To be annoyed by commuters ignoring 'baby on board'?

[puffingalong]

I think the title summarises my gripe. The baby on board badge is not really working (sometimes it does, but not at rush hour and not the majority of the time). I could believe that the badge isn't noticeable enough, I don't think it's difficult in my case when you include my ginormous bump (I'm 7 months and my bump is on the large side, the rest of me pretty small).

In my experience, the majority of people sitting in the seats for disabled/pregnant/elderly people just don't bother looking up to check if anyone else needs those seats more than them.

I know I could ask for a seat but I'm too British! Has anyone found any fun shaming tactics for this situation?

Just ask nicely. It may not be obvious that you are pregnant, or people may be wary of offending you (in case you are just fat!), or they may also be in need of the seat.

'Shaming' them' will just cause offence and/or embarrassment to you and them.

Just say excuse me and point to the badge. Not hard.

I think it would be AWESOME for TFL to design a badge to to worn by those with invisible disabilities! So that everybody knows they are entitled to that seat and they aren’t subjected to frustrated pregnant women/ visibly disabled people shaming them!
It’s nobody’s fault but it’s a horrible position to be in, being shamed, glared at or muttered about!

Haven't RTFT but I work on London Underground. I regularly put visually impaired passengers on tubes, and I find that by saying to the ignorant ones "you wouldn't mind getting up so that this gentleman/lady can sit, would you?" And there you provoke their shame.
When I was pregnant, I did the same thing for myself when needed. It gets easier to say, the more you do it.

I find that by saying to the ignorant ones "you wouldn't mind getting up so that this gentleman/lady can sit, would you?" And there you provoke their shame

Why would this provoke shame? If you said this to me I'd happily give up.my seat but I wouldn't be ashamed of having not looked up and seen someone else needing a seat.

Just say excuse me and point to the badge. Not hard

Or just be a grown up and say, "excuse me would you mind if I sit down" and don't passive aggressively point to a badge

In my many years of commuting I have never seen a situation where a pregnant woman needing a seat was not offered one (and it only happened once to me when I was pregnant). You might need to ask for a seat initially as people may not realise but it is actually really heartening to see people's responses and restores my faith more than a little! So to repeat what PP have said; you just need to ask and don't feel embarrassed doing it!

And I just remembered one occasion when I was offered a seat when wearing a fairly clingy dress and I must obviously have been standing sticking my belly out. I just mumbled 'no it's ok thank you anyway' and didn't have the heart to say I wasn't actually pregnant!

@disneymademedoit

I think it would be AWESOME for TFL to design a badge to to worn by those with invisible disabilities! So that everybody knows they are entitled to that seat and they aren’t subjected to frustrated pregnant women/ visibly disabled people shaming them!

These already exist - think they've been around a couple of years now.

TFL Please offer me a seat badge
Tfl make announcements at stations " Please be aware of other passengers around you and offer them a seat if they need it more than you do]]

Use your communication skills like everyone else and don’t be so lazy and precious that you need a badge to do the talking for you

“I’m feeling a bit queasy, can anybody let me sit please?”
Watch them all jump up 🤓

Really wouldn't make shame tactics, imagine what a tit you would look in front of the carriage if they had an invisible disability and could have avoided it by simply asking politely.

My fun shaming tactic didn’t work. 7 months pregnant - big old family got on with me elbowing people out of the way their kids could get a seat.

I managed to get one next to the father who placed his briefcase over the armrest in the seat I was in🤔.

Tight fit! I was huge and sharing a seat with his briefcase.

I was doing the sighing /eye rolling thing and all eyes on me. His bag was pressing badly in my bump so gave up and got up.

He asked me if I was ok, I said ‘yes, I’m fine but clearly your briefcase is so exhausted and needs it’s own seat’.

Those nearby laughed - he nodded in agreement! 🤣🤣🤣😂😂😂 oh dear.

I’ve always found other parents the worst.

Why did you put up with that though?! You should have just asked him to move it.

For fear of insulting a fat unpregnant lady unless people see your badge I don’t think you’ll be offered your seat. Plus people today are selfish a holes and don’t offer seats to disable or elderly people either!

@DisneyMadeMeDoIt

There is a scheme here

Too british ...but you think shaming people is more acceptable than being open and honest
The only shame is on you

Ask for a seat. I did it for 9 months.
Passive aggressiveness gets you nowhere

I hope you learned your lesson OP. Don't dare be flippant on Mumsnet. It's an extremely serious forum.

You have got to get a grip about asking for help ... otherwise you are bringing up your baby to be a wimp

Just ask. I regularly miss my stop because I am day dreaming or engrossed in my book - I am definitely not on high alert for your badge.

Just ask, I'm disabled and have a TFL 'offer me a seat' badge but on my bad days really don't need it! No one ever refuses but I always ask a group (as before I had a badge I would feel like a right dick and used hate the dirty looks from everyone in the carriage after refusing someone a seat but genuinely wouldn't have been to stand) never been refused. I always find its teenagers (particularly boys) who jump first, then women and lastly middle aged men (quite often in cycling gear).

You've got a huge bump and a tongue in your mouth to talk with, you don't need a magic badge 🙄.

Drives me nuts how this generation can't just talk to other human beings!!

Just ask - people just have head down not noticing things mentality I think for the vast majority they would be very happy to give up seat if they realised !