About these parents letting their toddler run riot in a restaurant?

[Cheeseoncrumpets]

I want to start by saying that I have no issue with children being in restaurants, but this really did take the piss IMO.

Went out with a friend to a well known chain restaurant for lunch. Very family friendly and lots of families there as a result. As above I have no problem with that, however one couple who unforunately were sat in the booth right behind us, continually let their toddler run riot.

The restauarnt have high chairs available but they had for whatever reason chosen not to use one and he was sat on the seat next to his parents. He kept getting down and running off, firstly he ran right over to the otherside of the restaurant then towards the serving hatch area where staff are collecting hot food, and finally towards the kitchen doors which suddenly prompted the father to go and retrieve him. They sat him down and kept trying to pacify him with lots of 'no don't do that Charlie' (not his real name), 'would you like to play on Mummy's phone Charlie?'. He then kept trying to climb over the booth, and was at one point standing on the seats. At no point did either parent do much to get him under control other than utter a half arsed 'dont do that Charlie'. A walk outside usually works IME.

Eventually he climbed down and went to sleep on the floor next to their table cuddling a soft toy, meaning staff and customers had to either step over him or walk around him. Both parents sat there and just gazed at him adoringly before paying the bill, scooping him up in their arms and leaving.

I'd like to stress I know this wasnt the little boy's fault. He wasnt any older than about two, was clearly bored and just wanted to go off and explore like toddlers do. Im just a bit shocked that either parent thought this was acceptable parenting?

AIBU to think that some parents are incrediably entitled and expect everyone else to tolerate their kids?

It's you that's looking to argue, MrsNotNice, you want validation for your low-level parenting and have taken over the thread to keep on and on about how you will do this and that and you don't care.

You will care, when your child falls off the table and knocks his teeth out because - why should you stop him? Or when another parent puts you in your place when you do impinge on their time and space.

Do what you like, you're the one who will take the consequences - and so will your child, sadly.

Once was in a chain restaurant in the late afternoon. Not many diners in. A table of four adults and one child sat quite some distance from us. Child screaming and wriggling around. Dad picks her up and carries her right across the the room and sits himself on the floor near our table. Talking to her her in a whiney voice. 'what's wrong what's wrong' Presumably he had moved her because she was disturbing their meal
DH can't stand this sort of thing and the bloke was told to move sharpish. The waitress also told him to move too.
If you have uncontrollable kids don't inflict thier behaviour on people who want a meal free from noise

But even just walking around with an adult behind is dangerous and not appropriate in a restaurant.

You'll still be getting in waiting staffs way. You are still interrupting people who are having conversations. Your child is also very likely to try and reach peoples food.

Take them outside. Take them away from impeding on others space.

No one is suggesting all 2yo will sit still for ages. They are suggesting that their inability to do so should not impact others enjoyment.

It's why I took ds to places with children's play areas (and not necessarily soft play type but actual places they can go and read, chill and play etc). So that there was an appropriate place for him to behave age appropriately.

Last year we went to one such place. They asked if we had children (not their ages!). The staff were perfectly happy to re seat us from the table next to the area to 5/6 tables back when they realised the children were 10 and 11 😭

@MrsNotNice
Yes I would judge - bums do not go on tables, simple as that. It's mucky and totally inappropriate

I saw a mum changing her baby on the table in the M&S cafe. Grim. Especially since she was in a group of people and the perfectly clean and well equipped loos were close.

Our local Wagamamas is great it’s massive and in an l shape and they smilingly but firmly place all the pre school families in the small bit of the “l” so they can drive each other mad. Only chain we go to now

I don’t since the decided to have unisex loos (and yes for that reason)

YADNBU. Just because it's a family friendly restaurant does not mean the parents can let their child roam around unchecked.

I take family friendly to mean much more noisy than a non ff place, but still expect DCs to sit at the table with their parents and if they do want to get up to stay close to the table so as not to disturb other diners or get in the way of the waiters.

I would judge the parents as entitled and inconsiderate of others and no doubt they'll bring up their DC to be the same.

Exactly- family friendly doesn’t mean the whole restaurant is a giant bloody playground. It’s so irresponsible and selfish bringing up children in this way, polluting the world with entitled, precious adults! Just what we need.

Parents think it’s so adorable- maybe to them in a 2 year old hideous in an older child. Unfair too as makes other adults think badly of your child when it’s not really their fault - they just haven’t been taught how to behave.

I used to work in a restaurant. I’ve saw many young children get scalded by coffee or hot plates because the child was wandering around. Don’t let your child wander in a restaurant, it’s dangerous and annoying for staff and other diners. I would never have tolerated kids being able to stand on seats or tables (the latter especially) it’s dangerous, unhygienic and lazy parenting.

If I’m sat in a restaurant and a toddler is hovering near my table with his mother behind him I would not be impressed. That would be distracting and annoying. There’s plenty of places for toddlers to explore but a place where glasses, cutlery, hot plates and drinks are being carried about is not the place or the time.

Half these responses sound like the parents were forced to take Charlie out for dinner regardless of his mood or tiredness. And that's cobblers. If he wasn't up to sitting safely out of the way of hot meals for a bit then get a takeaway/eat at home. We ate out with ours but made it clear it was different to home and different behaviour was necessary. Teaching kids to behave well around others is a basic.

@gnushoes The view expressed earlier was that parents are entitled to downtime and as it takes a village, then if children wander off, the other customers can step in and say "back to mummy, darling".

"And no if my child can only sit in a chair for 10 minutes I WILL NOT deny myself the chance to be in a restaurant "

The entitlement. Get a babysitter ffs.

Waiters or waitresses on low wages should not be expected to run an obstacle course while carrying hot food and drinks. If they suffer a serious burn because food or drink gets knocked is the parent going to inflict the Child Benefit on them in the same way, to replace the lost wages incurred while going to hospital appointments?

HelenaDove
I don’t know what low wages has anything to do with it. If I was a waiter burnt from an incident involving a child I would assume I would be getting paid full stop.

Does that include sick pay if the waiter/waitress needs to attend appointments for burn treatment in work time? You do realize that they wont be able to pick and choose NHS appointment times. And if on SSP no sick pay for three days.

So yes you would obvs still get paid for your shift. But serious burns will need ongoing treatment.

Am i not saying it right?