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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Is anyone prepared to admit their DC does not attend - now or in the future - a Russell Group university

204 replies

TheOliphantintheRoom · 01/10/2019 15:41

Don't be afraid. This is a safe space. MNHQ probably won't ban you. Though you may have to name change.
You can even fess up if your DC didn't go to uni.
Come on - I know you're out there.

OP posts:
AuntieMarys · 01/10/2019 15:42

One of mine did. One didn't. I had no idea what RG was .

TinklyLittleLaugh · 01/10/2019 15:44

One of mine did. One did an Art degree so didn’t (few Art degrees at Russell groups). One studies abroad so again not Russell group.

Bluntness100 · 01/10/2019 15:44

It's really not something to be ashamed of. I'm not sure why you're insinuating it is.

TeenPlusTwenties · 01/10/2019 15:46

My eldest hasn't gone to university, my youngest is highly unlikely to either, neither are academic enough. I'll be delighted if DD2 passes English GCSE.

I'm not sure if I was at a RG university myself (are Oxford and Cambridge in RG? Wink) but uni isn't the be all and end all, and it isn't suitable for everyone.

TheOliphantintheRoom · 01/10/2019 15:47

Sorry, Bluntness - I forget that we have to put in thread titles nowadays...

OP posts:
CouldBeOuting · 01/10/2019 15:47

DD went to a non Russell group uni (but has gone to one for her masters 😉)

DS on the other hand barely even passed a couple of GCSEs so won’t be going to ANY university.

Proud of DD, she’s worked hard but just as proud of DS because of the difficulties he has overcome just to get his two grade 4s.

TeenPlusTwenties · 01/10/2019 15:48

blunt I think you missed the invisible 'lighthearted' in the thread title.

RufusthebewiIderedreindeer · 01/10/2019 15:49

The first one isn’t at a russell group uni

The second one i doubt will be at a RG uni

The third...who knows

TheReturnoftheSmartArse · 01/10/2019 15:51

Neither of eldest did, though one went on to do a Masters at one and the other did another vocational degree elsewhere, but both read humanities. DS probably will, but only because he has a strong scientific bent, whereas the other two didn't. I'm not sure many people realise that the real benefit of a RG university is the science funding - makes no difference if you're no good at science, surely?

Sugarplumfairy65 · 01/10/2019 15:57

My middle child did, my eldest and youngest didn't

thecatsthecats · 01/10/2019 15:57

Just sneering at RG or not is amateur level snobbery.

My mum looks down on my sister's degree for being the wrong subject from a RG. (Although they're NC, my sister reluctantly wishes that she hadn't done it, tbf)

Sallycinammonbangsthedruminthe · 01/10/2019 15:57

Can;t join in I am afraid OP...the only one out of our family ever to go to university went to a RG one to study English .and the only other hope of the younger one going doesn;t look hopeful an she still plays with worms in the mud..that one I am not pinning any hopes on!!!

FizzyIce · 01/10/2019 15:58

My ds is at a RG uni .. kind of ! Waiting for an appeal decision as he didn’t get enough credits in his first year

BarbaraofSeville · 01/10/2019 16:01

I don't have DC but I went to an ex poly that specialised in part time degrees in partnership with the local chemical industry so apparently my First in chemistry isn't even worth a GCSE from a Mumsnet approved Grammar School.

Luckily I got a job in said chemical industry before I went to the unsuitable university and my employer paid the fees too.

PiggyPlumPie · 01/10/2019 16:02

DD is at St Andrews so no, DS chose the best place for his course which is not RG.

Mintjulia · 01/10/2019 16:03

My ds has no intention of going to uni.

He has been fixed on being a police officer since he could walk. He has twigged that they will pay for an OU law degree after a few years. He has it all mapped out.

He’s 11. Grin

ssd · 01/10/2019 16:04

Mine didn't but they walked past one once.
Does that count?

smartcarnotsosmartdriver · 01/10/2019 16:04

My sister attends a RG uni, I didn't. We did/do very different courses.

SleepyKat · 01/10/2019 16:06

I’ve studied at 4 universities. I wouldn’t say the RG one was any better/different.

Dd goes to a non RG. I’m a lecturer at a non RG and proud to be so.

TheOliphantintheRoom · 01/10/2019 16:06

Just sneering at RG or not is amateur level snobbery

Phew - that's a relief ' wouldn't want to be accused of being a professional snob.

OP posts:
SuperLoudPoppingAction · 01/10/2019 16:10

I went to a RG uni. I'm now studying at a new one and I'm just as stimulated and supported if not more so.

I don't feel the RG one helped me get a fancy job or anything.

I work PT for a charity and find there's a stark difference between my own institution and the level of inclusivity etc at the RG ones even though I know the staff really try hard to reach out to less advantaged students, care experienced people etc.

My eldest is doing an apprenticeship in IT support. She's very happy and I'm delighted for her. She may want to study later in life but it isn't what she wants just now.

My younger two might well wish to study at university but it would probably be a choice between 2 fairly prestigious RG unis and a newer one, just due to geography and subjects offered.

Out of those 3 nearest me, the new university has the most interesting researchers in my field. Just not the course I wanted to do :(

Allington · 01/10/2019 16:10

DD wanted to be a tooth fairy, but we couldn't find a suitable course at a RG university. Naturally I bullied her into doing theoretical physics instead, and now she's gone NC.

Where did I go wrong? Confused

IHaveBrilloHair · 01/10/2019 16:11

Dd doesn't I went to an ex Poly and dropped out!

Grammar · 01/10/2019 16:11

Aah, this is interesting.
My DH went to Cambridge AND Oxford, ( Medicine, dual 'varsity fellow, as I tease him).
I am a nurse and did nurse training ( albeit at a "teaching" hospital, as it was once known. All hospitals are teaching hospitals now, and anyway, nursing is a degree course these days, but that's irrelevant to this thread.
Dd1 went to Cambridge
Ds1 is at RG
DD2 will most definitely not be going to a RG.
I am battling with my DH to make him realise she can do what she wants, outside the shadow of her father and 2 siblings. She will probably do a vocational course at the local college. All power to her elbow.

I think it makes little difference in 10 or 15 years time, where you went and whether or not you got a 1st or otherwise.
I concede that it may make a difference directly after leaving uni and trying to find a job, but all in all, I think RG are possibly overrated and certainly no guarantee of long-term success.
Best of luck to all our DCs who don't go to a RG.

JengaNonConfirming · 01/10/2019 16:12

Not only is DD not at a RG uni, she also had an unconditional offer Grin