To ask how many hours your DP spends playing videos games

[Cchick]

Just what the title says really.

My partner spends maybe 15-20 hours a week on average (sometimes he can spend 12 full hours!) and I was wondering how many your partners spend. I mean he's playing the games with other people, so is this normal in other households too?

FYI, we don't have any children yet and we aren't married yet. I'm just very worried that if we do marry and have kids, the family would come second to gaming. Everyone says to look out for red flags and I'm wondering if this is one?

Long story short, how many hours do your partners spend gaming and has it reduced since marrying and having children?

TIA!

When single my DH probably gamed on devices 5-10 hours per week. This was years ago - he’s now got a family and doesn’t do any as he says he’s far too busy having more fun with us. Inside We play board and card games and have got back into tabletop gaming like Dungeons and Dragons which is wonderful for the imagination and maths for the children and really sociable.

@ChilledBee They also spend hours on this site as if that's more acceptable than gaming

We have kids and DH has always spent a few hours a day gaming. It's his hobby, most of the judgemental people on here thinking games are for kids have no idea how sophisticated and varied they are.

But there needs to be a balance to make it work. He cooks and does his share of the house work. We always eat together with the kids and we maybe watch a couple of episodes of something together before he goes back to gaming.
I think not eating together would be a problem for me.

Well one does have to get their hour of judging the masses every day.

None! I couldnt have sex with a grown man who plays video games!

None! I couldnt have sex with a grown man who plays video games!

Why not?

None on a regular basis.
We do have a wii somewhere that comes out if there really is nothing to do or we have family over with young kids, but we play that together.

None! I couldnt have sex with a grown man who plays video games!

Congratulations?

Ive worked out the hobby of some ofthe posters on this thread.

Competative smugness.

Still can’t get a decent answer as to why people are so against gaming....are you also against board games? Jigsaw puzzles?

Mumsnet one day

OP: So, my son (12) is really interested in playing Call Of Duty because all his friends are playing it? What do you think?

Mumsnet: Noooo, you can't let him, it's rated 18 for a reason, he's a child, that game is for adults.
(completely agree there)

Mumsnet the next day...

OP: How many hours does your DH spend gaming?

Mumsnet: 0, he's not a child. [then those posters sit back and chuckles smugly like Goofy to themselves thinking they're the only poster to have come up with that withering put down on a thread that's 15 pages long.
.

I think the main issue with gaming is the amount of time it takes. So, looking through the thread, most posters with a partner who games say that 2-3 hours a day is the norm. Often more.
No other hobby seems to eat so much into people's time (aside from perhaps people who slump in front of the tv for 2-3 hours a day, but I wouldn't be a fan if my DH did that either).
I'm an obsessive runner, but it doesn't take 2-3 hours every day. Ditto cycling.

Gaming is no better or worse than other sedentary hobbies like watching films, playing board games, doing jigsaws or whatever. But those things don't take over in the way that gaming seems to, leaving little time for much else.

(Oh, and I'm not anti gaming. I do like a game and I LOVED Final Fantasy back in the day. It's immersive, exciting, challenging - but IME spending hours a day sitting playing games isn't easily compatible with a healthy lifestyle and family life..)

No competitive smugness here, just stating facts

I game more than DH, we have had times where we cant game at all due to childcare and work. It’s balance with any hobby. DH gave up cricket when DS was small for a while as it was just a bit much.

The game DH plays stat wise he is top 1% in the world, it’s a 30 min race every day. The game I play I only make top 2% and much teasing takes place.

About it being childish DH has a PhD from Cambridge and consults on huge projects worldwide earning rather a lot of money. I helped write one of the first equal opportunities policies while working in local government as a very young woman whilst also being really quite good at playing mega Apocalypse.

If any partner has any hobby that infringes on their personal life whether time indulged, money spent or ignoring their partner or children its obviously very wrong.

Gaming isn’t the issue it’s partners not wanting to spend time with their loved ones. I had a friend whose DH played golf and they almost divorced over it as he was selfish.

None. He doesn’t play video games, but he does spend a lot of time watching sport. Almost as much as me, in fact

"HeS aN aDuLt"

Because 18+ don't dominate the gaming market? Have you ever seen E3? The gaming expo with almost 70,000 adults in attendance.

You all need to get off you high horses and go back to crochet or whatever hobbies you do in your free time.

@Runningonempty84 thank you for your answer. I agree that obsessive gaming is a problem but surely all gamers shouldn’t be lumped into that category. The people saying they wouldn’t have sex with a gamer or it’s for children are patronising and implying that the mere act of playing a video game is pathetic and weird. And I heartily disagree with that and think the best games rival the best films and books for story and experience.

I am so bad at getting my point across so hopefully one of the more eloquent posters will clear it up for me....

Anyway you are right - Final Fantasy kicks ass

Hi @Costacoffeeplease you said you are just stating facts. Here is your previous post;

Zero. Fuck all
That’s why we’re still married
It’s a good idea to marry a man and not a boy

I don’t see any facts just patronising

Can you use your facts to explain what is wrong with gaming?

Those are all facts🤷‍♀️

But why does gaming make one a boy not a man?

Some people sound so stuck up on here! Must be the same women who would only marry for looks or money. My OH works for a very large gaming company & makes a good wage, it's his dream job & was very lucky to get into such a competitive field. So he "plays games" a lot during his work day, and Monday and Wednesday evenings he spends around 2 hours. It does not make him a child.

DH plays maybe 10 hours a week. But I’d say half of those are while I’m doing something else (my own hobbies etc) and the other half, we’re gaming together. He doesn’t do online stuff and it is really just a hobby like any other.

It’s just so unattractive. The men that I know of that play video games have big bellies and collect walking dead figurines and are obsessed with game of thrones it’s fine if that’s what they’ve joy, but I just don’t get how anyone can be attracted to anyone like that.

Like that man who owns the comic book shop in the simpsons

The Simpsons? Imagine being an ADULT that watches cartoons. How childish. 🙄