My cousin is naming her DD the same name as my DDs

[hedgehug]

My cousin has accounced the name she has chosen for her daughter who was born earlier thid week. This name is exactly the same as my daughter's only different spelling, one letter difference, same pronunciation. It's not a very popular name but not unusual either. I just find it really odd that she would use the same name, no one in our family shares a name, we all have very different names and I think it will be really confusing. We spend a lot of time together as a family, our children spend a lot of time together, I'm just really confused as to why she would pick the same name. WIBU to talk to her about it?

What name is it?

I accept that poster acknowledged that and no offense was intended to her.

I was railing against the idea that its a universal insult to name your child the same as anyone else's child.

Our family has similar names because people married into the family. Some with exact same names (eg 2 John Doe) and when you then throw in extended family then there are even more which have similar names - so my niece/nephew has multiple johns, janes and James for example within their family.
No one is confused as we all just have nick names to make it easier

Sounds like my cousin, when I announced my eldests name before she was born my cousin said "oh I like that I think I'll name mine same"...which me and my entire family all said...why???? Chose another name. She did in the end...but she also went and got pregnant after both times I announced my pregnancies after my 12 week scan...she really didn't like me having attention 😂😂 but no you are definitely not unreasonable, there's plenty of names she could chose...be original woman !

Wouldn't raise it. We had a very tough road having children. If we had a boy, the name would have been Ben. Our niece and their husband knew this, and named their son when he arrived Ben. Given our tough road it was heartbreaking and led to a family rift. If they had let us know in advance then we would have found it easier. All in all we didn't speak for a long time and even now it's hardly a close relationship, although four years have passed. All in all, looking back, I wish we had just kept quiet.

All in all we didn't speak for a long time

That seems like a serious over reaction to someone using a name you might use, particularly as it's not an unusual name.

Maybe, but when I say having children was not easy for us, it is a heavy understatement. Given the family knew our struggles, tears and stress, a simple heads up would have been sympathetic. That said, like I say, in retrospect wouldn't have raised it.

I understood what you meant. And yes, a heads up might have been sympathetic but given your reaction when they used the name, they may have been afraid to tell you.

I absolutely sympathise with your struggle and I hope you now have the dc you clearly yearned.

I have the same name as my cousin. A cousin of mine has the same name as our uncle. My BIL and FIL have the same name. So I’ve never seen this sort of thing as odd or as an issue - names aren’t that precious, you can share them.