To expect waiting staff to have some common sense?

[rabbitheadlights]

In a well established mid range restaurant for lunch yesterday OH and I ordered both had steak and requested medium rare. I should add OH is a chef both steaks came out well done, not a problem send them back these things happen. Waiter returns to the table to tell us chef will re-do and how do we "actually" want our steak as he is adamant that they were both medium rare!

OH laughed and offered to cook them himself, but later spoke to the manager and said something along the lines of, "I really think your FOH team should know not to repeat what the chef says to customers like that, a simple steaks will be redone would have sufficed, as it is your staff have effectively come to my table and called me a liar, which by the way I'm not and if chef is adamant both steaks were right can I suggest some training?

I told a friend who said the steaks were redone so we shouldn't have spoken to manager about waiter repeating what the chef said... So WIBU?

YANBU. Steaks should arrive cooked as you asked for them to be cooked. You were right to complain. Waiter was a dick to say what he did but he's probably sick and tired of customers who don't know what they are talking about and lumped you into that category. I knew someone who sent back steak tartare as it wasn't cooked.

Lol at the 'there is no medium rare' comment.

I think there are grey areas when cooking steak. We live near an Argentinan steak house and ‘rare’ there is a lot less cooked than the rare you might be given in a restaurant with predominantly English chefs. A friend ordered a medium one day and was most put out when a (to our eyes) very rare steak was dished up. When he asked for it to be cooked a little more the waiter told him ‘that is how we cook a medium steak in Argentina’.

drives me mad when PPS suggest it's subjective ITS NOT!!

Yes @rabbitheadlights! It’s like saying a boiled egg is subjective. Sure people prefer them cooked different ways, but a soft boiled egg is a soft boiled egg!

If your husband said the things you say he did in your OP, then he’s a massive, pompous twat.

If someone suggested you didn’t know something that it is your job to do every day, you wouldn’t let them know that you know what you are talking about? Nothing pompous about letting people know that.

‘’I say what i mean and i mean what i bloody well say’’ - oh, you’re one of those ‘Take me as I am, I say what I mean even if it’s offensive’ people. They’re GREAT they are! 🙄

We live near an Argentinan steak house and ‘rare’ there is a lot less cooked than the rare you might be given in a restaurant with predominantly English chefs.

Ridiculous comment. You can’t compare different cultural restaurants. You don’t go to a Chinese and expect their curry dishes to be authentic Indian. Same with saying a British steak house would be the same as an Argentinian one.

But whether in Miller and Carter in Newcastle or Glasgow your medium steak should be the same. And they aren’t.

The way you've reacted on this thread makes me think it's more than likely that you and your DH were horribly rude.

I mean, "Something tells me 90% of you are hiding behind your inboxes trying/wanting/needing to.be someone else I am me" You're posting anonymously on an Internet forum too love.

If your husband is a chef, he should really know that you wont get decent steaks, cooked to your specification in a midrange restaurant. Just doesnt happen.

In UK, always ask for your steak less cooked than you want it. Ask for rare if you like medium. Ask for medium if you like it well done etc.

@omgshefoundmeout

It is so annoying when someone comes along who is even more wrong than the op and that's a lot in this case. Stop derailing the thread

17:52OMGshefoundmeout

I’m not a chef but people saying they want steaks ‘medium rare’ annoys me. You can have a blue steak, a rare steak, a medium one or well done. Saying medium rare is meaningless - which one of those two is it you want? I think most people who say this actually mean medium but think adding rare sounds more sophisticated.

Today 08:29OMGshefoundmeout

I think there are grey areas when cooking steak. We live near an Argentinan steak house and ‘rare’ there is a lot less cooked than the rare you might be given in a restaurant with predominantly English chefs. A friend ordered a medium one day and was most put out when a (to our eyes) very rare steak was dished up. When he asked for it to be cooked a little more the waiter told him ‘that is how we cook a medium steak in Argentina’.

Sorry @Kellyanddavesmum

DH likes his steak blue. Some places have outright refused to cook it like that for him - one place tried to cite 'health & safety'.

Well that was a bit uncalled for Kellyanddavesmum.

OH laughed and offered to cook them himself, but later spoke to the manager and said something along the lines of, "I really think your FOH team should know not to repeat what the chef says to customers like that, a simple steaks will be redone would have sufficed, as it is your staff have effectively come to my table and called me a liar, which by the way I'm not and if chef is adamant both steaks were right can I suggest some training?

What. A. Prat.

And to think a cow died for this shite. 🙄

Seconds later, came out and said the ITALIAN chef made it exactly as his mamma did.

I have had similar, pasta undercooked to the point it was impossible to eat. Told the waitress who replied "our chefs are Italian".

Great, but I have never been served inedible food in Italy, was my (somewhat pompous?) reply.

Even if the food was fine (it really wasn't), they should realise that if the customer is returning it then arguing with them isn't useful.

@omgshefoundmeout just go and learn about steak and how different countries cook it and you'll be grand

blue steak, a rare steak, a medium one or well done. Saying medium rare is meaningless

Incorrect. Bleu, saignant, à point et bien cuit in French correspond exactly To rare, medium rare, medium and well cooked in English. Medium rare is absolutely one of the four standard cookings of steaks.

Confusion only reigns when people like you make up alternative systems from the long established restaurant protocols.

Dp has his steak blue. The only place that has ever done it correctly is a local greek restaurant. Youd think cooking a steak wouldnt be so hard, but so many restaurants start off with cheap steaks, and then dont cook them properly either. Its really disappointing. Also snotty chefs of waiters that argue the point with you can ruin a rare night out

Well done steak for medium rare and then arguing about it is not acceptable. No way to run a restaurant.

This person gets it.

Also snotty chefs of waiters that argue the point with you can ruin a rare night out

What's worse are then one who don't allow you to have a say in how your meat is cooked, one place I went to there was a large sign saying the meat is cooked as the chef sees fit.

Vote with your wallet. If it was rubbish, chalk it up as a write off and don't go back.

We’ve been to restaurants that over cook steaks, when complained were told ‘that’s how we do our medium steaks’

Well feck off, it’s not your medium steak I’m eating it’s mine, the one you are charging me for !

“OH laughed and offered to cook them himself”

What a cunt

As an ex chef, and waiter, I can tell you, MOST have common sense, and know the five finger rule on steaks (look it up for others)

Normally you'd write on the stub... Med rare or even rump m/r so the chef knows.... Plus if no info, MOST chefs opt for medium rare, as you can cook.more if needed, and very few will even cook a well done, as we believe you've just ruined a nice bit.of.meat. .... So we were taught!

I even have a special cert as a call order chef (amongst other certificates).

YANBU and actually I would have spoken to the manager too.

The steaks weren't what you asked for and the staff acted like a bunch of d*s.

It's a thumbs up from me and you're DH isn't the pompous twat everyone is suggesting: his profession is entirely relevant under the circumstances and he probably told them so they wouldn't assume he didn't know what he was talking about.

Fair play.

The waiting staff are getting paid minimum wage most likely and what do they get for their trouble? A moody arsed chef who has probably given them the same crap a dozen times that day because they can't take ctiticism and always think their correct. Topped off with a complaint for passing on chefs message. Might I add said chef would probably kick off again if they found their message was not passed on. In your husbands line of work he should know foh take all the crap from customers so cut them some slack.