What is your honest view about only children??

[Charley1988]

My view is that being an only child can POTENTIALLY be a great experience and that all the well known stereotypes of only children are a complete MYTH. The only POTENTIAL downside in my opinion is that an only child may SOMETIMES be more prone to a more rigid upbringing than someone with siblings - but please note I've put the most important words in this sentence in block capitals....

I definitely don't think a child needs siblings but bring one of a large family can POTENTIALLY be a good experience as well of course

Is being an only child a thing?

I think that any number of children can potentially be great or can sometimes be awful. Please bear in mind that some of us don’t get a choice about the number of children we have and insinuating that somehow single children are more vulnerable or odd in some way isn’t helpful. And please don’t say you aren’t insinuating negative stereotypes because I think your tone does, why else would you start this thread.

I think it is none elses business. It isn't always a matter of choice and if it is it,s the parents choice. If you want a big family great if you want a small family great.

Im pregnant with my 1st and (at the moment) dont intend on having another. I dont think we could afford it for one reason, and I refuse to scrape by in life for the sake of having another child just because everyone thinks just having one child is bad.

Its about upbringing and experiences. People that say only children are 'selfish' or 'spoilt' or 'lonely' etc are mainly talking about the upbringing they've had, they're not describing the side effects of being an only child.

My dd is probably going to be an only child (due to repeat MCs) and I'm worried that she's going to be loved too fiercely/ not have any healthy sibling competition to convince her that she's not the Second Coming. So as a result, will either end up on Love Island or a weird 44year old who wears matching knitwear with her bff mum.

My honest opinion of them is that they are children who do not have any siblings.

People do apparently have hardcore FEELINGS about this though, I was told by a work colleague while engaged to my now DH that I couldn't possibly marry him because we were both only children and this would amount to actual cruelty to any future children. She felt VERY strongly about it. It was straight up bonkers.

I liked being an only child. My husband did also, although says he probably would have had a better childhood with siblings to split his mother's disappointment. For me only child + single mum was great.

My son is an only, likely to remain so as DH doesn't want another. There are significant financial advantages to just having one I suppose but I haven't really put too much thought into it.

I'm an only child and really enjoyed my childhood. I was very close to my Mum and have good memories of living with my parents. We lived in a small ish 2 bedroom house and I loved the freedom of having my own room.

I'd say I have a very good imagination as I was used to playing on my own.

One thing I would say though now as an adult is that when my Mum died suddenly when I was 18, my relationship with my Dad became toxic as he couldn't cope anymore.

I don't know why my parents just had me, would love to know the reason why. Often wonder if they couldn't afford it or struggled to convince. I'll never know the answer.

From a selfish point of view now I'd love a brother or sister to share my memories with. I feel very lonely and lack family support.

What's your experience of it, OP.?
Because I'm the only child of an only child with an only child.
So not POTENTIALLY or SOMETIMES, but me, my Dad and my daughter, are all just people. Sociable (when we feel like it) happy in our own skin, and no hangups whatsoever about being only children.
Oh, and dd, lying on the bed next to me is laughing at the notion that her upbringing might be rigid.

I think they have different personalities like any other child with sibs.

My honest view is I don’t have one. At all. What someone else chooses to do is really up to them. My sister in law is an only child and she’s pretty normal - she’s got three kids though.

I would’ve been happy with one. She would’ve had a lot including pretty overwhelming attention but I think she would’ve been lucky

However I have siblings, and didn’t want my child to miss out on having them. If I’d been an only child I wouldn’t know any different

That said, I have 2 children and never been broody so haven’t really felt a longing for children people get

I think it depends on how the child is raised by the parents.
I've known some horrendously spoilt horrible only children and then I've known so truely gracious lovely only children. I think the thing I found hardest is watching one of my oldest friends who is an only child have to take on the burden of burying both his parents within a few years of each other in his 30's and he was alone.
It was a lot for him to deal with, he had good friends around him but it makes me feel so sad for him.

Honestly my DP's were both only children, it didn't improve either of them.
But that is just my individual experience of them as parents and partners. I think as individuals they were both happy enough.

I was an only child.
I was brought up in a working class environment . Lived in a council house , mum worked as well but was home when I came home from school . I was loved but not spoilt , my father was quite strict, mum not so much .
Did I ever feel lonely ? Honest answer a few times . For example unless my parents were able to, or I had friends around there is no one to play board games with or imaginary play .
You do learn to be fairly independent, which I think is a good thing . I'm ok in my own company. I'm not shy and will speak up for myself when required . I'm quite a people pleaser because I think you learn to to attract people towards you.
Having said all that, when I had children of my own , I didn't want an only.

Most siblings hate eachother.

Get a grip.

I think being an only child could be great or terrible depending on your parents.(same can be said for kids with siblings)

My view is each to their own - please note I have not used capitals, italics or any such in my response as I’m just not that patronising

I never felt lonely. I had a playstation.

We are having only one by choice and I was an only too. I don't really care what other people do. I had a great childhood, my DD will too, and that's that 🤷‍♀️

Some of my children’s friends are only children. Personally I find their parents quite pushy in thinking my kids are there to entertain theirs with play dates and outings.

I have 3 and they entertain each other, but parents of single children seem to think mine should go on weekends away so Billy has a friend or Sandra has a bestie to play with.

I think it’s better than having siblings you don’t get on with but being an only child must be lonely at times. We are having a second DC me because as one of three kids I can’t imagine a childhood without my siblings I loved having them. And DH because as an only child he’d never want DD to be one as he always wanted siblings. Obviously it isn’t possible for everyone for many reasons but for people with the freedom of choice they often seem to have more than one.

My partner is an only child. One of my cousin is. they have both turned into well-rounded individuals and my partner has some really close friends he calls brothers.

I'm a twin and I love my sister more than anything, don't know what I would do without her.

Not sure I've made a point here but what I'm trying to say is that everyone has the potential of a good experience, doesn't matter if you're a sibling or on your own.

I think it's just as common to see spoilt children who have siblings as those who don't.

I am one. I wouldn’t have it any other way. I’m no different to anyone else who has siblings