Wank tissue left on sofa

[Laralippy]

I’ve name changed for this and will no doubt be accused of making this up, or maybe not, don’t know how common this is.

This morning I went into the living room and found a clump of wet tissues on the sofa which my partner had clearly used to dry himself after wanking. I know this is absolutely gross, and I’m furious - was already angry enough and have changed my ways recently so that I’m only doing my own laundry, my own washing up etc as I don’t see why I should have to do his, and now he has left this on the sofa. He did subsequently bin it without me asking (how good of him) but i find it so disrespectful that he’d just leave it there for me to find. I know this reads like a parody post of ‘angry/first world problem mumsnetter’ but it’s sadly not. Is this common? I highly doubt it. We don’t have children thank god.

No, that’s not common at all. No way would I put up with that shit.

How can he use wet tissue to clean himself? Wouldn't it just crumble and flake everywhere?. When I've tried to use wet tissue to clean the baby's bum it just flakes off and turns gross. Wouldn't it of been easier to just rinse it under the sink

Sorry Op the post has gone over my head to many questions to ask

How can he use wet tissue to clean himself?

I assume they were initially dry.

One would assume the tissue was dry when he used it, and it then became wet sodrained..

OP that is really gross. Wanking is fine, but don't leave your wankrags all over the place! They stink as well after a while.. hork..

The jizz has made the tissue wet. You’ve obviously not used a tissue before because your DH has a beaker.

Yes it was normal toilet paper

I thought most men used a sock !!!!
(Light hearted). 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

No, that’s really grim

But surely you don't have that much jizz to clean up that a tissue is fully wet and there's plenty of them

DId he confirm that this is indeed a "wank tissue" (this will go down with penis beaker in Mumsnet lore as terminology!)

More importantly, isn't this more about how you communicate as a couple in general?

You said you're doing your own laundry etc...are you becoming more separate and has he been doing other things which make you more resentful?

It sounds like communication and a good chat is key here. What is stopping him from being more respectful to you - can he see the error of his ways, and how something like this could be truly offensive/final straw after lots of little incidents?

It is grim though I just assumed men just run it over a tap I don't know. I don't even know if I want to have a think about what I'd do in that situation

Title is a bit off-putting - don't mind gruesome content and swearing actually in threads - I do it myself.

Grim.

If he wants to wank he can atleast clean after himself, after he . . . Cleaned up after himself.

I actually laughed out loud when I read the title. Never heard it phrased like that before. And what if a visitor had found it! I’m guessing he forgot about it this time but in future he needs to bin it immediately. Or wank in the shower.

@sodrained

I was under the impression that quantities of ejaculate can truly vary from man to man, and dependent on how recently they last ejaculated etc

Yes, i thought that was what socks were for. But OP I guess as you aren't doing his washing anymore he didn't have any fresh socks.
But seriously that's gross. Not the wanking obviously, but the leaving tissues about with his spunk on. Grim!

Could it have been sneeze tissue? Allergy tissue? Why are you assuming it’s wank tissue?

@GinDaddy That does make sense just never assumed it would be so much it would require that many tissues it would clump and be wet. I'm making myself feel sick now sorry.

The technical term for this is a "Spunk Rose" due to the way the crumpled tissue resembles a flower.

Please amend your title for accuracy.

What’s your issue? That he was wanking or that he left a tissue?

I’d be mildly annoyed, but not “fummin’” about it. Yes it’s a bit grim but if he’s generally a nice bloke I’d have a bit of a moan then get on with my day.

I'd get him his own personal wet wipes and pack them in the top of his case then show him the door who would want to live with such a minger.

Haha he must have forgotten to bin it and now he’s been caught out. Oh well, I’m sure he’s embarrassed and has learnt his lesson. No harm done.

I can't actually believe that 12% of mumsnetters think it's ok for a bloke to leave wank tissues on the sofa < - - - Vom.