About these parents letting their toddler run riot in a restaurant?

[Cheeseoncrumpets]

I want to start by saying that I have no issue with children being in restaurants, but this really did take the piss IMO.

Went out with a friend to a well known chain restaurant for lunch. Very family friendly and lots of families there as a result. As above I have no problem with that, however one couple who unforunately were sat in the booth right behind us, continually let their toddler run riot.

The restauarnt have high chairs available but they had for whatever reason chosen not to use one and he was sat on the seat next to his parents. He kept getting down and running off, firstly he ran right over to the otherside of the restaurant then towards the serving hatch area where staff are collecting hot food, and finally towards the kitchen doors which suddenly prompted the father to go and retrieve him. They sat him down and kept trying to pacify him with lots of 'no don't do that Charlie' (not his real name), 'would you like to play on Mummy's phone Charlie?'. He then kept trying to climb over the booth, and was at one point standing on the seats. At no point did either parent do much to get him under control other than utter a half arsed 'dont do that Charlie'. A walk outside usually works IME.

Eventually he climbed down and went to sleep on the floor next to their table cuddling a soft toy, meaning staff and customers had to either step over him or walk around him. Both parents sat there and just gazed at him adoringly before paying the bill, scooping him up in their arms and leaving.

I'd like to stress I know this wasnt the little boy's fault. He wasnt any older than about two, was clearly bored and just wanted to go off and explore like toddlers do. Im just a bit shocked that either parent thought this was acceptable parenting?

AIBU to think that some parents are incrediably entitled and expect everyone else to tolerate their kids?

Can I just say that every single person that has worked in hospitality despises parents that don’t control their children.

If they can’t be trusted to sit in a high chair/next to you for 45 minutes while you eat lunch then don’t take them to restaurants.

It’s slightly different if the place is specifically geared up for children. But still, they shouldn’t be dashing about unless in a play area.

DisorganisedOrganiser

To be honest I would’ve sat right next to them adoring the child and entertaining him. But to each their own I don’t expect everyone is same as me and I do get that there are people who go to restaurants for the peace and quiet. Also maybe it’s dangerous for the child to be running around and maybe not very sensible for him to sleep on the floor.

But most importantly he sounds truly loved and the other aspects could be worked on.

I would say in this circumstance a parent should have play dough or colouring books or something that they can put on the table for the child to be entertained. He probably was too sleepy to follow any rules. It personally doesn’t bother me enough to post about it in Mumsnet to be honest.

I would far rather sit next to a noisy family than someone sitting in judgement of others.

Me too.

I'd much rather give the person in the next booth a solidarity eyebrow raise and a "I remember those days well" than shit all over their day by being a judgemental cow. Who does that benefit? No one. Makes the recipient feel like crap and outs the judger in a bad mood.

I would far rather sit next to a quiet judging person than a noisy family any day of the week and so would you really.
I don’t give too hoots what other people are thinking as long as they do so quietly but noisy people kids or adults are bloody annoying and mar the experience.

There were lots of other children managing to sit and behave, in fact all of this would have been prevented if they'd have just sat him in a highchair.

Funny thing about children is that they're individuals and not simply one homogeneous mass. Some will sit quietly and colour in or study the menu like the proverbial dream child and others will not. It applies to highchairs too, some children tolerate them and other children don't. DD would scream blue murder if she had to sit in a highchair and if this Charlie was the same, I bet you'd have judged them for that too.

*Can I just say that every single person that has worked in hospitality despises parents that don’t control their children.

If they can’t be trusted to sit in a high chair/next to you for 45 minutes while you eat lunch then don’t take them to restaurants. *

This!

Its not rocket science is it? Though according to some posters on here the wants and needs of staff and other diners must come second to the poor breeders who can't control their offspring

I bet they would have complained if he'd have ended up getting scalded by hot food or drink though.

My eldest was always a wrigglers and mover so we planned restaurants accordingly. He has never been allowed to run around a restaurant as much as he’d want to.

Restaurants are dangerous with food and drinks being carried there is not room for the oh don’t judge let the kids run around attitude.

"in fact all of this would have been prevented if they'd have just sat him in a highchair."

Well aren't you so informed about this child you know nothing about. My 2 year screams the place down if I put him in a highchair. Would you have rather sat listening to that? You have absolutely no idea what was going on for those parents that day.

‘Waits for “in Europe where they actually like children there are children sleeping all over restaurant floors” posts’

Does anyone else have “another parent’s toddler” filter switched on in restaurants where they take no bloody notice whatsoever at anyone else’s behaviour?

Noise is to be expected in restaurants especially family friendly ones, but if I am eating out with my DC (a treat that I can only afford occasionally) I don't want to be disturbed by someone else's toddler running around making a nuisance of himself. My children know how to sit and behave, if they didn't I wouldn't bring them.

Well aren't you so informed about this child you know nothing about. My 2 year screams the place down if I put him in a highchair. Would you have rather sat listening to that? You have absolutely no idea what was going on for those parents that day.

Well then don't take him to resteraunts then if he cant behave.The world doesn't revolve around the needs of you and your kids. I really don't give two hoots about what was going on for those parents that day. Its not my concern. I was however pretty concerned for the staff trying to do a pretty crappy job for a rubbish wage whilst someone else's toddler ran riot and got under their feet.

Fin, yes me! I don’t even have toddlers anymore! My thought process is: I hear screaming / crying / etc. Is it my child or a child I am responsible for? No. Thank goodness! Does it seem as if the parents need help. No. They seem ok. Shoot sympathetic, we have all been there look. Get on with my life.

Why does it bother you so much that you felt the need to post on MN about it other than to start to a bunfight? You don't know them or their situation, it sounds like they were at least trying by telling him to sit down/offering him the phone, etc, and you're never going to see them again. Did you ever eat any of your meal or were you too busy making notes ready for starting this thread? From what I've read it sounds like youd have been determined to pick fault no matter what they did.

When people judge others, it says far more about them than it does about the people they're judging.

Though according to some posters on here the wants and needs of staff and other diners must come second to the poor breeders who can't control their offspring

Looks like everyone is agreeing with you though, apart from the “this could all have been avoided if they put him in a highchair” point. Was that not the response you were hoping for?

Toddlers running round at knee level terrifies me. So many flashbacks to waitressing days with parents who weren’t even looking in their child’s direction. At least Charlie’s parents got up eventually before he got into the kitchen, I suppose.

Id be more worried about the fact there's hot food and drink about, for that reason, rather than just consideration of others they should have tried to keep him under control. I'll be honest if I go out I hope to avoid children as I'm usually having a break from my own, a chain on a Saturday sounds like hell!

No not all children are one homogeneous mass. Don't think anyone suggested they are. But it's idiotic to let your child play up in a restaurant and unsafe let alone how it ruins everyone else's experience. But yeah as long as they are expressing themselves

The parents sound like twats. I hope they left a massive tip for the staff they were hugely inconveniencing with their pathetic parenting.

Ginger if your child screams in a high chair and is uncontrollable otherwise you don’t take him to restaurants. It’s really very simple.

No parent has a god-given right to take their DC to restaurants. It won’t kill you if you have to have a few years of not eating out.

YANBU

Hot plates of food are being carried about. It’s dangerous.

You can’t just let your child lie on the floor in a restaurant because they want to. What if a staff member tripped over him and covered him in hot coffee? Or if a customer accidentally stepped on his hand.

I was however pretty concerned for the staff trying to do a pretty crappy job for a rubbish wage whilst someone else's toddler ran riot and got under their feet.

If he was creating that much of a hazard that they couldn't do their jobs safely then they'd have had a discreet word with the parents about it.

Probably guilty middle class parents who worry they aren't spending enough time with Charlie hence let him run riot.

"Well then don't take him to resteraunts then if he cant behave."

I never said he can't 'behave' he just doesn't like being in a high chair but you're clearly one of those horrible people who just feels the need to comment on other people's parenting to make amusement for yourself.

Of your child screams in a highchair then you can plonk them next to you or sit them on your knee or whatever. As long as they’re not sprinting across the floor it doesn’t really matter.

Everyone has a different tolerance for this kind of thing. There's a pp who won't go into a restaurant if there are kids present; others aren't bothered at all. It's hard to tell how bad this was without being there. I have to say I never noticed kids at restaurants before I had them myself. There are lots of threads like this on MN, I need to stop reading them as I'm now terrified of bringing DD anywhere other than McDonald's (I know, I know).

Calling parents 'breeders' is pretty nasty though.

Here’s an anecdote for all the people thinking this is fine - friend and her mum having lunch in a nice restaurant (not a chain, not especially family friendly. Big groups of mums getting pissed while their DC run around the place. DC are around about eye height to the corner of the tables. Friend’s mum comments that one of these kids is going to have a nasty accident. Hey presto, about 5 minutes later they do - child runs into the corner of a table. Screams the place down.

Eventually the staff told them to leave because they were disturbing the other diners.

Stupid, inconsiderate yeast, all of them. No excuses. Just none.