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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask DD2 to change her cat’s name

441 replies

busybarbara · 07/12/2019 17:15

I’m posting this on behalf of my DD who is too mortified. She’s expecting her own DC (my DGC) and had picked out a name that only a few of us knew. Let’s say it’s “Honey” (it’s not but just for example)

DD2 out of the blue has got a kitten and has named it Honey, of course.. Confused DD1 is mortified and has asked me to see if I can get DD2 to change the name of the kitten! AIBU to try to do this?

Yes I’ve seen all the “two names in the same family” threads and have no problem with it when it’s people but having the same name as an animal seems potentially offensive?

OP posts:
diddl · 09/12/2019 08:46

I was wondering what the next installment would be.

Fucck · 09/12/2019 08:54

#TeamDD2

EmmaGrundyForPM · 09/12/2019 09:03

dd2 not ds2!

ShoshanaBlue101 · 09/12/2019 09:11

Please don't tell me that the ex got the house after the split and that DD1 now has her old house too.

How dare you expect dd2 to change the cat's name!
#teamdd2

CatkinToadflax · 09/12/2019 09:15

I think I've just heard the EastEnders doofdoofdoofs in the background....

TotalRecall · 09/12/2019 09:17

I’d bet a kidney DD2 didn’t dump the ex for being infertile. Guarantee it’s something the OP has made up to paint Golden Child DD1 in a better light and make Scapegoat DD2 look bad. I know the games mothers like this play.

More likely infertility caused massive stress and the relationship just broke down. Why would DD2 automatically assume it was male factor infertility with no tests or anything?? Makes zero sense. No one would just automatically assume that.

HoppingPavlova · 09/12/2019 09:57

I’m also calling BS on DD2 dumping him because she assumed he was infertile. How is this anyone’s first thought? Can’t get pregnant, must be you, I’m leaving. It would have been a situation where it could have been 50/50 on where the roadblock was so it doesn’t make sense unless she had already had exhaustive tests in which case you would think they must have been going through this for a number of years. I would think due to many stressors in this situation the relationship just broke down.

Lizzie0869 · 09/12/2019 10:13

And the OP was blatantly drip feeding. I think this accusation is thrown around too much in general but here it was blatant.

Damntheman · 09/12/2019 11:58

:D My daughter shared a name with one of my mother's cats. The cat was older by about 17 years, I just really liked the name! It's not a problem OP, DD can either use the name she chose and laugh about it or she can choose a new name. DD2 shouldn't have to rename her cat.

KnightandDay · 09/12/2019 12:06

Looks like the OP isn't coming back!
#teamDD2

MrsFoxPlus4Again · 09/12/2019 12:09

I hope DD2 gets another cat and finds out the next potential name Grin

DingDongSchadenfreudeOnHigh · 09/12/2019 12:23

More likely infertility caused massive stress and the relationship just broke down. Why would DD2 automatically assume it was male factor infertility with no tests or anything?? Makes zero sense. No one would just automatically assume that.

I think this is more likely, too, Recall

Mypathtriedtokillme · 09/12/2019 12:34

Dd2 needs the gift of no contact for Christmas and a hug! Poor woman.

I have sisters and we all understand the unspoken rule of you don’t date your sisters Ex.

Because I love my siblings, value their happiness and our relationship.
Plus there is plenty of other people who haven’t shagged one if my sisters to date.
Dd1 clearly didn’t get this memo.

SunshineCake · 09/12/2019 12:56

Given the poster doesn't understand that mortified isn't being used correctly in this thread she won't going to have the intelligence never mind emotional intelligence to see how horrible this is for her youngest daughter and by her eldest.

VanyaHargreeves · 09/12/2019 13:13

The thing about this that I find odd also, is that normally when a mother posting is repeatedly accused of having a favourite, they react angrily, and hotly deny it.

Silence from the OP on that score 🤔

Lizzie0869 · 09/12/2019 13:23

And she also seems to have a total lack of empathy. She never bothered to deny that DD1 was her favourite and DD2 was the scapegoat. What's more, she seems totally unaware of how unacceptable that is.

It wouldn't be a surprise to find DD2 on the Stately Homes thread at some point.

Stupiddriver1 · 09/12/2019 13:40

I'm guessing the name is either Matilda or Poppy.

But I do wish it was Gobbolino, loved that book!

ambereeree · 09/12/2019 14:41

This is like a corrie Christmas special!

Crunchymum · 09/12/2019 16:27

And since a few of you asked for more info there’s not a lot I can add but DD2 and him were TTC for a while but it didn’t work out and they split up over it because she assumed he wasn’t able to have children. Well that clearly wasn’t the case but there was a gap of about a year between them breaking up and DD1 getting with him so I’ve never seen it as a problem although DD2 is a bit aloof about the whole thing but not hostile, we still do family Christmas together

What a turn up for the books this update was!

They were TTC were they? and your DD2 assumed he was infertile? And shared all this with you?

Aye alright!

SolitaryGrape · 09/12/2019 16:29

your DD2 assumed he was infertile?

Just a hunch, was it? Not, like, backed up for any kind of infertility diagnosis...?

FizzyGreenWater · 09/12/2019 18:07

I'm name guessing:

Anita
Doreen
Legolasetta
Windowlena
Aimee-Bear
Tilly-Foof

FizzyGreenWater · 09/12/2019 18:08

Hmm maybe he IS infertile and thus DD2 knows something you don't about the evil DD1!!!!!

The cat is going to be called SheShaggedSomeoneElseRunForIt

MatildaTheCat · 09/12/2019 18:27

I'm guessing the name is either Matilda or Poppy

I was going to suggest calling the cat HoneyTheCat on an informal basis but I prefer your idea Smile.

Let’s hope DD1 and sleazy partner don’t have a whole string of DC or poor DD2 will likely become a mad cat lady with a whole house full of felines and bunny boiling tendencies.

NB I’m in the sceptics camp here.

MitziK · 09/12/2019 18:41

Sounds more like he was 'enjoying' his partner's sister's company for much longer if he's already knocked her up.

Better watch out, OP, if you haven't started the menopause yet - once the sleepless nights kick in and Mrs Sloppy Seconds isn't in the mood, you might need to look at getting some contraception sorted.

Fowles94 · 09/12/2019 19:42

I'm sure the cat won't mind them calling a child after it, she will probably see it as a compliment 😉