To think the responses to these TripAdvisor reviews are beyond rude!

[SleepyKat]

None of the reviews are mine, I’ve never been to the place. A friend told me about the cafe owner’s responses to any negative reviews and I’m sat here open mouthed reading them. She alludes to reviewers having small penises, stalks their tripadvisor profile to read other reviews and slags off their photos, etc.

Like I said I’ve never been and won’t after reading these as I wouldn’t want to give my money to someone who sounds so —unhinged— nasty. Can’t believe someone who runs a business has so little idea about customer service.

here

Well doesn't she sound like an absolute poppet!

I wouldn't set foot through the door.

Yeahh, not funny at all. Might have been funny if the replies were just to the odd review obviously posted by trolls. But it’s every single poor review. Clear she just can’t take criticism of her business.

I really like her! She has her team's back too. I just get the sense that she gives no fucks.

@SleepyKat I totally agree, sometimes it is really hard to say it’s not good and sometimes you just aren’t asked.

It appears that if someone says something bad when they are in cafe she threatens to call the police

Her responses would certainly put me off visiting. I just want a tasty lunch, not personality and opinions served with it!

And certainly after reading these responses I wouldn’t dare complain in person as I’d be worried that she would kick off. She sounds a nasty piece of work.

Makes me laugh that she called it the Fat Seagull. Like an east coast/mablethorpe version of The Fat Duck.

I’m having a proper read now and these are golden!

It sounds like she thinks she’s hilarious but she’s not, she’s really not. It’s embarrassing for her.

I've read through and she seems like someone with a sense of humour and I especially love the imaginative job titles she gives herself.
"Catherine H, Head Cheesecake sampler at Fat Seagull, responded to this review"

In fact I'm rather suspicious that the Op is Catherine H who is using this as a back door advert.

Kicking off would be the least of my bothers.
I’d worry about them......Well I won’t say it incase anyone’s eating or drinking, but. I’m sure you get my meaning

Check out the Facebook page. Seems she’s a bit famous, radio interviews and the lot.

I can imagine her frog marching customers out, ramming fish into vegetarians' mouths and making every diner boo and hiss at anyone who dared to make a complaint in person.

Properly laughed at some of her replies. I think she’s brilliant! Only negative is now I’m hungry

Oh she thinks she's so witty. I feel embarrassed for her.

She's definitely a mumsnetter.

Some of her replies are mildly amusing but mostly just embarrassing and rude. Definitely not a local business I’d want to support.

I do not believe this thread is not anything more than a fab PR opportunity.

There are a few places around that promote and play up their rudeness and “wittiness” toward customers and get social media attention and therefore custom through it. It seems to me that’s what she’s going for.

I think she’s funny. I’d definitely pop by if I was near.

I also think OP is the owner

Ooh sleepyKat I’m only an hour away too! But in that city an hour away so probably not far from you? Probably in the same shire. I’m GF and my sister is veggie (also a MNetter). I’m definitely thinking an East Mids meet up over there is in order!

I can’t work out if this is faked or someone really crazy!

Really, really feel for her staff. If she treats the customers this way, what is she doing to people under her authority?

anyone live near? can you go and report back to us here?

She sounds bloody awful. I wouldn’t set foot in the place - I want a pleasant meal or (clean) cup of tea, not some mad bint who thinks she’s a character. She must be a nightmare to work for:

Ahh the "paul stenson" model of customer service and maeketting

Its a maeketting ploy. And look its working you've started a thread about it.

For what its worth shes shit at it

She appeals to my dry sense of humour, I want to visit

Check out the Facebook page. Seems she’s a bit famous, radio interviews and the lot.

Ah... She's the local wit!
Would that be Grimsby or Skegness local radio?