...to buy radar key online to use disabled loo?

[Marigo]

I’m not disabled and neither are any of my children, however I’m often out with my 3 under 2.5 and in our local shopping centre loos there’s no toilet in the baby change. The ladies is impossible with double buggy plus buddy board and the disabled requires a radar key. Same for the loos in the two big department stores so I just can’t go out into town unless it’s the weekend and my husband can come in case I need a wee! I’m struggling to leave the house for this stress but my mom is disabled and I know how shit it is when she can’t use the large cubicle she needs. I’m really conflicted about what to do.

Sure, we might have to wait for the disabled person in there before us, but the more people using it, the higher the risk of waiting is.

If you aren't disabled, and if it isn't a shared baby change/disabled facility (and don't get me started on those, stores should be providing BOTH not mashing the two together!).. stay out of it!

Ive got a Radar key from Amazon. I’m not disabled, but at the time was having medical issues badly affecting continence so often needed the loo in a hurry.

It’s largely been resolved by surgery.

I still have the key, but while I rarely use it, at times I still need the loo in a hurry and will use it then.

For all you know it could be someone with a disability in there before you so guilt tripping isnt really the best tactic here.
We accept that, but why increase the odds against us by using these loos if you don't need them?

For all you know it could be someone with a disability in there before you so guilt tripping isnt really the best tactic here.
This is true. But it stands to reason that if only people with disabilities use them then they won't be so busy. If all and sundry use them they're likely to be always occupied aren't they?

Hedgehog you can agree all you like but accessible toilets do not mean that they are accessible to all. Apart from that, those of us with other disabilities and severe continence issues disagree with you.

@viciousjacdaw

This. Totally agree!!

YABVVVU OP

For all you know it could be someone with a disability in there before you so guilt tripping isnt really the best tactic here.

And people like the OP who think that having children makes them entitled to use disabled facilities will make it all the harder for those with invisible disabilities because when so many people start abusing facilities it makes everyone suspicious sadly

Message deleted by Mumsnet.

(thought I'd just save you the time, mnhq!)

Could you sell your big buggy and get a second hand smaller one which will fit in the ladies?

and don't get me started on those, stores should be providing BOTH not mashing the two together

Some of us need a baby change facility in the accsessable toilet

I agree that buying a key is completely unreasonable and non disabled people shouldnt use the disabled toilets if they cant help it but to those saying that they are going to have an accident and blaming it on a non disabled person using the disabled bathroom is a bit over the top. For all you know it could be someone with a disability in there before you so guilt tripping isnt really the best tactic here.

Except this thread is specifically about a person who doesn't have a disability buying a key so they can use facilities provided for disabled people. Standing in increasing pain waiting for another disabled person to come out is unavoidable. Standing in increasing pain while someone entitled like the OP uses them is entirely avoidable, she thinks her convenience is more important than my pain. And as a regular user of disabled toilets I can hand on heart tell you that I can always tell when it's someone taking the piss. It's written all over their faces when they realise they've been spotted.

I don’t think I’m entitled and I haven’t done it so far. It’s more of a WWYD I suppose.

YABVU

If you see somebody heading towards the toilet that you guess needs it more than you do, then wait till they’re done

How do you guess? My dad doesn’t have a big sign over his head stating “I am a catheter user”

My son doesn’t have a sign above his head stating “my disability mean I have no sense I need the toilet to the last minute and I need help to go even though I am 10”

Women with young kids seem to have been managing to shop without pissing themselves in the street for the last several decades, so I'm not quite sure why you're any different.

She has twin babies for goodness sake, and another child. If ever there was a need for someone to use a disabled loo for a quick wee, this is it. Double buggies dont fit through thin toilet doors, and doubt the on line ones do either.

Lets turn the tables a bit. Imagine someone who doesn't have children parking in the parent and child space because the space is bigger and easier to pull into and they are a bit tired and its closer to the door, shopping centre etc. How annoyed would you be? How many threads have we seen where people have complained over misused parent and child parking spots. Then imagine some poor soul with kidney disease or Chrons disease having to wait because the disabled toilets are being used by an able bodied person?

@Tabbymumz since when does having three children make you disabled? The only people using accessible toilets ever is disabled people.

Should say should be disabled people.

The difference is, when people park, they could be there for hours, in this instance, she could be a few minutes and could make sure noone is waiting or in sight.

Disabled toilets ( or accessible toilets), aren't just for people in wheelchairs or people who can't get in to a regular cubicle.
My daughter has Crohn's disease and when she needs to go it's NOW.
My friend has just had treatment for anal cancer and when she needs to go it's NOW.
They both have cards to show if there's a queue that says 'please allow me to go ahead of you due to my illness, which means I need the toilet urgently' but access to the disabled loo is far preferable.
I'd say don't do it.

poor OP, how unfair that she can't use something that is there for disabled people. poor jealous thing.

YABU

TabbyMumz - her 'quick wee' could mean people like my friend soiling herself - it's selfish - she doesn't need it.

if it's a quick wee then leaving the kids for 2 mins wont hurt either

Knifeangel....what on earth is she supposed to do with two babies and a toddler. Leave them outside? Carry them in and put them on the toilet floor?