What do I do about MIL this Xmas after last year's drama??

[Itsme93]

Hey all,
I've currently got the boyf of 2 years asking me what I'm going to get his parents for Xmas.
I wouldn't usually mind as I love Xmas & buying presents however last year I had a few problems....

1. I bought his parents a fancy coffee machine as they love coffee but strangely enough they never bought themselves one so I thought, great gift. A few days after Xmas, the boyf said his mother was not happy because I 'showed her up'. I asked him how? Apparently my present was too grand as she had only bought me a size 8 crop top (which I think was a recycled present as its definitely not my style and I'm a size 12 - before anyone jumps on this about accidental wrong sizing, his mum is fully aware I'm not a size 8 nor would I ever wear a crop top!) I said it was fab etc thanks so much on the day though.
2. instead of buying his sister, I bought gifts for her little girl instead. Apparently MIL was not impressed by that and that I should have got his sister something.
3. one of the gifts I got his neice was a rocking horse which the little girl loved and Xmas day wouldn't get off it. MIL was not happy that my gift overshadowed hers and said 'I wish this gift had been from me'.
4. last Xmas I bought boyf an updated ipad as his had broken, within 6 weeks he gave it to his sister because the mother said the neice would like it to play games on. I wasn't impressed and said I'd rather have it back. Boyf still gave it to the niece

I rarely see any of his family, find them quite socially inept however I am happy to get them something. I told boyf for him to sort it out this year but he wants to do it seperately and with already asking me what I'm getting them all, he's obviously got expectations which has actually p*ssed me right off.

Do I finish with him lol I really feel like he's part of the problem and I'm fed up of these expectations of me having to impress his family like I'm not good enough, as that's how I feel.... Or do I act like nothing and just do vouchers?

Cinema tickets for the sister and kids. One adult however many child. They can go out together to see what ever suits them. His parents something for the coffee machine like refills, a set of mugs something like that. Alternatively ditch the lot of them and buy yourself a nice outfit that you like in your actual size. X

@Lulualla
Yes, you definitely are being a snog (!). I have a Dulce Gusto coffee machine with the pods and it is the best coffee EVER. I would rather have that over Starbucks, Costa or any of the posh coffees (the latte macchiato is my favourite).

He sounds like a game-playing twat and personally I'd tell him where to stick it but if you are intending on staying with him first off I'd say 'waiting to see what you get first so let me know when you're sorted'. Aaaaand then make home made hampers and fill them with wee chocs, daft stuff but they look nice and not too expensive.

Finfintytint

Just give them a box of Quality Street and remove all the purple ones.

YOU are my favourite person! This is a great idea! 😆

Sounds like you already have your answer. Go with your gut 😊

After last years out burst. Theyd be getting something from The Poundland and liking it.

If you've seen the Gavin and Stacey Christmas special, you could take a leaf out of Nessa and Dave's book and give them one random chocolate each from a box of Celebrations...

Can you ask him what the budget is per gift? That might give you an idea. He can then ask them what their budget is for you. No need for awkwardness at all.

No gifts to be exchanged this year, don’t buy for ingrates

I would tell him to buy for his family & you buy for yours. They sound like ungrateful, greedy fuckers.

Just going against the grain a little here on the joint presents. Unless you live together I wouldn’t be giving joint presents.

You went over the top last Christmas, there were embarrassed but ungrateful.

I would be most hurt by the boyfriend giving away your lovely gift.

Walk away. He isn’t worth it and he will never be on your side.

Many thanks for the responses.
Ended up having a blazing row about it.
Found out sister sold the ipad a few months back. I won't say what I think of this as I'm sure I'll be accused of being arrogant again and some tosh about social status (thanks @B9ddy)
Boyfriend said his mums getting me something 'really nice' so I said, 'is that coffee machine nice or crop top nice, just so i don't offend again this year?' he then decided to tell me that his mums told him not to spend loads of money on me this year.
He has kicked off that I don't make effort with his family or neice... I said 'I'm damned if I do, damned if I don't. Why don't you get them presents and put my name on it with yours?' He said his mums told him what to get her and his sister already and ' why would I do that?' About putting my name on the tag so I just told him to F off and I'm done. I cannot stand the whining about how he feels all the time over trivial shit and I'm certainly not goin to go out of my way to impress that old bag he has for a mother like I'm looking for acceptance.
Thank you all for your time lol

What did he buy your mum last year?

Haha well done op, this is such weird behaviour from them, they sound grabby and pathetic. A MIL like that would be horrendous but even worse is his behaviour in this scenario. Spend your money on yourself and your family this Christmas!

You need to get rid of the boyfriend.

Sold the iPad!! And he’s dragging you over the coals?

He’s a true mummies boys isn’t he?

Dump him plz!! His mother and sister will continuously interfere in your lives and he will never stand up for you as he sees nothing wrong with it. The selling IPad shows how grabby they are but what is more worrying is his attitude. Bin him before marriage and children come along. Can you imagine your child carrying such genes and traits!

Flowers @fedup21

Are you ok?
As long as you’ve made or are able to make a clean break-I’d stick to it!
Have a lovely Christmas with your friends and family. I’d rather find a soup kitchen or the like to spend Christmas Day in, if he is an only option. You sound lovely, and others would have tripped over themselves to say thanks, or quietly said you didn’t have to, “it’s too much!” in the polite way.
They’re a bunch of takers (that hand out shit on purpose) that you never have to see again.
He just sounds rude. They all do. 💐

If he got your mum flowers, why can’t you get his mum the same? Apologies if I’ve missed anyone asking that.

What good qualities does this guy have? Everything you’ve said about him just sounds so self centered and he’s so under the thumb of a mother who isn’t very nice to you. I hope he’s an excellent lover, amazing cook, and does all your laundry. There has to be some reason to put up with him.

Well done, OP.

They sound like cheap, money-grabbing arses, the lot of them.

I'm sure you'll have a much better Christmas without them.

RUN!!! Get out while you can!
He and his whole family sound like a lifetime of unhappiness!!
Cut your loses and enjoy your Christmas with your own family who would appreciate a gift!!

I really do believe they are grabby. He told me a while back infront if his mum that she takes his new clothes out of his wardrobe and sells them online and his mum laughed like there was nothing wrong with that.
Also noticed very strange behaviour....
They only have framed pictures of the mum in the house, only 3 pictures, other than that the house is quite bare. None of the grand daughter.
There's only 3 knives and 3 forks in the drawer (is that so guests won't stay for dinner?)
and boyfriend told me his mum had a row recently with a shop that she only wanted 3 chairs with her new dining table, not 4 and should be given a discount for only having 3.
A month or two ago, I was at his and we got take away, only half eaten as sister called asking him to pick up niece from nursery so I went with him. We left our food in the fridge with our knives and forks on the plates as we were rushing out, came back an hour later, his mum and sister were eating my lamb shank with my teeth marks in that I'd been sucking the bone of with our used knives and forks off the same plates - is that not strange?
Am I a snob for thinking this is all weird behaviour? I'd never say it to him but it's crossed my mind.

I'm sorry but his family behaviour will of rubbed off on your partner. I would be running now before things get anymore serious. Imagine having kids around them?