driving someone who says they may become unconscious

[Alwaysannoyingsomeonesmomehow]

Situation is an urgent need to relocate someone and their vehicle that they can't drive, their several children and nine animals, (half are bigger ones) and possessions, from where they are now, to where they 'absolutely have to be on x date' on a very low budget.

They insist they cant fly, or split up animals and people.
Not all animals and children are expected to travel well and all will be packed into tight space. (one animal to be drugged with possible breathing side effects)
The journey they need to undertake is a minimum of 9 hours, easily up to 12.

Physical end of driving isn't an issue. (am experienced long term commercial driver and know my stuff and how to do it.)

Adult has various conditions, mainly undiagnosed, but no question that some very serious stuff seems to be happening to them.

Long history of them apparently losing consciousness and then ending up comatose from hours to days. They're saying it's normal and likely to happen at any point on this journey and all fine, the kids are used to them being unconscious (not asleep) for hours on end.

I and another driver were both originally fine to take (and care for) animals and stuff when people were all flying, but then got 'people now must travel in vehicle too' sprung on us.

We think the normalizing of someone being unconscious (and in front of the children) and being expected to say 'oh well' and carry on if that happens, is dangerous, irresponsible, and beyond acceptable.

But as a result, this (much loved) person will now turn to a non commercial driver who they don't know, who says they'll do it, and place everyone's lives in random hands.

Adult is saying being unconscious for all or part of the journey isn't life threatening, it's just how their life is, welcome to the choices they have to make all the time, and we're making too big a deal out of it. The children are all so used to it all etc. However these are the same children who can't be split from their parent,each other, or animals for the journey because of anxiety.

I get it, and bodily autonomy, but it feels like being made to accept the unacceptable because otherwise the situation may get worse.

We're now second guessing ourselves. I think we're NBU, but are we making to much out of it?

If your hell bent on doing this perhaps a letter of advice or a sort of permit to be with them as it were from the GP concerned?. Or perhaps doctors advice for transport?

Very good of you to help out but it sounds a shade mad!

Unless you have a medical professional travelling with you, you will have to advise them that if they become unconscious, this is a medical emergency as you are not qualified to maintain an airway in an unconscious patient - therefore you will stop & call an ambulance. Any minor children will need to be handed to the authorities as you will not be able to take responsibility for them - I don’t know what you’d do with animals?
You must NOT take the risk of driving an unconscious person without medical support - if their airway becomes compromised & they die (you may not even notice for some time as you will be concentrating on the road) then you will potentially have to explain in court why you did not get medical help as soon as you were aware of them going unconscious ...

Are you getting these people and animals away from a dangerous situation? Is there danger to you in that case?

Passthecherrycoke Yes, and they're their own worst enemy but they're family.

Peachgreen, I'm sorry, and I hesitated to ask, but it is horribly real and I wanted to see if others reacted to it as unthinkable too, because people around them just seem to accept it all.

Funghi apparently a vet!

Laiste it would be early part of the trip, but tbh I hadn't thought about right at the start.

MRex Definitely not trafficking - total car crash lives - have relocated everything except selves, animals and immediate stuff, overstaying temp accommodation with everything spiraling further and further downhill and out of control and running out of money and tolerance. Push pull factors mean have to go now.

I was cynical about the unconsciousness stuff, but they've been in hospital repeatedly, and now have very visible physical signs (that couldn't be put on) that something very amiss is going on.

Don't believe a word of it. I think they are lying to you. No doctor would accept that you could be 'unconscious for days' and be left in charge of children. Being comatose is NOT normal. I'm assuming epilepsy or a neurological thing where their brain is just switching off.

How very irresponsible of them to not be insisting on diagnosis/help/a solution. Imagine on a flight - the person being unconscious, a crew member being alerted and a CHILD saying 'oh it's fine, they are okay'. No one can take a child's word for that stuff.

The drip feed on this is going to fill a bucket!

Keep out of it, OP. If there is no paperwork with a diagnosis and this person collapses and dies, you could be looking at a manslaughter charge if you don't get them help quick and fast. You can't just leave them comatose and carry on driving. Utter madness.

passthecherrycoke no I haven't but other relative has. They where hospitalized apparently in a coma some years back. There is a level of health anxiety, and in the past I've been more on the side of cynicism. Recently there's been a very visible change in their physical appearance that we don't have the power to do to ourselves, ( think ie even with plastic surgery) and I don't know what to think.

tbf DD2 faints regularly, and it can take up to 30-40 minutes for her to be properly conscious if it's a bad faint, and then potentially a couple of hours sleeping/dozing afterwards, so that side of things doesn't sound to me as outlandish as to most people. But, we usually try to get DD either flat with legs up in the air, or in the recovery position, depending if it looks like she's sprained something or not, so the not being able to be moved part sounds more dodgy.

I’d want to know what the medical diagnosis is, and if a doctor was confirming that this loss of consciousness is really “just part of their life.”

Sounds bizarre to me.

I think you should be calling social services and running away. I would guess this person has massive mental health issues, and the ‘resigned helpless’ difficult thing is just their way of getting exactly what they want without being labelled selfish and controlling. No no no. Dont be an enabler.

Jeezo, this is all bloody bizarre. Why is this person living like this with this supposed health issue? I’d be very concerned at the lack of ability to care for kids and animals.

If you are crossing water, are you also crossing international borders with checks? How would security there react to an unconscious adult?
Impossible decision. I dont envy you needing to make it. Good luck!

You say crossing water - assuming it's a ferry, i doubt very much you'd be allowed to cross with an unconscious passenger? Unless its a small 30 minute car ferry to one of the islands and they can just be "asleep".

Just something to consider.

Otherwsie - my first instinct would be to have nothing to do with it.... but then equally the person, children and animals will be much safer with you than a random.

I'm going to guess it's horses and dogs and crossing to/from Ireland.

On that basis - unconscious person would NOT be allowed to cross or be left in the vehicle.

If something happens with dogs / horses / children on route, are you happy, confident and legally covered to deal with any issues?

Are you 100% certain there will be a responsible adult at the other end?

Change in their physical appearance? . Something g very wrong going on here. Why doesn’t someone step in and fly the children home?
The one with the issues needs specialist attention, I’d imagine, but that journey with the parent possibly comatose sounds horrific for young children

I would be calling social services the RSPCA and some type of housing shelter emergency line. Keep out of it. In fact I'd probably be asking 101 for police advice. Unconscious for days. Nonsense.

9 animals and half of them are big ones? Big like horses/cows/llamas?

I can't see how any airline was ever going to let this person on a plane. What's the receiving adult's part in all this?

Of course you can't agree to do nothing if the adult becomes unconscious. Quite apart from the airway issue, you have no means of knowing whether they've become unconscious due to their condition or for some other reason; if they became seriously ill or even died, you could be in all sorts of trouble if you did nothing,

Can you say to them that unless they will agree to let you transport them and the children safely you will have no choice but to involve social services at both ends of the journey?

Is this a commercial arrangement or a "favour" for a relative.

All this "can't do this, can't do that" - they CAN, they are choosing not to. And you as the driver get a say in what happens too, especially with children/animals and ill people.

Google the arm drop test

Use it on them, prove for once and for all that they are faking, and let the pieces fall where they may.

No one just "goes in and out of a coma" or is unresponsive for days, and if there were a chance it was real, they are shitty for leaving the kids to cope with it.

Social services need to be informed about those children. It sounds like a very dark and scary time for them.

If it is transporting horses to Ireland I’m pretty sure you can’t just rock up to the ferry and drive them on? They’re treated as freight, not passengers.
Why isn’t someone prioritising the people (well, children) instead of worrying about fecking horses? You can’t all travel together.

If push comes to shove and you do end up driving her, could she wear one of those travel pillow collar things to stop her head falling?