To be outraged and despairing at the emboldened racist idiocy around us these days?

[daffalicious]

Today I ran to catch my bus which pulled off as I reached the stop.
Annoying but I was then first alone at the stop waiting for the next. By the time the bus arrived there were other people waiting too but I hadn't paid much attention to anyone as I was first in line near the bus stop post (no shelter).
As I stepped onto the bus a white woman grabbed the hood of my raincoat and yanked me backwards saying loudly 'we queue in this country you know'. I turned completely bewildered and did not see any look of sympathy in the faces of few people gathered.
I was so shocked and said 'what are you talking about I was here first. I missed the last bus' I clearly have an English accent. But all faces remained passive and everyone got on the bus. A young black kid at the back gestured for me to get on before him.
And so then I sat on the bus burning with hot tears and lump in my throat. Wondering what on earth has gone wrong with people in this country. Trying to make sense of it and feeling humiliated and disgusted.
The driver had seen but made no comment or gesture of sympathy.
I am a white English woman in 40s. With dark brown hair no tan at all but have absolutely no idea what nationality the woman assumed I was. I'm horrified at seeing first hand what happens in these situations. Once the woman had spoken to me like that it appeared the other people assumed there was just cause. I was being reprimanded for being a rude foreigner and no one had a problem with it.

I am really upset freaked out and disgusted. I keep thinking imagine if my kids had been with me. It was so humiliating. My heart is racing and I feel nauseous just writing all this.
I feel sick for everyone considered a foreigner. I'm angry that some people seem to have returned to attitudes of the 1970s.
I don't know what to do with all this.
What do mumsnet make of it?

Should also add I have posted here because I want to rant and I don't want to tell anyone irl yet and hear them try to suggest reasons why the woman did that. Which is how my mind worked immediately..oh she must have thought I was... eastern European or a gypsy or I don't know what. But no! There's no bloody reason acceptable.

And I keep thinking about the kid who let me in front of him and wonder if he saw what happened and what on earth he thought. And if it wasn't out of the ordinary in his experience. I'm still so shocked.

That's horrible I'm sorry. The other people were probably afraid she'd start on them if they said anything or stood up for you.

Wasn't the whole point of Brexit taking the country back to the 70s? Attitudes were different then. I'm sorry this happened to you. Next time be assertive. People tend to show their true colours on public transport and it's usually not pretty.

That's awful. I am sorry you had such a horrible experience. It's a shame I wasn't there because, now I am an opinionated old bat who says what she thinks (did not have the courage when younger), I would definitely have supported you and had a go at that woman.

I would assume the woman was mentally ill and didn’t like the way you were queuing (and the in this country bit was sarcasm as opposed to a racist comment given that you are white). The other people didn’t react because they’re British. Unless the situation descended into brawl most sane Brits would act like nothing out of the ordinary was happening. Even in the event of a brawl the overwhelming fear of acting like they had been eavesdropping would put a lot of people off.

If I would have witnessed a similar situation I would definitely have spoken up. Or if the woman had seemed dangerous at least spoken to the wronged party.
But that it is the very strange thing about being 'attacked' in public I was confused and humiliated at the moment it happened and then I had no one to complain to. I just had to sit on the bus like anyone else and swallow it.

I’m so sorry OP that this happened to you. The woman is a rude a**hole, simple as that. There is no reason or excuse to treat people like that and definitely not putting her hands on you.

I would be shocked at seeing such behaviour and would feel guilty if I saw such a thing and hadn’t said anything.

I have never encountered something so blatant (American mixed race with brown skin) , but I have had instances at work and with medical professionals in England. It’s even worse when people try to make excuses for them, say you had to have done something, or think you shouldn’t take it seriously because they don’t want to believe such things still happen in this day and age. My husband (White British) worries for me and gets angry about what he has noticed even from his own family and even though he hasn’t voiced it, I can tell he wonders how I stay so calm about it and remain a positive person. It comes down to knowing that it is nothing I can control. I cannot control how people see or view people that look like me. I don’t have a choice in the matter. I can only be myself and I’m not going to change it or give them more power than they think they deserve or already have. They want me to get angry and upset so they can legitimise their actions and I won’t give it to them.

Don’t let that idiot keep anymore space in your head than necessary. She is not deserving.

I’ve been told that too (stepping onto a bus and not seeing the invisible queue) and I’m pretty white. Some people are just gobshites.

I'm sorry this woman assaulted you.

What a nasty woman!!

Rude and bullying certainly but why racist?

Maybe it wasn’t about race if you are white and she is also white, she Just sounds a bat shit to me,

I remember a white adult man saying exactly the same sentence to me waiting for the bus when I was about 11!!!! (I am also white)

I wouldn't worry about it - queuing for buses can be a nightmare. I have been called variety of things by anygry queuers. And I have been told to go back where I came from (white British) which at the time would have been Sainsburys. Not quite sure what you expected from the silent passengers with the 'passive faces'. What should they have done - you weren't threatened and you for a seat.

a white woman grabbed the hood of my raincoat and yanked me backward

So sorry this happened. Sounds like criminal assault to me. You could ask the bus company for CCTV footage and report it to the police. Given the words the woman used, it sounds like a hate crime too.

I just had to sit on the bus like anyone else and swallow it

No you didn't. You could have called her out on her racism.

Erm, your white, she is white, what made you think this had a racist connotations?

You maybe so upset at her misreading your queue positioning, that instead of it being about a bus queue you turn it into the break down in the social fabric of the country?

Contact the bus company and see if they have cctv that shows what she did. MOst buses have cameras on the side of them. Then report to the police. I would as I wouldn’t have anyone assault me, which is just what this woman did

If I would have witnessed a similar situation I would definitely have spoken up

But because it was you, you allowed someone to stop you getting on the bus and waited until a boy at the back allowed you to get on before him?

Why not tell her to get her hands off you and say you were first at the bus stop and therefore you will be getting on first as any queue should be behind you.

It's horrible when someone starts on you with no warning, but don't blame others for not standing up for you when you didn't stand up for yourself.

She was rude but why on earth would you take that to be racist? It's just a phrase. Do you also take offence if people say "it's a free country" and think they're implying you must be from another country that isn't free?

There was a woman like her at post office. I was first in line, but she walked past us all to be served first. She was saying she in a hurry and just want cash for fags and red bull. I mentioned, hello there is a queue and she started to shout, threaten me, kick things. She also was saying stuff about “in England, we.....”. We all froze and did not want to make her worse. So she went first.
I don’t think it was racist. I think it more she rude person and acting violent made us all put her on ignore like she were a toddler.

I think she's an idiot rather than racist, but you were there and heard the undertone. What a cow.

You need to master the art of the "Who the fuck are you" face. It was rude of that woman but a simple death stare and. Fuck off I was here first might be blunt enough.

Not quite the same thing but I'm short, look young for my ages and a petite build and I get this queue jumping shit all the time.

So sorry that happened to you OP x nothing like that has happened to me as I don't look "furrin" but there's an attitude now that's coming to the surface more that I can sense once people do clock it. Know / know of lots of people who have experienced racial or xenophobic abuse since the referendum (although I'm sure it must have been there before, I definitely think I'm noticing it more now because it's happening to people "like me" = EU nationals and that realisation in itself is quite shameful). It's a good reminder to stand up for people when this stuff happens. I feel quite sad for all of us, we should be better than this.