To feel uncomfortable telling people I'm pregnant because....

[Beingrllystupid]

It feels like announcing to the entire world that we've had sex?
I'm being utterly ridiculous I know but I don't want to tell my parents because of this, obviously they probably know I'm not a virgin but still

[goodwinter]

Of course the odds are stacked against the relationship. I'm sure OP doesn't need the wisdom of Mumsnet to point that out.

[Standingonceremony]

It always makes me snigger (like a 14 year old boy) when people say they are "trying for a baby" ie they are telling everyone they are having lots of unprotected sex. Snigger. Obviously it's nothing to be embarrassed about but at the same time I feel a little like it's TMI. Completely my issue I know.

It also ends up with the "any luck?" discusion in which you then disclose whether you've had your period or not. Again, logical brain is like "vagina's bleed, get over it" real brain is like "ewwwww! I don't need to know".

When I told my Dad I was pregnant he said "well, I suspose the telly's been rubbish hasn't it?".

[Catsinthecupboard]

Yes, i completely understand.

But it's normal! Remember when you realized that your parents did THAT??

I even felt embarrassed when our dc understood how they got here!

Don't listen to anyone on here about terminations. It's YOUR decision. Nobody else will live in your brain/heart. Babies are wonderful blessings but very hard work.

You're supported no matter your choice. Either way has good and difficult outcomes. But ignore the cackling here. Trust yourself.

Best wishes.

[fandabbyfannyflutters]

These comments are awful

It's nothing to do with anyone other than OP and her partner whether they have the baby and what anyone else thinks is totally irrelevant

[Catsinthecupboard]

To all the "wise and old" women here:

I know that I'm old and experienced, but I don't think that I am brave enough to tell all and sundry that I am "wise."

That's a little arrogant.

[LaurenNicolle159]

Whenever someone has told me they’re expecting, I’ve never ever thought about the “how” and have just been thrilled for them at the prospect of having a child. I think you’re overthinking this one - they’re going to find out!! Regardless of how long you’ve been with DP, or your age; you’ve made the decision to have this baby so don’t dwell on something you feel awkward about - people know how babies are made!!

[Rainbow]

@Beingrllystupid I felt the same. I'd only been in a relationship 4 months when I got pregnant with DS1 and I was only 19.

@zeezee3 relationships can fall apart at any time, whether you got pregnant within months, years or not at all. I married my DSs father but it didnt fall apart until 11 years and 3 children later.

[Dragongirl10]

Frankly op, telling people you are pregnant should be of tiny consequence compared to unexpectedly having a child.

Surely you are thinking about, home, finances, schools, parenting, work comitments, whether your relationship will stand the test of time...etc, etc....
You do need to grow up and shift your focus to the things that matter...telling people you are pregnant and worrying about their reaction is very childish.

[Happymum12345]

Congratulations! Thinking that you’ve had sex is the last thing I would ever think of when someone announces they’re pregnant. I had a very much surprise baby and she’s the best thing that ever happened to me. All the best.

[Angrywife]

I felt exactly the same, it's like announcing to parents "we've done it!!". I'd been living with dh for 5 years and we'd been married for 2 at this point 28 years on and I still find it hard to say "our bed" in front of my mum lol.

I would be embarrassed announcing it after 3 months though!

[64sNewName]

God, it’s depressing how many people are saying they giggle/snigger or feel embarrassed about acknowledging that adults having sex. Do you all live in an episode of Are You Being Served?

I mean, the person who said it’s basically the same as telling people her partner regularly comes inside her - wtaf? Who thinks that way? Nobody, literally nobody, is picturing explicit scenes or thinking about ejaculation when you casually mention trying for a baby. Jesus.

[Summergarden]

Personally those thoughts never crossed my mind, perhaps because I had been married for 3 years and living with him for 10 years. It would have seemed stranger if we weren’t having sex than if we were!

Sorry if it sounds unkind, but I would feel awkward telling people I was pregnant if I’d only been with a guy for 3 months. People will no doubt be thinking it was unplanned and maybe even wondering if it’s the current boyfriend’s baby or the one before him.

Still, having sex is a normal and natural part of being an adult and no need to feel ashamed about it. Even the queen has done it!

[SuckerForYou]

I was absolutely mortified telling my parents I was pregnant at 21 .. It wasn't much easier at 31! Announcing my pregnancy to others was fine, but telling them made my toes curl!

[Raspberrytruffle]

I promise you they won't be thinking oh DD is pregnant she's had sex! They if normal will think I'm going to be a grandparent

[Toomuchtrouble4me]

I was scared to tell my mother that I was expecting 4th child at 44! I knew she’d feel that 44 was too old and would voice her opinion!

[Loki1983]

I don’t know if you’re mature enough for parenthood.

[MisterOnion]

I was in the same situation as you, OP. Pregnant at 22 with someone I’d only been with for 5 months and was filled with dread at the thought of telling my parents, but I did it and they were thrilled.

Please do not listen to those commenting on your relationship. I was with my ex for 5 years, it was thought that we were to be together forever. He left me for someone else, I met DP a little while after and now have two lovely children and couldn’t be happier.

[Purpletigers]

I’d be embarrassed to be pregnant after a three month relationship too.

[Purpletigers]

I do hope it all works out for you both .

[lifeinthedeep]

@zeezee3

So you’re shaming the op for not having an abortion when she doesn’t want to? What is wrong with people. Contraception can fail- get over it.

[ishouldbedoingsomework]

This is the weirdest thread I think I've ever read.
Congratulations OP- ignore any comments on here.
But the having had sex thing being embarrassing or something which other people even think about in relation to you? I'm staggered that so many on here have this attitude. Surely it is a normal part of life isn't it?

[Nettie1964]

Had my first at 23 But was married and been together for 5 years. Are you sure it's the having sex you are worried about. As a parent I would be more worried about you only being together for 3 months. You are v young too. I loved being a young mum my kids are in their 30s now. But I would it be happy of you where my daughter. 3 months isn't v long. But I would hide my feelings suck it up and be v happy to meet my new gc. Sorry hope all goes well x

[Work12]

Omg!! I haven't read the full thread but the comments I have read what the actual fuck you nasty stuck up bitches, get off your high horse. Op yes I felt the same slightly that everyone's knows you had sex a couple of weeks ago and when people say they are pregnant I also can't help but think they have just had sex I actually imagine it :o. Don't listen to the nasty comments of are you mature enough for parenthood, I hope you feel good about yourself and guess what I was pregnant after 3 months when I was 21 and it was a planned baby shock horror what silly naive idiots, oh and then we also went on to have a surprise baby, oh and then we went on to be married, oh and guess what we have also been together for over 10 years now. So yes we are doing great! We are mature, have a nice family, both work hard, not massively rich and that's the only thing I'd change, as in saving more before children but honestly screw the judgemental high horse shameful mothers on here!

[64sNewName]

I’d never judge anyone for having a baby at a young age, or unplanned. Life happens, it’s fine. Plenty of young people are super competent and emotionally strong. Plenty of older parents are hopeless.

But those of you who are supposedly adults, and still haven’t gotten past the stage of thinking omg they’ve had sex on hearing about a pregnancy? Yeah, I am comfortable judging you.

I’m not saying you’re doing anything morally wrong. Just that you’re childish and slightly creepy.

[JustMe70]

Hahaha, I was married and 29 and remember feeling a bit squiffy about telling my Dad I was pregnant! Still makes me smile all these years later