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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Is anyone prepared to admit their DC does not attend - now or in the future - a Russell Group university

204 replies

TheOliphantintheRoom · 01/10/2019 15:41

Don't be afraid. This is a safe space. MNHQ probably won't ban you. Though you may have to name change.
You can even fess up if your DC didn't go to uni.
Come on - I know you're out there.

OP posts:
Londonmummy66 · 01/10/2019 16:13

The Russell Group doesn't include all the really good UK universities - the likes of Royal Holloway and SOAS and St Andrews aren't included. Neither are any of our usually hellishly difficult to get into conservatoires so a lot of very bright young people won't be going to RG universities. Conversely a lot of over crammed, over helicoptered young people will and will find it very difficult when they get there, massively disappointing their overly invested MN parents.

SuperLoudPoppingAction · 01/10/2019 16:14

Dd did a vocational course at our local college. It taught her an awful lot she has gone on to need in her workplace even though it wasn't directly related to what she does now.
She met lots of different people and got quite a lot out of it.

They also help students find apprenticeships etc which is really useful

Allmyfavouritepeople · 01/10/2019 16:15

I went to an RG uni and it hasn't helped me at all. Being bright is all very well and good but it's what you do with it (and who you know) that counts. I have zero connections and had zero idea where I should aim my degree so it meant diddly squat.
Much rather have a degree from an ex poly that equated into a job than my airy fairy 'do what you want with it' degree. Humanities if you can't guess.

YouTheCat · 01/10/2019 16:16

My dd got her degree from a college and pretty much, walked into a job in that field, with a starting salary of 24k (which is very good as we're in the NE).

Waveysnail · 01/10/2019 16:18

I went to a 'new uni' over RG as degree I wanted to do was better than the RG uni one

littledrummergirl · 01/10/2019 16:19

Nope. Ds1 isn't at an RG university. He's doing vetmed at the number 1 vet school in the world though. stealth boast much

Teacher22 · 01/10/2019 16:19

DD went to Exeter just as it became an RG university and DS went to Kent, which isn't. You couldn't get a fag paper between the smarts of the two of them. They are both gobby, funny and clever. In five years' time it will not matter a bit where they went.

Original poster
TheOliphantintheRoom · 01/10/2019 16:19

she still plays with worms in the mud

Grin She'd be perfect for a non RG uni!

OP posts:
Hadalifeonce · 01/10/2019 16:21

I don't think the RG universities are now considered to all be the best. I think if you look at league tables there are several in the top 20 which aren't RG.

Turningtides · 01/10/2019 16:22

What are the RG unis please? Bristol? What else?

Ariadnepersephonecloud · 01/10/2019 16:24

One of my children has just strrted senior school and has already been in trouble twice. At this rate I'll just be glad if they manages not to get kicked out of that, university seems a long long way away...

nitgel · 01/10/2019 16:28

Grin BarbaraofSeville

my ds not only goes to a non-rg local ex poly university, he also lives at home (as one mn said this is probably not worth doing and he should instead do an apprenticeship). Also the university is always named on here and with mirth.

However, he is doing a course he is passionate about, visited the universities independently and chose the course as he was impressed by the tutors and course content. I am super proud of him.

saraclara · 01/10/2019 16:30

One did, one dropped out of hers after the first term, and took a vocational degree at the local very bog standard uni instead. Both very happy with how things worked out for them.

Troels · 01/10/2019 16:30

I am probably the only one who has no idea which Uni's are RG.
Oldest went to Uni abroad (we were living there) Second is in local college with no Uni plans and one left in high school with plans for Uni, no iea where.
So whats the big deal with RG? Is it coveted?

Mrsfrumble · 01/10/2019 16:31

I turned down an unconditional offer from a RG university to go to a non-RG one. Do I win some sort of prize?

I had no idea what the Russell Group even was at the time, and my parents and teachers didn’t seem to think it was a big deal either. It’s only since being on MN that I realised how much it seems to matter (to some people anyway).

As for DCs, they’re 8 and 6, so who knows...

HoldMyLobster · 01/10/2019 16:31

Mine is at a top 10 US university. I'm duly ashamed.

bigbluebus · 01/10/2019 16:32

DS did 1st time around - think he must be a secret Mumsnetter as he seemed obsessed with going to a RG Uni (nothing to do with us - I only knew what RG was due to MN). Anyway - he dropped out after Yr 1 as he didn't like the course. He is now at a long established but non RG Uni doing a different course and is much happier. He was considering a RG for his Masters but now thinks he'll stick with his current Uni.

Passthecherrycoke · 01/10/2019 16:40

I went to an ex poly.

I find university snobbery really upsetting. My parents didn’t want me to go to uni, and they didn’t know anything about uni. They wouldn’t have known a RG uni if it walked into them.
They didn’t understand a UCAS form or points or useful a levels or the difference between a BA and an msc. Obviously, at 17, neither did I. I did my best to navigate the system and chose and An ex poly.
I didn’t even know that until many years after I left.
I find it quite upsetting that total strangers would look down on people like me.

And you know what, I didn’t grow up disadvantaged or in poverty, I wasn’t even the famous “first in the family” to go to university. God knows what some teens are up against. Just to potentially be sneered at by naive, prejudiced recruiters harping on about Russell group Unis. It’s so sad

Did anyone see the bbc documentary breaking into the elite? It covered this excellently

Bobbyflay · 01/10/2019 16:43

I think schools push kids towards the RG unis. I didn’t know what they were until DC started looking at Unis. They looked at both RG and non RG. Took offer from RG because they liked the city it was in more than anything. They did get an unconditional offer from a non RG but turned it down because they didn’t want to go somewhere that offered unconditionals 🙄

pikapikachu · 01/10/2019 16:50

#1 is at a mediocre uni (definitely not RG)

#2 is the opposite and will probably end up going to a RG uni

#3 is the wildcard. I can see him doing something more unusual like a degree apprenticeship but no clue what his GCSE grades are likely to be.

ChocolateTea · 01/10/2019 16:50

Can I top trump and say I actually don't even have a foggiest what RG unis are, what makes them so special, and that I couldn't care less if my kids went to one?!? 😂

My 1st is from the OU. Over 6.5 years. Still bloody proud of it.

CendrillonSings · 01/10/2019 16:52

What exactly is the point of forming a “Group” if there are only two universities? The “Russell Pair”, surely? Smile

NearlyGranny · 01/10/2019 16:55

One did, two didn't. 6 degrees between them. Daren't calculate the total student debt. 😱

CornishMaid1 · 01/10/2019 16:56

I had to look them up as outside of Oxford and Cambridge I wasn't sure what qualified!

I'm still incubating DD so too early to tell, but DSis didn't, DSIL didn't, DH didn't go to uni, I didn't (although did for one post-grad, but that was because it was the closest to home that did the course I wanted rather than any thought it was 'better').

I really don't see the fascination and snobbery for RG universities. I did actively decide not to apply to Oxford and Cambridge (unknown to me I seem to have applied to some RG though) as I just did not think I would feel comfortable there if I got in and wanted to be closer to the SW.

berlinbabylon · 01/10/2019 16:56

Not hung up on RG (although I think my ex-uni is one) but I am a snob about the unis that used to be colleges/polys although it depends on subject and some ex-polys are very good at certain courses.

But I imagine you'd need to be of a certain age to have even heard of UCCA and PCAS forms, so in time I suspect nobody will know the difference and will just know that certain unis are good for certain subjects.

I am not sure ds will want to go to uni at all, I can absolutely see him deciding after A levels that he has had enough, and getting an apprenticeship instead.

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