To expect waiting staff to have some common sense?

[rabbitheadlights]

In a well established mid range restaurant for lunch yesterday OH and I ordered both had steak and requested medium rare. I should add OH is a chef both steaks came out well done, not a problem send them back these things happen. Waiter returns to the table to tell us chef will re-do and how do we "actually" want our steak as he is adamant that they were both medium rare!

OH laughed and offered to cook them himself, but later spoke to the manager and said something along the lines of, "I really think your FOH team should know not to repeat what the chef says to customers like that, a simple steaks will be redone would have sufficed, as it is your staff have effectively come to my table and called me a liar, which by the way I'm not and if chef is adamant both steaks were right can I suggest some training?

I told a friend who said the steaks were redone so we shouldn't have spoken to manager about waiter repeating what the chef said... So WIBU?

I’m with a PP - even if they were well done, the waste of sending back two steaks is the thing that stands out most to me. And your husband does sound like a bit of an annoying customer to be honest!

Look OP. Not great that steaks were cooked wrong. Also - husband sounds like an idiot asking if he should cook it himself - just because he’s a chef. My best friends husband is the head chef at a Michelin restaurant and he would never dream of being so rude and pompous. The attitude of your husband probably made the situation worse.

If in any doubt order a steak rare as you can always send it back for more cooking. However I only occasionally order steaks when I’m out as it tends to be a minefield wrt it being cooked as you ordered/ wanted it.

My oh only mentioned being a chef after being told he didn't know what medium rare is (being asked how do you 'actually' want it cooked. I think it's valid to say actually I'm a chef and I know perfectly well what a medium rare steak looks like and that is what I want .... Alas this wasn't my question I just asked if the waiter should have filtered what the chef said

Op, I’l with your husband and don’t think he was rude at all. I do think that a lot of British people are a bit mad with their inability to complain correctly, but that’s another thread.
The only bit I’m a bit appalled at is a chef asking for a steak medium rare. That’s massively over cooking in my book, and a total waste of a good steak.

rabbitheadlights

For me its not that your DH complained, its the comments.

LOL, you people go and enjoy paying to eat shoe leather if you really want to.

Just ignore the nonsense OP...

I agree boney but the OP only wants to be told they are right.

That's because she's right.

If waiter said that to me... I would assume Chef was an arse. That might annoy me into leaving immediately. I guess if you work in the industry then you know Chefs are arsey so arsey Chef doesn't offend. Therefore all OP is asking about is waiter being over honest.

In general, I like honesty. So that puts me in the YABU camp to OP's very specific question.

Seems like OP's DH just wanted to make sure someone told the waiter off. And maybe the chef too, for good measure. At most charitable interpretation, her DH is a bossy boots.

@ariamontgomery would you honestly eat 2 over cooked steaks in a restaurant to avoid waste? Surely the waste lies with the restaurant?

Lays

I am 47yo and NOT a chef BUT I have always had my steaks medium rare. I can't tell you how many times I have had to send my meal back because it is either medium or well done. If I am paying £25/30 for a good steak cooked to how I asked then I expect that and nothing else. But I am not British born and I say this in the most sensitive way, the British like to whine but HATE to actually feel like they are making a fuss even if they are paying for it. I have lived here for 25 years and still don't get it

Cheeserton
That's because she's right.

Yes she was right to send them back but the question that the waiting staff asked is right as well.

How so @Boney ?

The amount of times I heard 'I'm a chef' when I waitressed, you might be but this is TGI Friday's not the Ivy and I know that you work at the Nando's over the road so let's cut the nonsense, I'm not discounting your bill. Maybe your DH should've cooked you a lovely meal at home

BTW I'm not saying you shouldn't have sent them back, just the additional comments to the manager were unnecessary

Which ones @whybirdstop? Not to repeat chefs words? This will affect future custom to patrons who don't know or accept that chefs are moody fuckers, or the fact that he's a chef when challenged on knowing what mid rare is? Let's get it right most FOH get 90 percent of tips chefs get 10 percent FOH should know not to repeat chefs arsey comments

It’s not subjective. A medium steak is a medium steak. It should have a pronounced band of pink, never any red.

I was out for steak tonight and the “medium” steak was definitely rare-medium. Frustrating as when I’ve been before I would go for medium well but ended up getting a well done steak.

And hardly anywhere gets it right. I used to date a chef and we often came up against this in restaurants, where the kitchen tried to tell him he was wrong. It was always the cheaper restaurants with the “cooking by numbers” chefs who wouldn’t know a medium steak if it smacked them face. The guy I was dating was working in a high end restaurant and could cook a medium steak perfectly. Every time.

OP
Dont try to pretend now that this was some polite and ever so benevolent quiet word your DH had with the manager for the benefit of the establishment.

He was an arse. The consensus on here seems to be that it's one thing to send food back and quite another to be needlessly arsey.

He wanted to point score and now you don't like it that people have said it was unreasonable.

but the question that the waiting staff asked is right as well.

It was not. It was arsey and inappropriate, having received well done instead of medium rare.

this is TGI Friday's not the Ivy

Even accounting for the fact I would barely call TGI's low end never mind mid, there's still no excuse for screwing up the basic cooking when people are paying good money for it.

@lolasmiles no pretence here, I suggest you don't interpret things to suit yourself and if you need a bandwagon there are probably far more interesting and or important ones to jump upon .... Were you a waitress once upon a time?

It certainly wasn't anything near the shit hole that tgi's is and the prices reflected that, you pay for a rib eye you want a decent one

@yabbers 😄🙌I can cook a steak to medium or medium rare everyone and I'm not a chef drives me mad when PPS suggest it's subjective ITS NOT!!

It certainly wasn't anything near the shit hole that tgi's is and the prices reflected that

I also just don't understand either why objecting to a badly fucked up meal order equals 'you should stay at home and could'. Bloody ridiculous commentary.