My feed
Premium

Please
or
to access all these features

AIBU?

To contemplate reporting someone for possible benefit fraud? WWYD?

404 replies

WWYDhey · 30/11/2019 12:16

So there’s this girl I know. Not a close friend but someone I know and would say hi to in the street. We are Facebook friends. I know a bit about her through mutual friends.

She is claiming as a single parent of two kids but her boyfriend lives with her. Full time. They have actually just become engaged and she is pregnant. He has 3 kids to someone else with which he sees 2 of them every other week.

He is ‘unemployed’ but I believe he works full time for cash in hand. (Some kind of joinery or building work)

What has made me consider reporting her (if that’s something you can even do??) is that she spends all her ‘free’ money on weekly hair up appointments, professional make up done. New nails etc (we all know this as she documents everything on Facebook) always out at restaurants and nights out. Almost like she is bragging.
Doesn’t look like she spends much on her kids. They always look a bit scruffy and bored in her photos. (Think tops that look too small or worn out)

And now that she’s pregnant she’s uploading loads of expensive purchases for the baby (ted baker everything, massive pram ordained in Jewell’s)

Now I know some of the replies I will get here will be along the lines of ‘what’s it got to do with you how she spends her money’

  • well yes it has nothing to do with me but it is really irritating that I work full time with kids and pay a lot in tax and have to scrimp and save. I don’t get all of the luxuries she does. Yet ina round about way I contribute to it.


‘How do you know she’s on benefits’ our mutual friend knows she is for certain. Plus she works 18 hours per week in a cafe so it’s not rocket science.

So would you report someone claiming as a single parent when she isn’t?

YABU- Dont report her and don’t give it another thought

YANBU- Do report her

If so how would you report anonymously?
OP posts:

Am I being unreasonable?

1421 votes. Final results.

POLL
You are being unreasonable
30%
You are NOT being unreasonable
70%
LolaDabestest · 30/11/2019 12:20

Keep your beak out ffs ...yes it's wrong but so is being bitter it's not a good look. You've paid taxes for years blah blah blah but so has my elderly family member for 60 odd years didn't stop him having disgraceful treatment by the nhs in his final days so that means shit.

WWYDhey · 30/11/2019 12:21

What I forgot to add is that every single week she’s out at a restaurant with her fiancé NEVER with her kids. And she gets her make up done and hair put up for it (tags herself in the beauticians and hairdressers every week) then shows photos of her new look..

She NEVER posts anything about doing fun stuff with her kids. They are never at soft play or farm parks etc. NEVER.
Although she does post pictures of them watching tv or eating dominos etc.

OP posts:
WWYDhey · 30/11/2019 12:22

@LolaDabestest

What has any of this got to do with the NHS?

Perhaps if there were less people committing benefit fraud there would be more money for the NHS?

OP posts:
BarrenFieldofFucks · 30/11/2019 12:23

Well, leaving the benefits aside, what point are you trying to make re the kids? How is that connected?

PrayingandHoping · 30/11/2019 12:24

If I genuinely thought I had the correct facts then yes I would. There is no place for benefit fraud in society

WWYDhey · 30/11/2019 12:25

@barrenfieldoffucks

True point. But I guess I needed to point out the benefits she is fraudulently claiming are not going on the children like they would be intended for.

They are going on her appearance and nights with her fiancé.

So if she was wrongly claiming benefits but it was to give her kids everything they needed I might have a different view.... perhaps

OP posts:
Testamentritualis · 30/11/2019 12:26

Just report her

DDIJ · 30/11/2019 12:26

This reply has been withdrawn

Message from MNHQ: This post has been withdrawn

WWYDhey · 30/11/2019 12:28

@DDIJ

That’s sad. So you never take them to a play place or a park?

OP posts:
ColdTattyWaitingForSummer · 30/11/2019 12:29

I don’t know. On the one hand, people playing the system make claiming harder for genuine claimants. On the other, I get disability benefits, I also regularly get my hair blow dried at the hairdresser; what people other than my close friends don’t know is that I struggle to wash it myself safely due to my lack of balance, so I use a percentage of my PIP to pay someone to do it for me. (And not looking like sh1t all the time has done wonders for my mental health as well.)

Thesearmsofmine · 30/11/2019 12:29

How do you know so much about what she is claiming when you aren’t close? I mean you might know what someone has told you but I take gossip with a pinch of salt.

If you were genuinely concerned about her children then that would be a call to social services.

LolaDabestest · 30/11/2019 12:29

My point was fuck them. And no maybe if they had t over populated the country there would be more money for the nhs. Why are you being so resentful of this woman? You seem to know everything she spends on and does and it makes you sound petty. You know nothing fully about her life just hearsay etc you don't know how this would affect her or her kids no need.

PrayingandHoping · 30/11/2019 12:33

What she does with the money really doesn't matter in my eyes. If she shouldn't be claiming it she shouldn't be claiming it. End of

90schic · 30/11/2019 12:33

You can go to jail for benefit fraud. I know what she is doing is irritating and wrong, I totally agree with you. But what if she got sent to jail and her kids (albeit bored and scruffy) with her went into care? How would you feel then OP? Sometimes best to just let things slide. Unfair bad stuff happens in the world every day.

PinkiOcelot · 30/11/2019 12:33

You’re always going to get people saying keep your beak out. Mind your own business blah blah. I don’t know why some people take that stance, especially when some people live in poverty or even on the streets. It’s disgusting. It’s stealing!
Yes I would report her!

WWYDhey · 30/11/2019 12:34

@LolaDabestest
She documents everything on Facebook. I think all of her FB friends know about her life.

Resentment as every Saturday without fail she is in a hair salon having an up do and then make up done. Followed by a night out. That’s not a cheap habit.
When many wouldn’t be able to afford those luxuries on even a full time wage.
I am being petty you’re right but I’m not ashamed of that on this occasion.

OP posts:
PinkiOcelot · 30/11/2019 12:34

Then she goes to jail! So what. She is breaking the law. It would be on her head if her kids were out in to care. Not the OP!

KarmaStar · 30/11/2019 12:35

Are the children uncared for,neglected op?I would be concerned foremost with their welfare.
The benefit fraud would be second to them,but if she is claiming money she is not entitled to them you can give the facts that you have to the relevant office.

PinkiOcelot · 30/11/2019 12:36

You’re not being petty at all OP. It amazes me what people get their knickers in a twist on here about but seem perfectly happy with people committing benefit fraud.

Endeavour1971 · 30/11/2019 12:38

Report it! If she is doing nothing wrong then no action will be taken. But if she is committing fraud, she'll have to pay back what she wrongly claimed. I hate benefit fraudsters

IceCreamAndCandyfloss · 30/11/2019 12:38

I would report if I was aware theft was going on. Stealing is always wrong however it’s done and regardless of the reason.

TheQueef · 30/11/2019 12:38

Some people are just weasels.

C8H10N4O2 · 30/11/2019 12:39

As new poster OP you may not realise that benefits bashing posts citing "person I know who goes to Barbados four times a year with her 59 children, all on benefits" appear most days.

Hence people may be slightly sceptical.

Awwlookatmybabyspider · 30/11/2019 12:41

You know an awful lot about her to say you’re not “close friends”, and I’m sure she doesn’t tell the world and his wife about what she claims on Facebook.
Why do you want to ruin this family’s Christmas. How will that enhance your life. People do what they have to in order to survive.

TheQueef · 30/11/2019 12:42

So you can focus your impressive sense of civic duty in the most cost effective way.

To contemplate reporting someone for possible benefit fraud? WWYD?
Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.