Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think Sil's present makes her a cheeky f**cker!

228 replies

RandomeUsername · 12/08/2019 12:56

Sil got DH a family photo package present for his birthday. Nice present because we have a young dc. But it's in the city thats near to her and mil and an hour and a half away from us. She also has said to arrange it with her when we go because she wants to be in the photos. AIBU to think that's quite cheeky of her?

OP posts:
Benjispruce · 13/08/2019 23:03

Op you drip fed after. I answered your op. I just think gifts are gifts. If your DH doesn’t want it , don’t do it. Be grateful she wants to have a photo with her brother’s family. I don’t ever expect gifts.

LazyLizzy · 13/08/2019 23:04

PS. It's a very hard sell when you go to view the results.

All mood lighting, edited slideshow with music, sat on a comfy couch.

BellyButton85 · 13/08/2019 23:07

I've often come across 'photo shoots' that are actually free. When you go to view the photos they tend to be pretty bloody good so you end up paying a fortune for them all (especially if you have beautiful children like mine Wink) or they are so pushy you feel guilty for wasting their time with the shoot that you buy them anyway. It was probably free...thats even more of a cheeky fuck present.
And no I'd not bother going for her to be in them, that's just odd. Doesnt she have her own family

Original poster
RandomeUsername · 13/08/2019 23:19

LazyLizzy £2k for photos Shock. So it's just a photoshoot and you get one photo free and it's some sorta scam to pressure you into spending lots on more photos? Have you had experience with this same company?

OP posts:
LazyLizzy · 13/08/2019 23:33

Yes we were bought this as a gift years ago.

It was Venture, they have branches everywhere.

The 8x10 photo we were offered was pretty crap, wasn't a clear face, hair in the way.

But the additional photos we could purchase were fantastic.

That's part of the ploy.

We paid £1k for 4 photos. (10 yrs ago)

Their website now has prices up to £2,500.

The friend who bought the gift (voucher freebie) got a huge discount herself for the introduction.

MrsRedFly · 13/08/2019 23:36

I've experienced Venture photography - got given a voucher for £30 - lovely photo shoot but locked us in room to look at slideshow of our lovely family that cost £££££££!!!

Don't go if you don't want to spend hundreds of pounds!

ReanimatedSGB · 13/08/2019 23:36

Venture are fairly widely known as hard-sell merchants whose sales pitches are.... perhaps 'confusing' is one way to put it.
I think your best bet is to allow your not-fussed H to let this useless voucher expire without using it. Your SIL is an infuriating spoilt cunt, I agree, but you can't keep on and on nagging at your H at how awful his sister is and hope to force him to agree with you. Just minimize your contact with her and don't give in to any of her silly demands.

Couchpotato3 · 13/08/2019 23:43

My understanding of those types of sessions is that you have loads of shots taken (some with her in) and then you choose just a few to have printed. If she wants a photo with her in it, she can pay for it, surely? The cost of the package usually includes at least one finished photo and that will be your choice of photo.

HeadintheiClouds · 14/08/2019 00:01

They locked you in a room, MrsRedFly?! Please tell me you didn’t buy any?

quizqueen · 14/08/2019 00:13

Just don't bother to book an appointment unless your DH is keen to do it- she'll lose the money then and may realise it wasn't that great a present.

MrsRedFly · 14/08/2019 00:20

That's how it felt!

And because the photos are lovely and of your children we did pay! My DM paid for most of it though - and they are still on the wall - this was ten years ago as well when it was £1K for 4 (our contribution was about £200)

If you DO go take someone with money!

HeadintheiClouds · 14/08/2019 00:22

1k for 4!! What size?

MrsRedFly · 14/08/2019 00:27

Erm 9x8 ?? Roughly measures with fingers!! Not too large as I didn't wasn't huge photos staring at me!!
(Don't think my DSis realised what happened when you go to the studio - which is no longer there)

HeadintheiClouds · 14/08/2019 00:40

You’re joking?? The size sounds fine, I wouldn’t great bloody great portraits on the walls either... but you paid £250 each? 😲😲😲

ineedaholidaynow · 14/08/2019 01:06

So everyone who was saying the OP was mean and the gift was a lovely idea, do they still think the same now that it will probably mean OP and her DH will have to fork out at least £1k to have a family photo with SIL in it?

Catsinthecupboard · 14/08/2019 03:04

OP,

My dh has a saying. "Don't look for logic where it does not exist."

You're holding your sil to a standard that isn't in her realm.

I have read much of this thread and your sil seems immature and babied. My bil was treated like your dh's parents treat your sil bc of his personal problems. Personally, I think he is a selfish man but as a mother, I also understand trying to help the child who needs help/is deficient in some way.

I don't think she's as awful as you think. The picture thing is a problem bc it's financially stupid/scam.

There seems to be a power struggle. She's insecure/immature and you're unforgiving and want her to be different. She's not. She's herself. She's not introspective. But you can be different.

We found peace in our marriage with family when we compromised. He makes decisions for his family and me for mine. We each understand our own family dynamics.

Frankly, she seems lonely and left out. No dp. No dc. She seems to need attention.

Ignore the pictures bc it's a scam. But cut her some slack. You've got a better life and she's got mh issues. Be bigger and that will make your dh happier too.
Flowers

Whatamesshaslunch · 14/08/2019 05:58

Oh my!
As a general rule, you’ll get better, cheaper photos with a small independent photography business than with Venture...
I wonder if she even paid. They quite often give the session for free, knowing you’re likely to spend a fortune on prints.

Namechangeforthiscancershit · 14/08/2019 06:34

I can't believe entire are still going

BettysWoo · 14/08/2019 06:34

It's all about her, so not really a gift. Just imagine instead, that she didn't give you a gift, but has asked you to be in HER family photo shoot.

Namechangeforthiscancershit · 14/08/2019 06:34

Entire?
Ugh

Venture. I can't believe Venture are still going.

museumsandgalleries666 · 14/08/2019 07:02

Get the photos done with SiL and MiL and whoever else wants to be in them and enjoy a family day/ lunch together. Then get some more done with just your immediate family as well . That way everyone gets what they want.

ineedaholidaynow · 14/08/2019 07:19

And pay £1k for the privilege Museum, hardly a gift.

Motoko · 14/08/2019 09:44

So everyone who was saying the OP was mean and the gift was a lovely idea, do they still think the same now that it will probably mean OP and her DH will have to fork out at least £1k to have a family photo with SIL in it?

Some might, but others just like to call OPs unreasonable just for the "fun" of it, so even with this information, they'll manage to twist it so OP's still being U.

And then of course, there are the posters who only bother to read the OP's first post, so they'll be coming on, telling OP she's U, that it's a lovely, thoughtful gift, blah, blah, blah, and then either disappear, or a bit later come back with their tails between their legs, and say they hadn't RTFT.

Fucking annoys me.

AnAC12UCOinanOCG · 14/08/2019 10:04

We paid £1k for 4 photos. (10 yrs ago)

This is the reason Venture is still going.

FilledSoda · 14/08/2019 13:21

I knew it would be venture .
I'd just say no but it's up to your dh I suppose . He won't really drop 1k to keep her happy I hope.