To have not appreciated the responsibility of getting a dog

[FirTree31]

After looking for over a year I found the dog for us last week. She is a five month old hound and beautiful, she walks to my heel, recalls (although struggling with distractions slightly), sits, is loving and affectionate. We have really bonded, and we start training on Friday.

However, I am a lone parent to two boys, one just started school, and I work four days a week (I was on AL all last week and working two days this week). She is still anxious, following me most of the time but is getting more confident every day. I thought I would be able to leave her in the house and have a dog walker in a few times a week, but now, I'm not sure, she's too young to leave and doesn't have that disposition. I didn't appreciate how much I really need someone here to help. My eldest walk her in the morning, and she has the run of the back garden, but I'm worried about winter months when he won't want to because it's dark. Day care will cost me £250 a month, which I cannot afford, walkers will cost £160. I am so upset, I don't know what's best. I want her to be happy, I want to keep her, she was very very wanted.

Can I just ask, how do people juggle this? I don't want us to miss out on yet something else because I'm alone.

Dimples - that is ridiculous!

Congrats on your new addition .

Quick look at the the breed says that it requires an experienced trainer and is not suited to city life. So mirroring previous posters....why?

But you can research the breed and still they not be as expected. I have two Lhasa's. One is very typical of the breed, the other is like some mutant version who has been sent to terrorise me...and yes both full pedigree. My youngest Lhasa is nothing like what it says on google or like our other Lhasa, so you could research away and it still be nothing like it says on the tin.

Ideally, the Bavarian mountain hound should be able to spend several hours each day running and being exercised. Also says it forms strong bonds and suffers separation anxiety.

Literally beggars belief but just in case the OP comes back, here's the breed rescue website:

www.bmhs.org.uk/rescue.html#

I'm shocked at the amount of people who think it's OK and that the dog will 'settle down.'
It's cruel.
Dogs need company, especially a puppy. I don't understand why you thought it was OK to have a dog when the house is empty so often?!
For the dogs sake, take it back so it can have a home with the attention and care it needs and deserves. It would be incredibly selfish to keep it.

You are going to think this is a crazy idea but get an older rescue dog so she has some company. I have had hounds all my adult life and they are much much easier in twos. You dobt become their sole focus and they curl up together during the day.

Tillygetsit what awful advice. Do not get another dog. Jeeze.

Is it your oldest or youngest that has just started school?

An early post stated that one of the boys did a walk in the morning, but then a later post sounded like you just put them into the garden together.

Which is it?

I think that you have made a mistake to take on this particular dog, at this particular time, and with this little preparation.

'Judgy pants' oh come on OP. Had you of even ever googled 'needs of a dog's 'is a dog suitable for me' you would have known you would be in this situation.

People who post asking for help are just normal people, asking for help to rectify a the mistake is a good thing but a responsible person just would not have not likely done this in the first place because they would have researched it and thought about logic and logistics and the welfare of the dog over their desire to own one.

Dogs do not like being left, it is not advisable. If you can't afford the several hundred pounds a month required to look after the dog as it should be ( there is a reason a shelter would not have given you one with your working hours) then the responsible thing to do is to return to dog. Accepting you made a mistake is one thing, accepting the consequences even when you don't like them, is the actual test of character here really.

The whole 'it gets easier on them, we know they hate it but they learn to survive it's attitude about dogs is such a shame, and selfish.

Ok I'm going to be mean here - what exactly did you do in your year of breed research OP - was it checking which breed best matched your interiors?

I was trying to be helpful, but the more I think about the breed you have chosen, the less it makes sense. We checked the internet for characteristics and spoke to other dog owners including the owner of hid mum about their breed before we got rookiepup. As it is , the worst aspect of him is his shetland pony size which we could have predicted m but chose to ignore as he ticked all the other boxes and is calm, loving, non destructive and enjoys a lot of exercise but can thrive on about 1.5 hrs per day and when required can be left for a few hours without any ill effects ( and it's fairly rare he would be on his own for more than an hour or so).

Long term I just can't see this breed of dog being sustainable for you and also it's not right for a breed who needs to roam and have company,and as such it would be much kinder to return to the breeder or to a breed specific rescue now whilst it's still a cute pup that lots of people would want,

I think rookie has a point.

SO MANY people ask me what breed my dog is, because she's pretty to look at, and a convenient size.

I always warn them off. A Patterdale terrier is not one to attempt if you've got no experience of dogs/terriers, and the exercise she needs is insane.

If you get a working breed and attempt to keep it as a pet, you need to realise the extra work that you will need to put in, via getting a dog that's originally bred to be a 'companion dog'. You are often better with a cross/mongrel.

But too many people want the 'look' of a pedigree, without taking into consideration what the dog was originally bred to do. See also huskies...

*versus. Not via. My brain is still asleep, clearly.

@justwonderingifi Yes you don't always get what you say on the tin, but it's better to go by what it says on the tin because most of the time that's what you get.

You don't get a dog that is known for seperation anxiety, requires a lot of exercise and isn't suitable for city life and hope the dog doesn't live up to the breed standard so it can work for you.

I do now want to get a dog and have her sitting in a crate all hours (I work four days a week, not five). I will do a mix of day care and walker.

Under those circumstances you shouldn't have a dog at all. Its not an entitlement - where did you get the idea from that it was? Why do people who work most days etc get a dog? Its selfish. They are not toys that your kids can enjoy in the evenings whilst they are unhappy all day.

@motherheroic I agree. We did lots of research before settling on a Lhasa, as growing up I had German shepherds but I knew my lifestyle wouldn't suit such a big, intelligent dog. As our said, our first is a Lhasa to a T. The pup really isn't anything like the other, and he's also a barker which they aren't normally. He's very loveable and although he doesn't quite sit with what we "expected", we wouldn't change him.

I think you have made a big mistake in getting this dog. The breed is totally wrong for your family set up plus a 5 month puppy needs company not to be left all day. Why did you not get an older rescue dog? A greyhound for instance needs far less exercise, sleeps more and may be able to be left although some suffer from separation anxiety.

I think a dog should not be left all day. I have 2 dogs and the longest they are left is 4 hours and that is not very often.

Anyway, assuming you keep the dog you need to look at ways to have a happy stress free dog. If you work 4 days a week can the dog not go to doggy day care 2 days a week? The other 2 days I would look at someone like a dog walker coming to your house but not just walking the dog but spending time playing with them and just keeping them company.

As others have suggested, look at borrowmydoggy. I know people with dogs that use it and people who "borrow" dogs and they are all more than happy with it. A friend works shifts and she often looks after/walks dogs during the day.

Can you ask around neighbours to see if anyone would like to spend time with your dog? I used to spend time with a neighbour's young dog to help them out. I loved doing it and never expected any money.

Do you have a local facebook group that you could post on? My local facebook group sometimes has posts from people asking if anyone could regularly walk or visit their dog.

Can I ask if your dog had a home and was returned to the breeder? 5 months is quite old for a puppy to go to its first home. If the dog has already had a previous home and then gone back to the breeder it is not surprising that she is a bit unsettled at your. Even if she hasn't it is still a big thing to be away from where she has spent all her life so far in a strange place with strange people and no mum or siblings.

If there is going to be any change you return the pup then you need to do it sooner rather than later to try and minimise the harm and stress caused to your dog.

I do think too that you need to fully think about the future with her and not just now, Dogs are a big tie and any plans you make for you, your children, days out, holidays etc need to factor in the dog.

Your dog will hopefully live for at least 10 years and will need walking at least twice a day every day rain, snow or shine. Your son may be happy to walk the dog now in the summer and the dog is a novelty but in the cold and/or rain? Also as your son gets older will he still want to do it?