To ask for cash instead of presents at kids party?

[HuntIdeas]

My twins are having a 5th birthday party next week and have 50 guests between them! I’m starting to freak out about the number of presents they will get and where to keep them in the house (plus all that extra plastic that will end up at the dump). WIBU to send a group WhatsApp message asking not to bring presents or to put a bit of cash in a card and I can take them to get something they choose? How could I word it?

Most guests are their new classmates (only started 3 weeks ago), so I don’t know the parents

x is saving for a Garmin and so if you need present ideas a $10 contribution towards that would be great

I thought this was a good idea until you said you specified the actual amount. That is really rude.

£2 in a piggy bank is an amazing idea. It's not vulgar or grabby or cf. It would save me a fortune (wrapping paper, selotape, petrol parking and my time)

No that wouldn't be and ok thing to do when you barely know people. Children love giving/choosing gifts to take to a party.
Might be a bit naughty but cant you keep to re-gift or maybe donate to a nursery or childrens group?

Plus that's the excitement of children's parties- opening the presents

Opening 50 presents is likely to take up half the party eating into time for food and games!

Don’t worry about storage, OP.

I guarantee you’ll be able to find a charity that gives Christmas presents to children who have none. If you’re anywhere in Surrey, the Salvation Army will pick up for their Christmas Toys appeal. PM me for details.

You can't ask for cash and I think perhaps you should've thought about this when you sent invites out, not a week before when some people may have already bought presents, although if it's next weekend, people may be buying this weekend so I'd either suck it up or send a quick text out now saying "by the way, please dont feel.you have to buy a present, just come and enjoy the party" although how you explain that to the twins when they themselves go to another child's party bearing gifts! Hopefully they'll get a lot if sharing presents!

Family - it's a small amount and I would have spent more than that time n something he probably wouldn't want. Not rude at all.

Ask for books

wrapping paper, selotape, petrol parking and my time

Your time? Do you run a business buying and wrapping birthday presents for your DC’s friends?

Family - it's a small amount

Not for some. The families I work with would avoid a party if that amount was asked for.

I'd be thrilled if people asked for cash! I hate choosing toys and wrapping presents, not to mention adding to the plastic waste in landfill

We said no presents because I didn't want loads of plastic crap in my tiny house but most people insisted so we said to buy books instead if they really wanted to get him something...would that be an option if cash is a no-go?

@Paperplain £10 might be a small amount to you but not to everyone . That might mean a child who would have went to party but the parents don’t have a spare £10 can’t get to go. Because maybe they were going to pick up a book at £3.

Mud - I said $10. Not £10!!we are in aus.

I actually think giving cash is better than gifts and often do it.
I think it's too late for the op though, something with the invites saying something like it's your presence not presents that's important to us however If you'd really like to gift something then a coin in the card for x piggy bank would be great.

I think you can.

I would say “Please don’t feel that you need to bring presents, we just want to see you all and have fun together. If you really want to give something, the girls are saving up for x, so a coin in their card would be really appreciated”.

I’ve been to parties where the invite says no gifts - most people feel they have to and took gifts anyway. I wish people did this to be honest - it’s so hard to buy for small children, especially twins (mine are 3). I’d much rather stick a fiver in a card but feels a bit mean if kids like to open gifts.

Muted - perhaps read posts properly and the information given rather than just deciding what they say to suit you.

We had a joint party with another school friend and were worried about the amount of unnecessary plastic tat so we created a just giving page to the Yorkshire Wildlife Park, the birthday boys got a free ticket to the zoo and a cuddly toy and were happy with that and the party.

@Paperplain so that’s about £6 I think even still. If the OP told people not to bring gifts then a week before the party sends a group message asking for cash it comes across as being a CF.

@Paperplain mmmkkk where in your post did you say your in Australia maybe I should work on my mind reading. Yes you said dollars but £10 and $10 US dollars are practically the same right now with the weak pound.

lyralalala
I really like the idea of the piggy bank, though I can see it working better when they're a bit older and everyone knows everyone. Someone doing that when the kids have only known each other 3 weeks might still raise eyebrows.

I might steal that idea for bump when they're born though

Muted - it's actually just under a fiver. I got the text Thursday and party tomorrow. I don't think it's cheeky.

As I said before we clearly have different views on this which is fine. I think it's great and not cheeky. You think it's cheeky.

We disagree- that's life.

Do not ask for cash

Do not say no presents, how upsetting for your children for guests to arrive with no present

If you are overwhelmed with gifts choose some to keep and donate the others to a worthy cause. That way no one offended.

When regifting make sure you know the name of the original giver so you don’t just return their present.
Keep some stuff for ‘stocking fillers’.

Muted - where in my post did I say I was in the US?!

OMG. Please don't do this. Why invite 50 people if you are worried about plastic tat. Just instruct "no gifts, your presence is enough."