Women were asked what they would do if men had to be in by 9

[Pieceofpurplesky]

AIBU that the answers to this make me really sad

www.thepoke.co.uk/2018/10/01/women-imagine-life-men-9pm-curfew-eye-opener/2/

www.thepoke.co.uk/2018/10/01/women-imagine-life-men-9pm-curfew-eye-opener/2/

Sorry if this has been done

With respect this thread is about the Shit that Happens to Women but feel free to start another about that other stuff.

WOMen HELp change violence against them by how they raise their children, expecting that boys will be kind and caring and respectful , not tolerating “boys will be boys” as an excuse for bad behaviour

Then By fighting poverty and giving all children a valued place in society, eg something to feel part of that isn’t a gang

By not setting up a them and us mentality between men and women. SO THat men see women as human like them. WORKIng with men who understand and respect the biological differences and who don’t see that as hateful to men

I have never been assaulted or threatened by men either. As ridiculous as a man curfew sound, it wouldn't make any difference anyway, some women can be just as vicious and dangerous.

Ask anyone who had done time in a women's jail if a female world is so much fun.

This ^
People who can say this are just as entitled to state their opinion as people who have. Doesn't make it any less valid just because people's experiences are different.
Also, if you want to start looking at statistics, start looking at the victims of knife crime. Start looking at the victims of people getting 'beaten up' in the City Centres at night.
Then separate out all the domestic violence that occurs and rapes within a family or within a relationship. Awful. I wish a whole lot more were done and more support given and that there were more convictions and more severe sentences. Not minimising this at all however a 9pm curfew wouldn't help any of this.

There are issues out there for young men, as well as women. I don't worry anymore about my dds than I do about my ds.

I think a 9pm curfew would be incredibly negative, why should half my friends nad people I spend time with be demonised because of a minority ?

Most women who are assaulted are assaulted by men they know and/or live with. I would imagine that the type of man who hates women would be even more aggressive behind closed doors in such a situation.

I read it that JacquesHammer was making the point that women can't change male violence, Changestartsnow.

When did victims become responsible for fixing bullies?

The responses on this thread demonstrate the problem; you can't fix male violence because you can't admit it happens, you cant challenge it, you cant talk about it; you can't even have a thought experiment without a load of defensive comments.

I have never felt that "frightened" at night or in the evening - at least in the UK, and that includes some dodgy areas that I used to walk home across on my way back from Drama Club as a teen. But I did take care, and adjust my route - not past the very shady pub for example.
On the other hand when I lived in the US - I knew I couldn't really go out alone after about 7 pm, and even got a Taxi back from the Supermarket, and I lived in a nice suburb. (But then in my first weeks I did hear two guys who were following me down a street discuss how they were doing it to un-nerve me.)

Read the OP and was filled with images of all the late-night frolicking I could do if men had a 9pm curfew.

Then I realised the only thing I'd be doing in this situation is desperately trying to find a female babysitter to replace DD's father, because buggered if I want him staying over on those rare occasions when I roll home drunk at midnight.

In pre-child days, though, it certainly would have been nice to be able to, for example, nip out for an emergency pint of milk without steeling myself for the inevitable verbal harassment from blokes outside the pub on the corner.

Violence against women might be predominantly by men, but most of it is behind closed doors by men that the women know. A 9pm curfew might actually increase incidents committed by men against the women in their homes!

I've never been a victim of threatening behaviour in a public place!

I walk in woods, remote areas all the time. I greet the men I meet; most are walking their dogs too. If I were to stumble and break a limb, I would trust their goodwill. I don't expect a sexualised encounter, and haven't had one in 20-plus years.

Men commit 96% of homicide globally and 98% of sex crime in the UK.

I think a lot of people of both sexes just don't appreciate how dramatically different patterns of crime between the sexes are. Men as a class represent a significant risk to women as a class.

Inebriati
When did victims become responsible for fixing bullies?

Apparently when they are male.

WOMen HELp change violence against them by how they raise their children, expecting that boys will be kind and caring and respectful , not tolerating “boys will be boys” as an excuse for bad behaviour

MEN need to be teaching this to their sons.

Men.

It is a Male problem. It is not for women to fix it, we did not create it and we are not the ones carrying out the violence.

By not setting up a them and us mentality between men and women. SO THat men see women as human like them.

Again, this is something MEN should be doing. It is not the job of women to teach men that we are human too. If they cannot see us as such then this is their problem to sort out.

Women are continually shoved into the caregiver role, the fixer role. Its seen as our job to change people, to heal them, to do all of the emotional caregiving. Why?

Being a military brat I was taught to march not walk and as such I have been very fortunate as men tend to avoid the woman marching by at a rapid pace (music on headphones with resting bitch face) .
I taught my dd to do the same it works

@Kittenbittenmitten That they walk places late at night that most women would not.

I've never been a victim of threatening behaviour in a public place!

Looks like I've been getting your share then, Fresta, as I would be hard pressed to remember all the crap that's happened to me over the years.

More seriously, my experience is a lot more common than yours, given how prevalent sexual harassment and assault are.

some women can be just as vicious and dangerous.

Let's count the number of men imprisoned for violence shall we?

Now let's count the number of women imprisoned for violence shall we?

By addressing the root cause.

Nothing will change unless we start from the beginning.

Why are men violent?
What is causing such an influx in male violence?
What is causing such an influx in male suicide?

It has to start at home. From the moment you register yourself as pregnant. There needs to be an infrastructure that can support parents from pregnancy onwards.

Everything we do/ the people we become stems from our up bringing.

Society is chaotic and often unmanageable. It's not just up to men to change but women as well.

Personally I think society is rapidly declining and failing the most vulnerable. We all need to be the change so that everyone is safe. And that change has to start from the very very beginning.

Thing is, men don't give a shit. I know posters will say NAMALT, my dad, brother, cousin husband etc whatever isn't like that, but let's face it, these men are out there and definitely have female relatives.

some women can be just as vicious and dangerous.

^^

They can, yes.

It's extremely less likely, but yes, they are also capable.

Next!

I've just got back from hearing Eve Ensler talk about male violence and she made it very clear that until men step up and decide male violence is unacceptable it will never end. I think shes right. Women can do a lot but at the end of the day we are physically the weaker sex. We need men to find male violence unacceptable and at the moment they just don't.

What I took from the article was all the little decisions a woman has to make ahead of being out alone which wouldn't even occur to most men. For example now the nights are shorter I only have a few routes I consider safe for running in the evening. DH would still just go on the route he fancies.

There are lots of good men out there but unfortunately there are many more bad ones.

ve just got back from hearing Eve Ensler talk about male violence and she made it very clear that until men step up and decide male violence is unacceptable it will never end. I think shes right.
^^

Me too.

But they won't. Because they do not care enough.

I do not wish to turn this into a trans thread at all, and I think that the responses to the question are genuine, but I thought people should know that this was the person who asked it.

I shouldn't think Muscato, has ever experienced these issues. I like the idea of ALL born males having a 9pm curfew though.