To say sod it and actually go and help children who need it!!

[SimpleSaying1]

I run a Beaver scout group. When it started there was a great understanding from parents that this was a community thing and parents regularly volunteered and helped out. I was involved as my kids both went through and then I stayed on. As it has grown it has become a really popular and active group, with a big waiting list. But the generation of parents who grew it with me have moved on and it has left this really entitled and difficult bunch of parents who seem to think it is a service they are paying for and have no involvement. I struggle week on week to have enough leaders. The only person who really helps is my son who I helped start it for his peers and is now older!! This week I cancelled an event because after asking numerous times no one would help and I didn't have safe ratios. The ONLY comments I got were angry at me for messing up childcare planning and parents demanding part of their subs back because the session didn't run that week!!! I'm a good scout leader, I do a lot for the kids and I love it but even they seem to have a different attitude now. The area has become increasingly wealthy and I feel more and more that I'm providing after-school childcare rather than a meaningful activity that enriches children's lives. In another local town which is really much more deprived they are starting another group, they've got lots of parents volunteers and need an experienced leader. I am so, so tempted to jack it in with the group I've got (it would only carry on if a parent then picked it up) and go and work with this other group?

Yanbu.
It is a massive undertaking to run a group like this, especially as a volunteer.

Based on what you've said here I'd go for the other group... You can give them notice that you're leaving and if nobody takes over it's closing.

Definitely go to the other group. And in your letter tell them why in a polite and matter of fact way.

I would also go for the other group. I volunteered as a scout leader for a few years as my own kids were in the group & I felt I should help. Like you, the parents would text abuse if we couldn’t run for whatever reason but would refuse to help us. It’s very disheartening.
I say let them sort their own children & you move to the other group where you’ll be appreciated.

Well beavers etc are something that parents pay for their children to attend? It’s not free.

My daughter did brownies for a couple of years and I would drop and run, unpaid my fees on time and sent her with whatever they asked me to, that’s my job done as far as I’m concerned.

• I paid

How about proposing changing to a Saturday morning. The beavers I am a leader of is on Saturdays and we find it easier to get helpers if required. We do every other week too

I'm always really grateful for our brownie and guide leaders but when I signed dc up I had no intention of helping out at sessions. I have 3 dc, work full time and volunteer as a school Governor.

I'd never be rude and absolutely appreciate the leaders are volunteers but your expectation that parents should take turns to help perhaps needs to be mentioned clearly when dc sign up. If be quite annoyed if this was our guide leader ranting on mn. My experience of guiding (used to be a young leader years ago) was and is that outside trips the leaders ask for helpers or one off when a leader was having an op so parents were asked but overall the guiding community from other groups supported rather than random parents who might be really uncomfortable with helping.

However, rudeness is not okay!

God I wouldn’t even give ‘notice’ you are a volunteer. I would post a cheery note to the effect that the recent decline in parental support means that the club is no longer viable so has ended as of last week. That as a volunteer you have no interest in responding to complaints about events not running when it’s the lack of parents willing or able to help that make the situation unresolvable. Wishing you all a happy Halloween and 🥳
You could also say there will be other groups whose waiting lists your children can join or if someone wants to step forward to run this group you are happy to share any useful information .

Seriously life is too short to enable other people’s’ inflated expectations and rudeness.

@Jaynetheplane you will have paid pennies. Subs barely cover the materials etc needed to run the group. The leaders time is "free".

Go. And tell them why.

You do this for the DC, not the parents. Don't let the parents' attitude spoil things.
I suggest that you let the DC know that the unit might be closing because there aren't enough parent helpers and let pester-power do the rest. If that fails then go and help the other group.

As an ex-scout&guide-parent, may I say that I really appreciated what the Movement did for my DC. Thank you.

Is it because more parents are working now so have less flexibility to volunteer for stuff like this? What do they say when asked to help?

It is something you pay for yes Jayne, but subs just covers the costs of running the group. All the adults are volunteers, who give up their time freely, not only to run the group itself but also to plan and undertake training too.

I am a Scout leader too and there is no way I would put up with the abuse!

When my children attended scouts and guides, there was a parent rota and every parent had to sign up to help at different slots at the beginning of term.

I hear what you are saying, and there is no excuse for people being rude and abusive to you. You are doing a great thing, and parents should understand and appreciate that.

However, I agree with the above poster that Beavers / cubs etc is perceived as a drop and leave group, where sessions are facilitated by the leaders. We used to attend Woodcraft groups, but switched to cubs partly because I wasn't able to provide the parental input that Woodcraft demanded. In the years that my DC's attended cubs, I didn't once get asked to help out. I paid, I dropped, I collected. Nothing was needed from me except my money, and being able to drop them at the various places that they had their groups, camps etc. To me that's normal for cubs, brownies etc.

Oh without a doubt move on, how much notice you give them is up to you, you can hold your head high regardless.

I’m not saying anyone should put up with abuse, I certainly wouldn’t, but I don’t get why you should expect help from the parents to do something that you have chosen to do know that your giving up your time for free? Its nice if people offer but you sound like you expect it.

(Oh and I know that the subs I paid was to cover room hire etc and that the leaders didn't get paid)

I would join the other group and let the parents know that the current group will close unless someone comes forward to take it over.

I would explain that you started the group with a like-minded group of parents of beavers-aged children and that you hope that similar parents will come forward to whom you'd be very happy to show the ropes.

Yanbu and to be honest, I would jack in the entitled group and work with those in the deprived area.

Attitudes like jayneheplane and the parents at your club op are what you're fighting against. They just don't get it

I have a lot of time for people who do these clubs, run by volunteers and generally at a reduced rate to other clubs aimed at children. It's not the same as paying for after school club or swimming lessons where you pay for a service.

I have helped on occasion and enjoyed it but dont want to do it full time. Go to the other group op.

jaynetheplane The subs you pay are nowhere near the commercial cost of what you are getting. Without the goodwill of all the many volunteers, both the ones you see, and the ones supporting behind the scenes, there is no way that Beavers could be offered to you child for what you are paying. The vast majority of those volunteers are also working parents as well.

SimplySaying1 it sounds like you have done a great job for many years but it has to work for you as well as the young people. If moving to a different Group will keep you involved and happier in your role that is the right thing to do.

Damn right move!

I’d make the move in a heartbeat. And I would very clearly explain why too. Let us know how you get on.

It’s absolutely spot on, the sense of entitlement from some parents is staggering.

I’m not a scout leader but similar and in the last few years it has felt more and more like we are unpaid childcare. Parents genuinely forget that we give up our time for free, that we work and have families too, and that we’re often sacrificing time with our children to lead activities for theirs.

I would post something to n your group’s social media along the lines of

“With great sadness I have to announce that a continuing lack of helpers means the group is at risk of closing.

If additional volunteers cannot be found before x date we will have no alternative but to close the group.

If you are I retested in helping out please contact xxxxx’