11 yo DD & Hotter Shoes

[TheClitterati]

X took DD school shoe shopping. We discussed getting DM,s or Clark's. DD now has a pair of Hotter black school shoes. Aren't they for the over 50's?
Will this potentially ruin dds first year at high school?

WIBU to raise the matter and suggest we return them?

NB: This would also mean I'd have to spend this weekend looking for School shoes.

AIBU?
WWYD?

My 18 & 21 year olds year Adidas shoes like that as casual wear. They look like black leather trainers. The younger one wore them interrailing this summer rather than her Vejas which aren’t as comfortable. How strict is the school? Will she get in trouble for wearing trainers even if they are the opposite of trainers as they’re from Hotter?

My dd is going to secondary for the first time this year. There is a group chat, which parents have kept up from yr6 asking questions on suitability of shoes etc. Some parents are buying Clark’s but they are by far the minority. Most are plumping for Nike, Adidas etc. They’re allowed trainers but not DMs.

I would definitely change those shoes. Your dd is going to be teased and categorised in a bad way unfortunately. She has 5 years ahead of her to be considered the square child. The kickers do look far better.

My dd only recently got into style and what the other kids have when a lot have slowly been finding a taste for sporty styles. She’s going nuts now about what has to be right and wrong. I’m hoping she will settle down about it. I think this also stems from angst. She was not dressed “correctly” for a disco early in yr6.

There’s definitely been a trend for those sort of shoes recently. I don’t like them and I wouldn’t wear them. If she’s confident and likes them and she’s got a good group of friends then I wouldn’t demand she changes them.

Take them back.

I know it shouldn't be a thing and she should be able to wear what she likes etc etc. I agree with all of that. But there's plenty of time for that.

I too got slated for 'wrong' shoes first year high school and it's the only think I remember about that first year.

She doesn't need to know how you feel about the shoes, go with you don't think they fit the proper school criteria and go get your original choice

Hope it all goes well x

I shop in Hotter, I'm 29. My most admired pair of shoes come from there. And they're really comfy. I really don't think you need to take them back if it's a classic style. Depends if they're really ugly I guess.

Let her wear them, she'll soon tell you if she needs a different brand!

I'm in my early 30s and have been wearing Hotter for years. They're so comfortable!

With a swollen ankle and being over 50 then I am probably one of their target audience!.However they have become much more trendy of late !.My friends daughter late 20s Likes them!.I think they have branched out to meet a wider audience ,and If she likes them thats the main thing surely?.As someone who has had ankle problems since the age of 17 , I think she is being sensible to choose a comfortable shoe so she can enjoy school life in comfort!

They're hideous and nobody else will be wearing them. I'm all for promoting kids to stand apart in their style and be confident (when they want to), but the truth is most just want to blend in unobtrusively with their peers (especially when starting secondary with no established friendship network). School shoes are one step down from school bags, and they need to be the 'right one's'. Comfy doesn't feature on preteen/teen radars. Safe yourself the extra money of another shopping trip/meltdown after her 1st day and exchange them beforehand.

I just showed my dd and asked if she’d wear them. She laughed very loudly and said no chance. They might look like school shoes to us but to the keen eye of a young teen they definitely don’t!
www.schuh.co.uk/kids/youth-kickers-tovni-lacer-black-shoes/2402227020/
www.schuh.co.uk/womens/dr-martens-lyric-spin-lace-shoe-patent-black-flat-shoes/1349087040/
These two pairs look virtually identical to each other on the foot but the kickers are £20 cheaper. They both look quite trainer like too.

Op your dd will get teased mercilessly. Please change them. What was your exh thinking?

These were the beauties the cool kids wore at comp in the early 80s. With a donkey jacket (I'm from mining country) in winter or Patrick cagoule in the warmer months. Only thing was I had big feet and the black version were unavailable so ended up looking like a geography teacher wearing the brown version...

Hotter aren’t all granny shoes but those ones are not good. If you can afford Hotter though, you can afford to change them for something much nicer.

I have these for work btw and I’m 39

I was bullied over shoes too, I’d take them back.

I’m a podiatrist who wears hotter Stream for work 🤪

I would change them. They look a bit too grannyish to me, I work with the elderly and I have seen several with those exact shoes.

Dd2 has black Adidas campus type shoes to start secondary in. I know you said she can’t have trainers, but some kickers or DMs would be much better.

There's no way I'd put any child in hotter shoes, they're so frumpy. You're setting her up to be horribly bullied

I am 67 and consider myself too young for Hotter

I'm 26 and I think the hotter shoes are a lot better. The Clarkes are clunky.

Its never too early to learn that comfortable feet are unfeminine and unacceptable Quite.

But more sensibly, are the school rules on shoes very strict? If so, nobody is going to be wearing "young girl shoes" because they won't be allowed to. At ds' school (just left) shoes had to be the sort you'd wear for a wedding. If the rules are very strict I don't think it will matter.

I wear Hotter sandals. I live in them in the summer, they are so comfortable. My mum (80) wouldn't be seen dead in them :)

Are those two pictures of the same shoe? I swear the one on the right is an Ecco Soft II? which I adore, but that's beside the point
I had exactly this issue in my class last year; a girl being mercilessly picked on for having 'old lady shoes'. So unkind, and I went absolutely ape about it.
Just this once, I haven't RTFR, but came on to suggest that, unless you are really struggling financially, would it be possible to pick up an additional pair of shoes? Then she still gets to feel autonomous and to keep the shoes she chose, but she can have something else to test the water with first. I'm one of those who happily buys second hand shoes, and I have just taken delivery of two gorgeous pairs of school shoes which DD1 chose on eBay, a pair of unused Hush Puppies and a pair of Geox which also look like they've never been worn. Including P&P, they've set me back a total of £17, and DD is delighted, assuring me they're bang on trend (and she should know, she's very preoccupied with this sort of thing).

I actually think that they look nice for school. They look so petite, soft and classy. I bet that they are comfortable. They look like a cross between a trainer and ballet pumps. I don't know what hotter is, so i am not biased towards the make. I like them. She likes them so leave her to it.

The hotter shoes are comfortable and are waterproof. One of my DDs chose them over Clark's Y8 onwards. She was fine , but she makes her own confident choices - and had snug comfy feet during the snowy winter, whereas her sister had Clark's brogues which really were rubbish in the wet.

I've got to say, at my school she probably wouldn't be ripped for them but she will be stopped by staff because of the sole; they look like trainers. We are very strict on the no trainer rule and I would have assumed they were trainers until I saw them properly and up close.

And I have to say, I think they are hideous OP; I prefer shoes and boots like you!

Sorry if I'm terribly out of the loop and children have completely changed in the last 25 years, but if I had gone to school in those I would have been mercilessly abused by my classmates and I would have blamed my mother for allowing it to happen. It is your job to protect her from things like this, because you know better.

www.marksandspencer.com/kids-school-shoes-with-freshfeet-13-small-9-large-/p/p60163681?color=BLACK

These are the shoe of choice at my kids school. They last and wear really well. Not so different but less teasing potential. They aren’t allowed trainers but being from M&S school shoe department seems to pacify the teachers

I think you are worrying unnecessarily and projecting
You also have the wrong idea about Hotter, times change op.
they are not for the over 50s purely.