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Original poster

Husband brought a woman into our home

835 replies

girlsgonetame · 19/08/2019 09:37

I posted here recently about a friendship my husband has developed with a colleague. He saved her in his phone under a mans name, lied about seeing her, said it was because I was jealous and he didn't want to have to explain himself. I decided he should give me some space for a few days whilst I worked on my issues with trust and jealousy. He came home at the weekend, assured me there was nothing going on and that he loved me, loved our family, didn't want to ruin that. He told me he would maintain a friendship with this woman as they are doing nothing wrong but that he would be more honest with me about it

Fast forward to today. I am supposed to be at work today but after everything that has happened I couldn't face it so have taken the kids to holiday club with the youngest at DHs parents house and booked myself last minute leave so that I could have a day at home with nothing else planned, get some jobs done, have some time actually to myself without DC or H around

He cycled to work this morning so left really early (starts at 8)
Just before 9 a car pulled up and out they both got. She was walking around my house like she owned the place. Was I unreasonable to hit the roof? He says he'd forgotten something that he needed for a meeting this morning and she had offered to drive him as he'd cycled.

She didn't even say anything she just said "I think I'd better go and wait in the car" 

OP posts:
FudgeBrownie2019 · 19/08/2019 09:49

He's a piece of shit.

Lying about anything when it comes to the opposite sex only ever means one thing; they may not have slept together or reached any kind of pivotal "affair" moment, but the second you need to hide anything like their presence in your phone is the pivotal moment the relationship has begin to form.

Flowers You don't have to do anything right now. Just take some time, process this and get your own feelings in order. This isn't about him or what he wants next; it is solely about what you want to do next. Sleep on it, spend some time with supportive friends and work out your next move regardless of any kind of glossy bullshit he might peddle to make you question if he's really behaved badly or not.

Morgan12 · 19/08/2019 09:49

What did he forget? I'm assuming a large object that he needed help to carry hence her coming in?

Or it's a load of shit and you ruined their morning shag.

What was their reactions like when they seen you?

Summerunderway · 19/08/2019 09:50

Seems like confirmation of ill intent to me...
You buggared up their shaggging...

poolblack · 19/08/2019 09:51

Read this before. This exact scenario.

ginandwine · 19/08/2019 09:51

"I think I better go wait in the car"
And why's that? Doesn't look good.

AudacityOfHope · 19/08/2019 09:52

Ewww he's really a catch isn't he? Waiting till his wife is at work then brings the OW round for a shag in his slept-in sheets.

What a guy. OP, put him out the bloody door! He's got one foot out already anyway.

Takemebacktolondon · 19/08/2019 09:52

This is how many workplace affairs are conducted. Unfortunately he has been caught out this time. How many times has he done this without you coming home unexpectedly? Especially as she was walking around like she owned the place ie been there before.

swingofthings · 19/08/2019 09:52

What did he forget then? Did He say right away what it was or said 'forgotten something' rather than 'forgotten my filofax I urgently needed for my meeting at 11am, look it's here on the table'.

Did she walk to the door with him?

ScruffGin · 19/08/2019 09:52

If he was just nipping in to get something he'd forgotten she'd have stayed in the car anyway. I assume this is "Steve"?

Very dodgy, shame you couldn't have been outside or something until you'd seen what they were up to. I'd be tempted to put a motion sensitive camera at home for a few weeks and see what it picks up...

ginandwine · 19/08/2019 09:52

Because if it was just a quick grabbing of keys or a forgotten item, no way would she of needed to come in as well

Soubriquet · 19/08/2019 09:55

Sounds like she has definitely been there before and they were going to have a quickie whilst you was at work

Mileysmiley · 19/08/2019 09:55

I would go into his wardrobe and cut one leg off all his trousers if I was you ... don't forget to throw the legs away in a distance bin so they are never reunited with the trousers ever again ....

Geppili · 19/08/2019 09:55

Op were you upstairs when they came in?

Billballbaggins · 19/08/2019 09:56

He’s having an affair with her, I’d leave.

goingtotown · 19/08/2019 09:56

She didn’t need to come into the house if he’d just popped back to collect something. Alarm bells OP.

diddl · 19/08/2019 09:58

"He saved her in his phone under a mans name, lied about seeing her,"

Not really any need to read further than that, is there?

Mileysmiley · 19/08/2019 09:59

distant bin

My husband once annoyed me so I went into his wardrobe and carefully cut some of the teeth out of his trouser zip. This did kinda backfire on me because he rings me up from work to tell me that his trouser zip had broken and he had to go to M & S and buy a new pair of trousers because he had to see clients that day. He then tells me he would bring the broken trousers home for me to put a new zip in because he knows how good I am good at sewing.... bugga it! lol

Soulstirring · 19/08/2019 09:59

Her reaction was bizarre also. Did he just leave with her?!

SomeAfternoonDelight · 19/08/2019 10:01

OP you need to get this cheating fucking scumbag out of your life. What a cunt.

desperatesux · 19/08/2019 10:02

How much more evidence do you need. He is playing you for an absolute fool. I mean seriously, he is not even trying to hide it. In your own house, own bed, this is not his first rodeo, usually people work up to that level of betrayal

SignedUpJust4This · 19/08/2019 10:02

OP do you actually need to see the penis go in before you realise what this man is up to?

BrokenLogs · 19/08/2019 10:02

OP, you must know they were there for a shag.

Why would she go in otherwise?

Didntwanttochangemyname · 19/08/2019 10:03

How did he react when he saw you were home? What did he come to collect? Did he actually collect it?

MashedSpud · 19/08/2019 10:05

What was the forgotten item and why did she need to come in?

What was his reaction?

It doesn’t sound good op. Even if it’s completely innocent (which it doesn’t sound like) he’s still brought the woman there’s been drama about to your home.

blackchina · 19/08/2019 10:08

@girlsgonetame It would really help people to help you and advise you if you answered some of the questions people are asking.

What did he come back in for/what had he forgotten?

Why and how did she act like she OWNED the place?

How did he act when he saw you?

How did SHE act when she saw you?