God almighty, I'm usually against MN deleting threads but @HerculesMulligan I would perhaps be asking MNHQ to do it in this case (or hiding it yourself perhaps).
Judging people for not driving, asking if he doesn't do the weekly shop, saying OP clearly just doesn't want to go, she doesn't want her DH to go, suggesting he buy a car, suggesting the OP is controlling, saying she has a long line of excuses, calling DH wet...fuck me.
People are either not RTFT, or just are rude and superior judges, or being more generous - people that don't understand the awful effects of recent events like OP has experienced. Things like that affect everything you do for such a long time afterwards, it's not like falling over in Starbucks and cutting your knee. They affect the whole family, not just OP and her DH but her DC and also her parents.
Situations like this wedding, in these circumstances, which people normally would see as just a minor obstacle, can seem insurmountable. For example, those of us that like to swim. If you are healthy and well, swimming happily in your normal pool and do fifty lengths every day. Someone says right you need another thirty lengths before you get out, it might be hard but you can do it, you might have to push yourself a little more than usual.
But if (for example) you have weights attached to your ankle and a wrist in a plaster cast the thought of doing those extra thirty lengths when you're struggling to complete your normal fifty, makes it seem impossible and just beyond you.
Those weights and plaster cast aren't meant to be literal metaphors for medical problems, it's just the mental effort to get through the days when you have the trauma (as well as physical effects) still with you. Every single day you have to get up and do your fifty lengths with all that shit weighing you down, you struggle but you get up and do it every single day. Then someone comes along and says, right do thirty more now, you'll be fine now, you're just making excuses, just crack on with it...
Well @HerculesMulligan I think you're doing a bloody good job on this thread - not being deleted yet, you're a better person than I am 
so I imagine you're doing a bloody good job in RL too and should be applauded for what you do do under the circumstances, not for what you don't do (or just don't feel up to doing).
And I also think if the groom is a good enough friend, he will recognise the effort your DH makes to get there even if it is alone, and be happy and grateful, rather than judging you for not coming too, like a load of MNers who don't know you and don't have a clue what your life is like and aren't kind enough to even try and imagine.