Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Absolutely terrified about starting new job ,can't stop crying and shaking.don't know what to do.

194 replies

linnyb71 · 10/10/2019 09:28

This is my first time posting so don't know if I'm in the right place. But I just need some help.I've had a really bad year,got made redundant from a job I loved, got another one but it was awful as I was being bullied ,stuck it out for 6 months but couldnt take anymore and left and got another job which I thought would be better for me as it was quite similar to the job I got made redundant from but it wasn't. It was horrendous. So here I am just about to start yet another job this afternoon and I don't think I can do it.the thing is I'd be letting people down if I don't go.also there's the financial implications. I'm so lost just feel like running far away.I'm in a terrible state.I don't even know why I posted this here,just wanted someone to talk to I guess.any help would be very welcome right now.I had a breakdown once before due to work and I'm heading the same way again.what shall I do?

OP posts:
fedupntired · 10/10/2019 17:14

Just found your thread and wanted to add my good luck wishes Thanks

Dyrne · 10/10/2019 17:15

We’re all rooting for you! Just take it a bit at a time, as others have said. You will feel so bloody accomplished when you’ve done it!!!

angieloumc · 10/10/2019 17:19

Thinking of you OP. Anxiety can be crippling and waiting to start work this evening must have been really difficult. Hopefully you are there now and all is going well.

Giraffe888 · 10/10/2019 17:30

Good luck from me too! Hope it’s going ok

WellThisIsShit · 10/10/2019 19:26

I have my fingers crossed for you!

nonevernotever · 10/10/2019 19:44

And another good luck from me.

Horsemad · 10/10/2019 19:53

Aaah, this is a lovely thread 🙂 everyone's been so helpful and given you loads to think about.

I hope your first shift has gone well OP.

NoSquirrels · 10/10/2019 20:11

ASmallBox I am not a particularly anxious person either, but driving a bigger, unfamiliar car is a big source of stress for me - we had a hire car recently that was HUGE and luxurious in comparison to our car and I have never been so relieved to hand it back! Everyone kept saying how lovely it must be to drive it - I was just in a permanent state of stress taking it anywhere.

I have also been a bit rundown recently and my resilience is low - I had a day recently where I felt physically sick all day because of a work thing. Once it was over I was absolutely fine.

It’s important to recognise when a few early nights and taking the pressure off in other other areas of life will fix it, or if there’s something else going on that needs some help. Nothing at all wrong with medication.

It is World Mental Health Day today, linny. There’s so many, many people out there struggling in one way or another.

Even if you didn’t make it through this shift (although I really hope you did!) it will be OK, because you know you need some help and you’ll get that now.

ongranaryplease · 10/10/2019 22:47

Been thinking of you all evening OP. I take it you’ve finished by now? Smile I hope everything went ok. We are all proud of you Flowers

Dyrne · 10/10/2019 22:57

Hey Linny , I hope the shift went well!

MojitoMojitoo · 10/10/2019 22:59

I hope it wasn't as bad as you thought it would be once you were there 😊

Fiveletters · 10/10/2019 23:07

Well done for going. I hope it went well Flowers

goodwinter · 10/10/2019 23:27

Hope all went ok for you!

NoSquirrels · 10/10/2019 23:50

Just checking in as promised, and wishing you a good night's sleep, linny.

Original poster
linnyb71 · 11/10/2019 00:21

Hi everybody,got home just under an hour ago.it went well.everyone was really friendly and supportive. Shift leader was lovely and told me not to worry about anything just to ask anyone if I needed help.he took me to the self service checkouts and stayed with me for a bit showing me what to do.Then he went off to do something and left me to it.But the security guy was there with me to show me anything I got stuck on.the time flew by.they said I did well.and my facing was beautiful apparently lol.feel so much better.but I'm still gonna go to the docs and have a chat and say what's been going on with me lately.I definitely need something to calm my nerves.was weird really cos once I got stuck in to what I was doing the nerves didn't completely disappear but I was able to push them away a bit.thankyou so much to everyone for their support ,love and understanding. It means a lot to me.love you all.one shift down,3 more to go.one of the ladies at work said to me don't be scared we are all here to help each other.that was nice.so all in all,I feel proud of myself for making it through today and hopefully tomorrow I won't be as nervous.thank you all again. Xxx

OP posts:
Divebar · 11/10/2019 00:25

Well done linny. Sounds like the best possible start x

Original poster
linnyb71 · 11/10/2019 00:29

A smallboxof chocolatebunnies.bless you.that's exactly how I felt. Said to my daughter before I went to work that I wanted to run away. I was crippled by fear and didn't think I'd even make it there, I texted her when I was on my way there saying I want to get off this bus and come home.I'm glad I didn't now.really feel like I've achieved something today. And so have you by getting behind the wheel of that big car.a big pat on the back to us both .and to everyone out there who is struggling with their mental health.you are all amazing,xx

OP posts:
dreichsky · 11/10/2019 00:55

That was a great update OP. Well done for pushing through.

I also hate changing cars, when I arrived in the USA and they gave me car the size of a tank I wanted to cry.
A couple of years on we are doing fine together!

Original poster
linnyb71 · 11/10/2019 01:03

Aww dreichsky. Thankyou so much.and well done to you for taming your beast of a car .xx and to nosquirrels.thankyou for everything,sweet dreams to you too.goodnight all.I'm gonna keep pushing through.xxx

OP posts:
Millennial · 11/10/2019 01:13

Well done.

You are certainly not alone when it comes to the anxiety of starting a new job. I hoe the job is a wonderful new start for you!

Catsandchardonnay · 11/10/2019 01:20

Wow linny I’ve just discovered your thread and want to say absolutely fantastically well done you! You faced your fears and conquered them. What an amazing story for world mental health day. You’re an inspiration! Glad to hear your new colleagues are nice, that really makes all the difference. Good luck with the job going forwards Flowers

IsobelRae23 · 11/10/2019 02:45

@linnyb71 You done amazing, well done!

I used to delivering training, and the amount of people that I had on courses who were scared incase they had to answer questions, stand up in front of people etc, were so many in numbers that I lost count! And frequently people would say ‘I could never do what you do every day, it must be so scary!’ And I used to smile and say ‘it is at first but you get used to it’.

What they didn’t know and I didn’t know at the time, was I had generalised anxiety disorder and bipolar. I used to vomit and have an upset tummy almost every morning before work, for over 6 years, with nerves, I couldn’t eat throughout the day as I would be sick, and many nights were sleepless as I worried about work the next day. So why did I do it? Because once I’d started each day I enjoyed it! But I could never get over that nervous feeling. In reality I should have sought help sooner! So please do, and don’t think twice about it.

Baileyscheesecake · 11/10/2019 03:30

What an amazing achievement! Well done. Sending you flowers Flowers Give yourself a great big pat on the back. Wishing you lots of happiness and success for your future.

Iflyaway · 11/10/2019 04:07

Wow Peridot!

I was just going to come on and recommend Bach Rescue Remedy, I swear by it.
You can get it in Boots.

They have cream/gel too which is brilliant for cuts, grazes, etc. Brilliant to have in the house with kids.

Piffle11 · 11/10/2019 04:23

I am SO pleased that you went to your shift - well done!