AIBU to ask some birth story questions?

[SmoothOrange]

I am currently just over 3 months pregnant with my first baby, and to be honest I am stating to shit myself!

I know it is going to hurt, like really really hurt but I was wondering if someone could give me a bit more info on this.

So the labour pains are the contractions right? Excruciating stomach pains?

What I wanted to know is, when you are pushing and experiencing that "ring of fire", how long does this go on for? surely once baby has crowned it doesn't take that long to push it out?

Argh! I am so scared about the pain, and something going wrong.

If you discovered you were pregnant again, what would you choose (if you could choose)

A: Vaginal birth with epidural
B: Vaginal birth with no epidural
C: C section
D: I would never go through that pain ever again!

I just want to be fully prepared for what will happen because at the moment none of it seems real!

Whilst I don't particularly want to hear horrendous horror stories, feel free to share your experiences :)

Also, do pelvic floor exercises make the birth go easier?

You could look for a Positive Birth group in your area.

I had a freebirth, so no drugs or medical staff, and I would do it again.

I wouldn't describe any of the sensations I felt as pain (I didn't even notice crowning); it was more like discomfort, like you'd been for a run and had aching muscles and were out of breath. Which is unsurprising, as it's hard physical work, i.e. labour.

I think a large chunk of it is about mindset, so I would advise educating yourself on the process of normal physiological birth and positioning, and not assuming One Born Every Minute is how it's supposed to be and getting anxious about it, because that's likely a self-fulfilling prophecy.

Honestly, hard as it seems - try not to worry too much. It will happen, the baby will arrive, all being well.

My baby was back to back - I was in absolute agony at just 3cm! So they induced me and I had an epidural (it's amazing!) - I ended up in theatre with a spinal, episiotomy and forceps, then 1.2 litres of blood loss. I'd still do it all again tomorrow.

I never felt traumatized by my birth because I was so well cared for - being in theatre having a spinal done is scary, and I'm planning on having a debrief soon as it did affect me mentally - but the pain does end.

The thing I'd say is not to bother with a birth plan; even if there's something you're adamant you don't want, they may have to do it if it means saving you and/or baby. Try and keep as calm as you can, remember your breathing,

You can't know what it's like until you do it, and nothing can prepare you, but you can't know until you're there - and it may be a breeze! It isn't awful for some women. Good luck :)

2 births only felt one contraction.

With eldest she was back to back and I was induced. Nothing was happening and someone asked if I wanted an epidural.

Said yes and as they were putting it in I had the most horrendous pain.

I remember looking at the clock and thinking I had read the shortest time for Labour was 2 hours and I didn’t think I could manage that pain for 2 more seconds.

But then the epidural kicked in and it was plain sailing from there.

I have a tilted cervix so next pregnancy had an elected CS

Definitely the way to go.

Having said that my friend who refused blood tests and anything invasive gave birth with no pain relief and didn’t find it too bad

You don’t know what it will be like till you are in the midst of it all. Everyone is different

I did spend both of the birth shouting 'i just need to pooooooo'.