To ask this man to stop sitting on my garden wall?

[SierraHotelIndiaTangoHappens]

I genuinely don't know whether I am being unreasonable or not. Nearly every day a man has taken to sitting directly on my garden wall whilst he seemingly waits for someone to pick him up.

He did it this morning again, I banged on the window, but he didn't even flinch! Only got up when I was taking my son outside to put him in his taxi with escort to school.

Should I tell him off next time he does it? Or just leave him be? I feel really weird about it (but I do have anxiety disorder so it might just be me)

@SierraHotelIndiaTangoHappens this website isnt pathetic though is it?

It has a load of good advice and helps a lot of people.

I get the impression you've said that because you've not got the answers you expected. The fact people believed you did pour golden syrup on your wall says a lot...

And fuck this guy, I have poured golden syrup on my wall, so if he does it again before the next time it rains, he'll get a sticky arse. He is a young fit man, who can sit somewhere fucking well else, he sat there before and my partner went back to check the door was locked and he didn't even move, he was like haha, did you forget something? WHAT THE FUCK get off my wall you loon.

What lovely person you are...

I don’t think it’s that mad really and now I’m kind of intrigued as to how this will end.

The pouring of the syrup I mean. I’ve seen people go much crazier than that

Nah, this website is fantastic. Particularly you@SierraHotelIndiaTangoHappens, you're hilarious 😁

No I didn't really, but that got you all pearl clutching again didn't it

Well not really given it was obvious you were full of tosh.

This website is pathetic

You mean the one you came to ask about a man on a wall...?

Just another poster who didn't like the answers she got.

I used to get teenagers sitting on my garden wall most of the evening being noisy and abusive when asked to move so I sympathise. I wouldn't like this either, and I'd go out and ask him to move. Its a bit rude on his part, to use someone else's property without permission.

Though clearly this site has now been taken over by (a) communists, who think all property is communal property and there is no such thing as private ownership and (b) the men-can-do-no-wrong idiots, because obviously a man cannot be expected to stand on his own legs and must be accommodated in order to "rest". You do wonder how people cope with things like walking and bus stops with no seats, but there you go.

The kids on our estate climb on our garden wall and then on the top of our garden swing which is decades old.
I know they're only children and I get them swiftly told that it's dangerous but am I bad for hoping it gives way one day?! I wouldn't want life threatening injuries or anything like that. Maybe a broken leg, arm, I'd take that.

Though clearly this site has now been taken over by (a) communists, who think all property is communal property and there is no such thing as private ownership

Don't be so daft.

My twopenneth is that he has no right to sit on your wall. It might cause damage to it over time. They’re not made to be load-bearing of an adult’s weight, plus it is just rude. It’s your wall not a public bench. You have every right to feel put-upon. Don’t know how to address though part from making it less bum-friendly.

We live out in the middle of nowhere, and one day there were three young people hanging about on our driveway. Went out to ask them if they needed directions or something, and they said no, they were waiting for a taxi. Realised one of them was the girl from next door. Who have their own driveway, a few feet away from ours. Still easily visible and safely off the road. Taxis for next door often ‘park’ over our driveway to pick up from next door. Came home one day in car to find a DPD van & a taxi, dropping off to next door, parked nicely covering our driveway but leaving the next-door unfettered. Odd, and a bit perplexing.
Our driveway is used quite a lot (along with the soft verge) as a passing place for speeding vans. lorries, cars, tractors, which causes a mess and the driveway needs re-doing every few years, but prevents accidents so we haven’t brought in the large boulders yet.

Apologies for my rant. It just came out and took over.

YANBU, especially with anxiety, which we in this house sympathise with.

I do wonder how many of these posters who would be happy to let someone sit outside on their wall, live in London where such an event would usually mean a drug exchange or a gang discussing who to stab next or someone having a sit to properly assess how to break in/watch people’s movements so they know when best to break in. That’s why the last man sat on the wall down our road and sadly it was both me and a neighbour who paid the price. I wish I’d reported him actually as I knew it wasn’t right to just be sitting on a wall for no purpose in the middle of the day.

You're overthinking it OP, anxiety or not

I'm sure that if he has nefarious intent, you'd know already

Also, you need a hobby. Preferably one that doesn't involve asking for opinions on a 'pathetic website'.

It's this kind of posting that gives MN a bad name. Why ask for opinions if you aren't going to accept that you might be being unreasonable???

Fuck that it's rude...barbed wire?

I do wonder how many of these posters who would be happy to let someone sit outside on their wall, live in London where such an event would usually mean a drug exchange or a gang discussing who to stab next

Just when we thought this thread couldn’t get any more batshit crazy, along comes.... “people only sit on walls to do drug deals or plan on stabbing people”. Fantastic. I’ll be on the lookout for my elderly neighbour and a wrap or a shank shall I?

Well they do here. I think I have only seen people sitting on walls outside my sister in laws on the 3 occasions they were arrested for drug dealing. And outside my own house in the week before me and a neighbour were burgled. If you live in a cul de sac like I did, why would anyone be sitting on your wall? Where would they be going? They’d have to go out of their way to even be there.

It’s not batshit at all.

I do wonder how many of these posters who would be happy to let someone sit outside on their wall, live in London where such an event would usually mean a drug exchange or a gang discussing who to stab next

Hands down the most studio thing I have ever read on mumsnet

Stupid

Is the man elderly? No
Is the man reading or eating his lunch? No
Is he waiting for someone (OPs man seems to be but this is dependant on whether you live on a main thoroughfare?) in my case - No
Is the man playing Pokemon go or something else ridiculous? No

I think it’s probably then reasonable to assume that he is in fact watching, and you should consider his behaviour suspicious. How is that batshit and not just being sensibly aware of your surroundings?

So 3x you saw police arriving and arresting drug dealers sitting on your sister’s wall?

Yes I did and the evidence is on police.co.uk under the crime map. There are 16+ offences per month on her estate.

Sounds like an absolute shit hole

Whilst it wouldn't bother me I can't say you're being unreasonable, it's your property! I doubt he'll stump up for the bill if it damages your wall

It is. It’s in the news every week for stabbings, but it is a real place in north London, so let’s not pretend everyone who sits on a wall is admiring your pointing work and not checking out what times you leave the house unattended.