the legal age for a boy to be a dad is 16, you're saying no boys between the ages of 10 and 16 approx?!

She was getting changed. It's a changing room. She wasn't getting her tits out in Asda. Totally fine and in context. So what if you get a glimpse of flesh? Are you Victorian?

Your ds should go in the men’s on his own. No reason or need for him to use a family change area.

But that doesn't change the fact that every other person that was in there still had to see this woman does it? How about the dads in there getting their daughters changed? They should have to see it should they? And it's all well and good people saying "don't look" but she was right by the lockers. If you needed to access the lockers how are you going to do that without looking?

Why can't people just follow rules and social convention? Was anyone else changing in that area? If no then that's a sign that she shouldn't be doing it either.

She was getting changed. It's a changing room. She wasn't getting her tits out in Asda. Totally fine and in context. So what if you get a glimpse of flesh? Are you Victorian?

It isn't fine though. Unisex changing rooms with cubicles - you change inside the cubicles. That's the context. No one should be naked outside of the cubicles otherwise you'll get others thinking it's fine to do it too.

So if the area is communal and changing is allowed outside the cubicals then it's fine. If changing isn't allowed in the communal area then I'm wondering what function the communal area is designed for and what the etiquette can be.

Take a different situation - on the beach for example everyone has their own way of coping. Some people don't like kids changing without towels etc around them, likewise adults but - usually - the public loos say 'no changing'

There were spare cubicles !!!!!

200 posts in we finally learn there were spare cubicles ...

If changing isn't allowed in the communal area then I'm wondering what function the communal area is designed for and what the etiquette can be.

Well if it's like my gym and swimming pool the communal area if for walking between pool and cubicles and lockers. It's like a foyer or a corridor. Its not a changing area.

There is a lot of equating being naked to sex or lewdness on this thread. Quickly stripping off while everyone minds there own business in a changing room really should't cause such angst.

Shock, horror, a naked body!

Get a grip everybody. What is the harm of seeing a naked body?

If you don’t want your children to see a perfectly normal naked body then I suggest you take them to a cubicle.

However, i think it is far better for them to understand what normal naked bodies look like and not be shocked or appalled by them.

Where I go swimming there are hardly any cubicles and everyone just gets naked. So far no one has suffered any ill consequences. Men go in the men’s changing room and women go in the women’s changing room. Simple.

They could have just pointedly looked away whilst making their way to and from the lovely big cubicles. I'm not a fan of "public" nudity but I would simply have scurried by, head down, not looking.

I bet people wouldn’t say this if it was a naked man and a 12 year old girl with her mother. MN double standards again ffs!
Poor women/ men bad. Does my head in!

@CanICelebrate I would have said exactly the same thing if it had been a naked man. If you choose to get dressed in a communal changing area then you can expect to see naked bodies. If you don’t like it then go in a cubicle, that’s what they’re there for.

I’m keen to know how the OP manages to get herself dry and changed without showing any flesh. Does she do the same stupid towel tricks that we used to do as teenagers at school because we were young and self conscious? I like to think that most adults have grown out of that nonsense but obviously some people haven’t.

I would have said exactly the same thing if it had been a naked man. If you choose to get dressed in a communal changing area then you can expect to see naked bodies. If you don’t like it then go in a cubicle, that’s what they’re there for.

How does me being in a cubicle prevent me from seeing a naked body when the naked body is right by the lockers?

Me being in a cubicle means that people don't see my naked body, it doesn't mean that I don't see theirs.
In a unisex changing room everyone is meant to use a cubicle. You aren't meant to strip off in the areas near the lockers or in the showers. If you want to get baked in the changing rooms then you go into the single sex changing rooms.

If it bothers you, don't look at her.

I would have thought there should be no nakedness of adults in the family changing room.

If it bothers you, don't look at her.

Depending on where she was that might be difficult if you're trying to get to your locker.

I would have thought there should be no nakedness of adults in the family changing room.

Exactly.

@Hearhoovesthinkzebras but wasn’t someone just getting undressed by the lockers. They were getting undressed in a family changing room with their child. You must expect to see people getting undressed in a group changing room. If you don’t like that then don’t go to a group changing room. Go to one where people are in separate cubicles. Or just don’t be offended by human naked bodies.

Go to one where people are in seperate cubicles
That is exactly what she did. This woman chose not to use them.

but wasn’t someone just getting undressed by the lockers. They were getting undressed in a family changing room with their child.
I think you are misunderstanding the concept of family changing.

It isn't a large open room, with benches around the wall that provides a communal changing space, like many single sex changing rooms do.

It is an area that consists of multiple cubicles, where everyone goes to get changed. The communal areas are where the lockers and showers are but you are expected to have at least bathing suits on in these areas. All undressing is done inside your own cubicle.

Therefore, no one going into this area expects to see anyone naked. This woman was getting changed, according to op, beside the lockers. She should have been inside a cubicle like everyone else.

The only communal changing rooms I know of, where it is permissible to be naked are in the single sex changing rooms, not family changing.

Communal mixed sex changing areas are not allowed in the UK if children are present. It's a safeguarding issue. All the posters who are saying 'get over it, it's normal to see naked people in changing rooms' are in the wrong here.
I use a unisex changing (with different size cubicles and rooms to accomodate families, school groups, disabled people, etc) and it's forbidden to remove costumes in communal areas.