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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

Original poster

Bare bum in dressing room , AIBU.

892 replies

pinkboa · 26/11/2019 22:57

I take DS to swimming. I got the times wrong turned up for the wrong lesson. I decide to go back to the changing room to wait. I find it hard to breath in the pool area, 30 minutes is ok, an hour and I can feel my asthma begin to act up.

There is a dad there getting his daughters dressed (fine) he was in the pool and he's down to his underwear.

Another dad arrives with his son, him and my DS are in the same lesson.

Anyways dad of daughters decides to get dressed... he drops his pants and is stark naked in front of his daughters. He is also by the door so if another parent was coming in their child would have walked into his penis! And it wasn't less than a minute because he was drying himself as well 🤢...

There are cubicles. He could have used a towel as well.

Why would and adult choose to get naked in a dressing room at a swim lesson for children with strangers around.

AIBU to find it bizarre?

His bum was also hairy and unattractive 🤢.

OP posts:
honeyloops · 07/02/2020 08:49

It's a changing room. Where people get changed. YABU.

Oulu · 07/02/2020 09:09

Frankly as a woman, with a son why can't I take him to the Male changing room? confused...

At the operative time, you weren't taking him - your son had already been changed and you were just sitting there.

I still find it unfathomable that you would think it appropriate to take a two year old in nappies into the men's changing room anyway. As for being enraged at people getting naked, the clue's in the term "changing room": it's for people to change in. If you don't want your child to see naked people, it's for you to take your child into a cubicle, not the other way round.

Tomatogravy · 07/02/2020 09:18

Why you’d go into the men’s then complain about seeing a mans bum.. you don’t go in the men’s unless you are a man. Your child goes in your gender appropriate changing room until they get changed alone! He was probably fuming with you 😂😂

JRUIN · 07/02/2020 09:28

You sat in a communal changing room for a whole hour??? Surely there was somewhere better for you to wait? Your DS must have been bored shitless. Did you not feel like a weirdo hanging around the changing room for so long? Didn't you worry you would make people feel uncomfortable? Would a man getting naked in the changing room been less offensive to you if his bum had been smooth and pert? Why did you get your times mixed up anyway, was it your first time? It doesn't read as such. One more question would a man getting naked in the changing room been less offensive to you if his bum had been smooth and pert?

Logfootlightoe · 07/02/2020 09:31

The only odd thing I would find about this situ is an adult sitting in a changing room, not changing or changing a kid, watching other people.
If a bloke did this the police would be called!

RockinHippy · 07/02/2020 09:32

Oh FFS, stop sexualising the non sexual, that is YOUR issue. The poor bloke was getting changed with his DC, not waving his willy helicopter style in your face Biscuit

1forsorrow · 07/02/2020 09:45

Logfootlightoe that is so true. Sitting there for an hour watching people getting changed. I can see the police being called no problem. The comments about his bum would indicate she was having a good look.

LolaLollypop · 07/02/2020 09:56

Haven't read all 34 pages but just wanted to say this is the funniest post I've ever read on MN Grin

Swatsup · 07/02/2020 10:01

He was using a changing room as a changing room. I would have been more concerned about the person sat in the changing room for half an hour watching people get changed.

Swatsup · 07/02/2020 10:04

Maybe he would normally leave his children there and go to the cubicle to get changed himself but felt uncomfortable doing so with you watching them?

Judystilldreamsofhorses · 07/02/2020 10:11

This thread was one of my favourites last year. No idea how it's popped back up, but am very pleased to see it.

SerendipityJane · 07/02/2020 10:23

This thread was one of my favourites last year. No idea how it's popped back up, but am very pleased to see it.

(raises hand)

guilty ... I posted a link in the ongoing thread where a lady was described how another mother was in the male changing room to change her 10 yo son. Mainly to demonstrate that there really are some odd takes on life out there.

Mycatwontstopstaring · 07/02/2020 10:34

Yanbu. It’s illegal. If I brought a daughter round the corner and walked into seeing someone’s dick then you can bet I’d be complaining/ reporting to police.

If it’s a unisex changing area then he should keep his bits covered under towel or use the cubicle.

It’s irrelevant what they do in a Germany/Sweden etc, just as it’s irrelevant what the public indecency laws are in Saudi and Iran.

SerendipityJane · 07/02/2020 10:36

Mycatwontstopstaring

You've not quite read this thread have you ?

iklboo · 07/02/2020 10:42

Yanbu. It’s illegal. If I brought a daughter round the corner and walked into seeing someone’s dick then you can bet I’d be complaining/ reporting to police.

It's really NOT illegal for a man to have his bare bottom on show IN THE MEN'S CHANGING ROOM.

Streamside · 07/02/2020 10:46

What's really worrying is when a naked man uses the hairdryer to blow dry himself.At a time there were a lot of migrant workers in our area and this was quite common. They were given towels by a local charity shop and the problem was solved.My colleague still has us in stitches about taking her children past the young naked man with his foot up on the bench drying his bits.

Oulu · 07/02/2020 11:03

If I brought a daughter round the corner and walked into seeing someone’s dick then you can bet I’d be complaining/ reporting to police.

If you bought your daughter into a man's changing room and complained to the police about seeing naked men in there, it's you who would be arrested for wasting police time.

Winesalot · 07/02/2020 11:39

Yay!! It’s back!!! Love this thread. Sheer lunacy!

SwedishK · 07/02/2020 12:30

I’m not sure what the concern is? Is it that he’s naked in front of his daughters or that he’s naked in a changing room full stop? It’s hard to get changed without taking your clothes off. Also, his daughters have probably seen his willy hundreds of times. I have certainly seen both my parents naked on multiple occasions. With my dad, probably weekly growing up. There is nothing sexual about it, it’s your dad!

Diverseopinions · 07/02/2020 13:02

If it's a school setting and a school pool and school changing rooms, wouldn't this be a boys' changing room - the one OP's son usually uses and probably headed for. It is interesting that parents were swimming in the school pool alongside their kids. I wonder if it's usual for schools to invite parents in to swim, rather than just hosting swimming lessons for the children.

AngryAtYouTube · 07/02/2020 13:58

Wait - you were in the mens?!?!

I was totally shocked thinking your pool was like ours and big open locker area and then individual or family cubicles.

But no. You were in the mens changing room. Where a man was changing.

You're joking, yes?

iklboo · 07/02/2020 14:27

If it's a school setting and a school pool and school changing rooms, wouldn't this be a boys' changing room - the one OP's son usually uses and probably headed for.

It's not a school swimming pool.

Winesalot · 07/02/2020 14:36

Plus diverseopinions her son is in nappies.

Southmouth · 07/02/2020 14:38

OP after first reading this I though YANBU, I wouldn’t be happy in that situation. Now since reading that you were in the men’s changing room YABU! What’s strange is you sitting in the men’s changing room using it as a waiting area! If it was a man sitting in a ladies changing area waiting, would you find that ok?! I doubt not!

If you don’t want to see a penis, get out of the men’s changing room Hmm

PrinnyPree · 07/02/2020 14:42

I'm guessing he was getting changed in a unisex changing room, perfectly normal, us Brits can be so up tight lol.

I find the half hour hanging around in the changing room observing people getting changed and commenting on their appearance with puke emoji's, instead of going back to the reception area or the car stranger.