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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To be furious with this text!

279 replies

Caramelblonde70 · 12/09/2019 22:47

I'll try and keep this as short as possible. I've been dating a guy for nearly 5 months. He is in the process of divorce and has 3DC. I'm divorced and have been on my own with my 4 year old DS for 2.5 years. We've been getting on really well and feelings are developing and we're getting closer too. I decided it was time for him to meet my little boy so we all went out for pizza together at the beginning of the week. I thought it went really well! My son thought new guy was funny and it was lovely to see them getting on. After the lunch we went our separate ways home. 15 minutes later my guy texted to say ffs he'd missed his train home and would be late picking his sons up. I said did he want us to give him a lift home (he lives in a different town about 12 miles away) and he declined. I said I thought the lunch was a success. No reply. After pushing for a response he said he wasn't going to lie but it was hard for him seeing me with my son, that he was very affectionate towards me and he couldn't see there was room for him! He said hes used to just being with me and having all my attention. I was completely shocked at this admission. We've barely spoken since but I raised the subject again this evening and he said a relationship should have balance and basically that's where we differ as he wouldn't necessarily put his kids first and that he'd weigh up all the factors! I said my boy will always come first and he replied saying he didn't like the sound of that and that's what his soon to be ex wife used to say! WTAF?! I'm upset but my anger is out weighing this! What do you all think? Hes 46 btw and a Dad which is why I'm even more shocked.

OP posts:
AlexaAmbidextra · 13/09/2019 17:53

Don’t be furious, be grateful. He’s shown you who he is before you wasted any more time on him. I really would steer clear of men in the process of divorce though. They’re bound to bring problems.

ILikeyourHairyHands · 13/09/2019 17:55

Wow, that was one very lucky escape you've had there. Just block and be done.

NavyBlueHue · 13/09/2019 17:59

Wow! RED FLAG! RED FLAG! Glad you’ve dumped him. He expects you to love him unconditionally and put him above your son!!! You’ve dodged a seriously fucked up bullet there and thank god for your sons sake you did.

DinoroarDinosaur · 13/09/2019 18:02

Awful man. Thank goodness he showed his true colours now rather than further down the line.

DioneTheDiabolist · 13/09/2019 18:39

He said he's a kind and gentle man and prides himself on integrity!
😂😂😂

FlashAHHHH · 13/09/2019 18:53

What a silly fool he is.

Tell him to pack it in, he's just embarrassing himself now. He sounds like a really nasty fucker actually, twisting everything to suit his own agenda.

I'd just tell him to fuck off and block.

OnceUponAMidnightBeery · 13/09/2019 18:56

'Should have been a stain on a wanksock' I'm sorry, this guy is disgusting, but fuck that made me laugh. What an apt description!

Well done OP for running like the wind, if he keeps gaslighting you reread this thread and you'll remember how right you are.

Paddington68 · 13/09/2019 18:56

RUN

Euromillsplz · 13/09/2019 19:04

Boswellisdead

"P.S. Your fragile ego is not my problem. Tatty bye."

He said 'clearly it's too much to ask to be put first for once'.

Well yes, Bob. Yes it is.

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

Euromillsplz · 13/09/2019 19:10

MeetMeInMontauk

I think this thread basically outlines what happens when incels hit middle age.

🤣 so true!

Sorry you met a twat OP, but congrats on disposing of his sorry little bumbum.

PaulHollywoodsSexGut · 13/09/2019 19:30

PLEASE tell us you’ve blocked him and cut his whiny diatribe off in its prime

PaulHollywoodsSexGut · 13/09/2019 19:30

And “whiny diatribe” is not actually a euphemism for penis, honest

Liverbird77 · 13/09/2019 19:33

What a ridiculous man. Your little boy sounds absolutely lovely, saying he liked him etc..he deserves more than this moron in his future.
I also have a ds,, and I can say without hesitation, I would cut contact dead in this situation. I am very sorry and I hope you find a nice guy Flowers

Vanhi · 13/09/2019 20:18

How the bloody hell has he managed through his adult years expecting unconditional position of number one?! Study him for science!

57Lady is probably his mum.

saltpath · 13/09/2019 20:28

Don't worry your son will never remember this knob. You are well rid OP, well done for dumping him! 🙌🏽🙌🏽

Loveislandaddict · 13/09/2019 20:51

What an idiot! Him, not you.

Doesn’t he realise a mum will always put their child first!

Prawnofthepatriarchy · 13/09/2019 20:56

Congratulations, OP. It's disappointing when you'd hoped for more, but when you realised the full horror of this POS you reacted with precision and lightning speed. I'm impressed.

ScruffGin · 13/09/2019 21:00

The unfortunate thing is the poor woman he finds next he'll probably keep quiet and she'll be further into a relationship when she finds out he's a complete wank-badger

Aoibhneas · 13/09/2019 21:02

You dodged a bullet there

pictish · 13/09/2019 21:10

Totally dodged a bullet. Oh my god what an absolute weapon!

BlueJava · 14/09/2019 06:28

I don't think you should be furious - he's shown his true colours quickly enough. Move on, he's not worth your time. Obviously your DC has to come first.

LellyMcKelly · 14/09/2019 07:07

Wow, he sounds unhinged. I think you’ve had a lucky escape there, OP. Well done for binning quickly.

billy1966 · 14/09/2019 08:40

What a prat.

Bet his wife was thrilled to see the back of him.

ThatssomebadhatHarry · 14/09/2019 08:48

He sounds mental. His poor kids.

BuildBuildings · 14/09/2019 08:52

I agree don't be furious be thankful. He's shown you he's a twat and why he's not with his ex wife any more.

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