What do I do about MIL this Xmas after last year's drama??

[Itsme93]

Hey all,
I've currently got the boyf of 2 years asking me what I'm going to get his parents for Xmas.
I wouldn't usually mind as I love Xmas & buying presents however last year I had a few problems....

1. I bought his parents a fancy coffee machine as they love coffee but strangely enough they never bought themselves one so I thought, great gift. A few days after Xmas, the boyf said his mother was not happy because I 'showed her up'. I asked him how? Apparently my present was too grand as she had only bought me a size 8 crop top (which I think was a recycled present as its definitely not my style and I'm a size 12 - before anyone jumps on this about accidental wrong sizing, his mum is fully aware I'm not a size 8 nor would I ever wear a crop top!) I said it was fab etc thanks so much on the day though.
2. instead of buying his sister, I bought gifts for her little girl instead. Apparently MIL was not impressed by that and that I should have got his sister something.
3. one of the gifts I got his neice was a rocking horse which the little girl loved and Xmas day wouldn't get off it. MIL was not happy that my gift overshadowed hers and said 'I wish this gift had been from me'.
4. last Xmas I bought boyf an updated ipad as his had broken, within 6 weeks he gave it to his sister because the mother said the neice would like it to play games on. I wasn't impressed and said I'd rather have it back. Boyf still gave it to the niece

I rarely see any of his family, find them quite socially inept however I am happy to get them something. I told boyf for him to sort it out this year but he wants to do it seperately and with already asking me what I'm getting them all, he's obviously got expectations which has actually p*ssed me right off.

Do I finish with him lol I really feel like he's part of the problem and I'm fed up of these expectations of me having to impress his family like I'm not good enough, as that's how I feel.... Or do I act like nothing and just do vouchers?

Waste not want not but fuck me, they sound like peasants, do they pick corn out their poo Aswell to eat the next day?
Run, very fast... You've done the right thing op!

Yep...weird!

She sounds like a lion

Have you broken up with him then? I can't quite tell. Hope so!!!

A loon not lion!!

I think OP has from her other msg although I'd have looked forward to this years Xmas gift story especially after all these excellent suggestions

I missed the update. Well done OP best decision you could of made. Hope you have a fab Christmas this year lol.

They sound like incredibly hard work and stressful.

I read posts like this, and then I imagine all the stress leaving the OP’s body as soon as she dumps the cunt.

I can not imagine living like this.

GOOD FOR YOU!! 🤩💪🏾

This is the only life we will ever get given. Surround yourself with good people who make you laugh and make you feel loved.

You sound lovely, thoughtful and kind - I’m sure you will live an infinitely better existence without these nasty shit heads around.

Wow, you have dodged a bullet there

I've never bought gifts for a boyfriends family! Once you get to the stage where you give a gift you just do a joint gift from both of you never separate!

Bin the lot of them. They sound weird, ungrateful and grabby.
Save your time and money for yourself and treat yourself to what you wished had been bought for you.

I'm so pleased you've ended it. Well done!!!

is that not strange?

Here's the thing: we're all a bit strange in some ways. The trick is to find people who feel good to you. That feeling of discomfort is not the same as feeling good. It's important to listen to that.

I’d ditch the boyfriend. If it’s one piece of advice I’ll be giving my son when he’s older with a long term girlfriend, it’ll be how might the in-laws impact on your life, mentally and socially, including any BILs and SILs.

I mean impact on my son’s life.

Oh good, I see he’s been ditched! Good decision.

Why are you even seeing all of his family on Christmas day? I'd spend it with my own family if I was you, he's only a boyfriend and by the sounds of it it's not likely to last indefinitely.

Nevertheless, if you really feel you have to buy them gifts keep it simple, it really does only need to be a token gift for people you barely know.

Well one OP. You’re well out of it. What a bizarre family your ex-BF and his bunch are!!

It should be a joint present or nothing

TBH I would be livid if my BF gave away my present. Then we come to his family, i understand how your rather extravagant presents may have embarrassed them but their response was very rude. You spent a lot of effort and money to get something lovely for them, all you have got back is grief! I say, stuff them all! Tell them this year you’ll be making a donation to charity on their behalf instead of presents. Then I’d rock up with a box of chocolates and a bottle of fizz, maybe some small presents for the kids. If they don’t like that, stuff them!

Just noticed you’ve ended it! Good move

Have you split up then, OP?

Sack him off.

I’m 23 so the same age you were when you got with him, I wouldn’t accept any of the behaviour in your last post as it’s so off-putting. You can absolutely do better. You’re young, no need to settle for trash out of desperation - I’m sure you have other options.

I can’t believe they sold the iPad, that would genuinely infuriate me. If you do somehow manage to stay together, don’t buy them anything. I wouldn’t even bother with a token gift as they clearly don’t respect you. Let’s be honest, they’ll probably just sell it on and they certainly won’t be spending any effort on you/your gift.

Also, I would do my best to avoid them over Christmas. Have dinner with your family or even alone if it cones to it as dinner with them will be awkward and you will be confronted/ambushed by all of them.

Good for you OP!
And yes that is really grabby! It seems his sister is single, can’t imagine why?
And the whole having three of everything, what about the niece? Will she be sitting on the floor? Does she not need cutlery?
It seems all set up around his mum. I think I’d have to leave a parting message about how strange it is there are no pictures of him, his sister and his niece....
And have a great Christmas!! Spoil yourself xx

Well done OP!

He and his family sound like a nightmare and you'll never get any peace because there will always be something you're not doing right or some slight they perceive you've done with no way of you knowing what you're doing wrong until it's too late and they're telling you off.

They are odd. They have things that are acceptable to them which wouldn't be acceptable to me. And some of them I personally couldn't live with. My DH's parents are a bit odd in their ways but I've either mentioned it politely so they've changed, ignored it so it doesn't bother me or avoid occasions altogether where their oddness makes me feel uncomfortable.

Great decision OP. They all, sound like a bunch of grabby weirdos.

Well done OP.

However, a little too early in the morning to be reading that they ate the shank you had been sucking on. 🤮

Peasants is right.