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AIBU?

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Original poster

an adult woman called my 9 yr old a 'wierdo' waiting outside the girls toilets....

286 replies

staydazzling · 31/08/2019 14:14

he was waiting for me, Sad he said he waiting for his mum, a apparently she didn't respond and walked in, im so proud of ds for sticking up for himself. but im so sad i I wasn't there, to protect him, he was confused when he told me, he is too young to understand the implication, someday he will be that devastates me. yes he is tall for his age, he is nearly 5 ft, but still, he clearly has a childs face, so at a push could be mistaken for 12, apparently she was with her teen daughter. which for some reason makes me feel he would have been more embarrassed. are we really at a point?? where a 4"10 boy, with shaggy hair, wearing a reverse sequin marvel tshirt. cant wait outside public loos for his mum without being labelled a "wierdo" hes not even old enough to understand SadAngry not sure what im asking im just heartbroken, what a world we live in Sad. hes been bery withdrawn and quiet since.

OP posts:
sleepylittlebunnies · 31/08/2019 15:26

I’d think it’s perfectly acceptable for a 9 year old boy to wait outside the women’s toilets, far better than waiting inside the area.

I can’t think what was going through the woman’s mind when she said that to him. I’m sure whatever it was made sense to her. I’d just take the opportunity to explain to him that some people are a bit odd and sometimes come out with odd things.

There’s a chap in my hometown who appears to have Tourette’s and used to walk around town saying piss off quite loudly. Sometimes he appeared to be saying it to people, not sure if he was though. I did explain to my very young children that he wasn’t talking to us, that he didn’t know us and that he couldn’t help blurting things out.

passionfruit11 · 31/08/2019 15:31

Your poor son! I feel for you as I have a 9 year old and if this had happened to him he would be really bothered by it. What a horrible woman

Horatioroses · 31/08/2019 15:31

I'd be very reluctant to let you 6 year old go into the men's alone.

Slaymill · 31/08/2019 15:34

She obviously isn't a thoughtful woman. Why make such a nasty comment. I hope you can do something to cheer up your son.

My son is 10 when he waited for me recently at the loos he had some lovely comments from ladies on how polite he was.

KUGA · 31/08/2019 15:38

The world is full of arseholes.i bet she wouldn't have said anything to an adult man.
Just a typical bully.
And good for your son to say something.
HIGH 5 YOUNG MAN.

elvis86 · 31/08/2019 15:38

I'd be very reluctant to let you 6 year old go into the men's alone.

Why?

What's seriously going to happen with his mother stood at the door waiting?

Honestly - there's being sensible and then there's total paranoia. You'll be raising kids who are scared of their own shadow.

RottnestFerry · 31/08/2019 15:45

I'm not sure what his game has to do with it. I'd wait outside women's toilets for my wife.

If anybody thinks that is weird. Tough.

RottnestFerry · 31/08/2019 15:46

What his age has to do with it.

Bloody iPad

RottnestFerry · 31/08/2019 15:47

I suppose it should be womens' toilets too?

LollyBeebee123 · 31/08/2019 15:52

Awww wee soul! 💙 Tell him to forget all about it and that she’s a weirdo! My 10 year old is also tall for his age but looks still very much like a little boy. I hope she’s ashamed of herself! Witch😡

Hopoindown31 · 31/08/2019 15:59

Part of being a man as far as I can tell nowadays. This is why my DP won't wait outside toilets for me (he waits in an agree location nearby), won't go anywhere near lingerie sections and won't sit next to other people's children.

Rachelover40 · 31/08/2019 16:00

What a dreadful woman to make such a remark to a boy!
She is the weirdo.

Hopoindown31 · 31/08/2019 16:01

Why make such a nasty comment.

Because she feels entitled to do so and knows there will be no comeback for saying it.

HeffaLump1 · 31/08/2019 16:01

Ah poor DS! Some people are just nasty and find pleasure in belittling others Angry hope he is ok x

LagunaBubbles · 31/08/2019 16:08

Thats life these days, you'll get some sympathy as he's 12 but now you know not to expect your husband to wait for you

If you had read it you would have seen he's 9 not 12..and there us no mention of a DH so big assumption there...

DrCoconut · 31/08/2019 16:08

My 8 year old has to come into toilets and changing rooms with me. He is autistic and can't use the men's alone. I'm a lone parent so there is no dad to take him. I try to use disabled facilities but it's not always possible and even then people would probably have a go because he's not immediately visibly disabled (obviously we would let someone who needed the facility more than us use it first). I bet this woman would have a proper day out on us.

missyB1 · 31/08/2019 16:14

Bizarre there must be something wrong with her. The worry is that your little boy may no longer feel safe waiting outside the toilet for you Sad I hope he doesn’t start getting anxious about it.
As for those posters asking exactly where he was standing what does it bloody matter??? No it is not weird for a 9 year old to stand outside the ladies loos! Some people need to get a grip.

gottagetbetter7 · 31/08/2019 16:24

Sorry that your son had this nasty experience, which unfortunately seems more likely to happen these days than in the past. The only positive is it can be a lesson in acquiring resilience and starting to form the tough skin that seems to be a good thing to have in the current hostile environment, but I hope he soon puts it out of his mind as this woman is not worth thinking about.

S1naidSucks · 31/08/2019 16:47

I'm not sure what his game has to do with it. I'd wait outside women's toilets for my wife.

If anybody thinks that is weird. Tough.

I assume you wouldn’t be standing right at the door, though? Would you stand a few feet away?

Btw, I’m not saying that’s what the OP’s son did. It’s a very strange reaction from the woman. I can’t think why any woman would think a young boy standing beside or close to a door is weird. I know he’s nine, but if she thought he was older (@12) and he blocking the door or peeping in to see if you were coming, then I could understand her reaction.

Aprillygirl · 31/08/2019 16:48

I don't think you're overreacting at all OP. I think it's horrible that a grown woman thinks that it's ok to call a child a weirdo-even if your DS WAS 12 that would not be acceptable. I think the reason you're sad is that your child is your innocent wee baby, but it's a reminder that there are some women out there who see all males as potential predators, sexual deviants and/or rapists, which of course is there problem not your DS's, bless him.

Bellatrix14 · 31/08/2019 16:51

It’s a nasty horrible thing to say to a child. I’m not surprised it upset him coming from an adult. I am regularly surprised at how old some of the boys who come in to the women’s toilets with their mums are (I fairly frequently see boys of around 10 or 11) but I would still never say anything to them or their mum! Well done to him for politely standing up for himself.

HeadintheiClouds · 31/08/2019 16:53

I hope I never encounter you barring the way to the women’s toilets, RottNest, if you look as belligerent you sound.
Have you no idea how intimidating it could be for some people? Not me, I’d elbow you out of the way, but really, is there any need?

Blueoasis · 31/08/2019 16:55

She's crazy op. Pay her no mind, just laugh about her to your son.

How can anyone be so nuts that they would think a 9 year old boy is weird for waiting outside toilets for his mum? I'm pretty sure I wouldn't even have noticed him. Some people are just bonkers.

Funguy · 31/08/2019 16:56

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S1naidSucks · 31/08/2019 16:56

some women out there who see all males as potential predators, sexual deviants and/or rapists, which of course is there problem

I think that the fact that over 90% of sex attacks on women is by men, the problem is the men, not the women.

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