About these parents letting their toddler run riot in a restaurant?

[Cheeseoncrumpets]

I want to start by saying that I have no issue with children being in restaurants, but this really did take the piss IMO.

Went out with a friend to a well known chain restaurant for lunch. Very family friendly and lots of families there as a result. As above I have no problem with that, however one couple who unforunately were sat in the booth right behind us, continually let their toddler run riot.

The restauarnt have high chairs available but they had for whatever reason chosen not to use one and he was sat on the seat next to his parents. He kept getting down and running off, firstly he ran right over to the otherside of the restaurant then towards the serving hatch area where staff are collecting hot food, and finally towards the kitchen doors which suddenly prompted the father to go and retrieve him. They sat him down and kept trying to pacify him with lots of 'no don't do that Charlie' (not his real name), 'would you like to play on Mummy's phone Charlie?'. He then kept trying to climb over the booth, and was at one point standing on the seats. At no point did either parent do much to get him under control other than utter a half arsed 'dont do that Charlie'. A walk outside usually works IME.

Eventually he climbed down and went to sleep on the floor next to their table cuddling a soft toy, meaning staff and customers had to either step over him or walk around him. Both parents sat there and just gazed at him adoringly before paying the bill, scooping him up in their arms and leaving.

I'd like to stress I know this wasnt the little boy's fault. He wasnt any older than about two, was clearly bored and just wanted to go off and explore like toddlers do. Im just a bit shocked that either parent thought this was acceptable parenting?

AIBU to think that some parents are incrediably entitled and expect everyone else to tolerate their kids?

I guess it's what gets to you, I'd probably would of noticed it but leave it to the staff.

I have a 2 year old, he sits in a high chair for food (purely because I'd like to eat the meal I payed for and I don't want to lose my mind chasing him through tables) I wouldn't myself want to risk him hurting himself or annoying people.

Last time we went out, we were in a back to back booth area and a child behind me was hitting me, and climbing over the sofa while I was eating. And the parents casually telling her to sit down and stop occasionally. I think that's the kinda stuff where I'd say parenting was needed.

YANBU
As a student I was severely scalded after a little shit darling was allowed to run riot in our restaurant (it was in a hotel and he'd been doing it all week) and barged into me while I was carrying a load of fresh, hot drinks.
There's a time and a place to let kids play - a playpark, yes, a restaurant, absolutely not.

merely there were a group of inconsiderate twat parents rather than one. But it only takes one to cause a server to trip over them, it only takes one to be bothering other diners.

Did a server trip over Charlie? Was he approaching other diners and bothering them?

No. He wasn't.

OP is just looking for a bunfight.

Charlie’s teenage years are going to be fun.

@Venger - I meant SEN. Children with SN don’t always have behavioural issues but children with SEN often do - parents of kids with SEN in my experience often make more of an effort to encourage their kids behave.

I knew a toddler who had to have skin grafts from the very hot drink that he tipped over onto the side of his face, ear and neck ... reached up to a table and pulled it off and over himself. And that was at a grandparent's!

Imagine that happening in a restaurant ... all those trays of hot drinks and food being toted around. ... have no doubt the parents would be complaining mightily if their toddler caused such a disaster. And what if it ended up harming someone else!

They should be more under control in a restaurant, even family friendly restaurants.

Cheeseoncrumpets: AIBU to think that some parents are incrediably entitled
..........

Entitled to what?

I don't think I'd have taken much notice of the child and parents. I've seen far worse that what you described. I probably would have picked him up off the floor though.

Children with SN don’t always have behavioural issues but children with SEN often do

It's still not the same thing. SEN refers solely to educational requirements.

. If you don't like children behaving like children then go somewhere else. They and their active DC have as much right to be there as you and your church mice DC.

See, the thing is, if all children did this no one would want to go out because every place would be hell on earth. Charlie et Al are only able to behave like this because the majority of children don't do it and therefore it's tolerated.

So, no, Charlie and his parents only have as much right to be there as everyone else if they accept the social contract that decrees how you behave in a restaurant.

I think I’m offering the world a favour by letting them look at my adorable 19 month old wiggling his butt around their tables .

As others say it’s incredibly dangerous and selfish to let kids run riot when they could hurt themselves or someone else by getting scalded and badly burned from spilled hot drinks. It’s also selfish because it spoils other peoples’ meals that they may have been looking forward to. I was on a train the other day ( booked first class for a treat) and a family with the noisiest kids ever say down and they talked and shrieked for hours. Could even hear them through my ear set. All the while parents smiling indulgently oblivious of the death stares.

I would far rather sit next to a noisy family than someone sitting in judgement of others.

Christ I wouldn't. I'd much rather sit next to someone 'sitting in judgement'. At least I'd have a nice quiet lunch then.

These threads never end well. People always try to misrepresent what other posters have actually said:

'Well it would have been better if they had been able to get the child to sit at the table'.
Response - 'Oh that's right, you're a perfect parent whose children never do anything wrong'.

OP is just looking for a bunfight.

No I'm not. I just don't think its acceptable to let a child run riot like that.

Also I’d safely assume that those looking at me and my DH are solely doing so out of admiration to our toddler who looks cute sat on the table being all cheeky 😀. Or so I convince myself..

Sorry but as long my child is safe and is not directly hindering others in terms of tantrums or being an obstacle then where he walks or runs and where he sits is no ones problem.

You’re very lucky Op, I had a couple of kids climbing over my very high booth & landing on me. Parent oblivious, or just didn’t give a shit. Then they’d run round & begin again .

Do you have children op?

I don’t go to restaurants often with my son as he just doesn’t behave but, if I’d put him (he’s 2.5) in a high chair he would just scream the place down continuously.
It’s a pain running around after a toddler that won’t sit still or be pacified.
give them a break, it’s hard going

(I wouldn’t let a child run around alone obviously) but an explore is ok.

Mine went through a phase of that, it only lasted a summer.

Taking him out and getting him used to it was the only way. A few people got disturbed along the way but we apologies as best we could and most didn’t mind that much.

Children have to learn, sometimes they make mistakes but the parent must be in control of the situation at all times.

Sounds like they made the rookie error of not trapping the toddler on the inside of the booth seat and then making sure your legs block them from crawling out underneath.

There are normally two camps of parents on these threads.

Those who let their children play in a restaurant, without any consideration for anyone else in there. They are entitled to be there so can do as they please.

And those who try to teach their children normal social expectations in a restaurant, bearing in mind that there are about a million other places that a child can play.

I have DC. Never has this happened, because we stepped in and didn't allow it.

But now I'll be called smug etc, merely for parenting my DC.

OP you’re in the right here, who the fuck lets their child sleep on a restaurant floor? There’s no excuse for this, parents sound like half wits.

@CassianAndor not really, I think it’s just luck of the draw tbh.

One of my children sits fine, the other doesn’t- parented exactly the same.

Parenting is only a small proportion, their personality is the bigger part.
I don’t judge anymore, because of that.

We were in a Greene King pub at the end of our road last month and there were 2 kids running around being a nuisance, getting under the waitress' feet as she was putting out hot food.

The landlord came out and bellowed (really loudly, made everyone jump) "SEAT THESE CHILDREN NOW OR LEAVE"... you could have heard a pin drop for ages, then the parents picked up the kids and left.

No judgements were made. The behaviour was unacceptable in those surroundings, the landlord sorted it out.

they talked and shrieked for hours

But that’s the point of being on public transport. You are there with members of the public including kids that sing rhymes and talk about nothingness..

I wouldn’t shut my kids up. But I would tell them to keep it quiet. However that doesn’t work with all kids now does it..

This too wouldn’t bother me :S. unless they were screaming or arguing. Talking and being enthusiastic in their conversations would honestly just melt my heart,

Not good to be the individualistic and forget you are member of a society that contains kids.