To think people have become ‘delicate’?

[LottieLou90]

I’m not sure if it’s just me, but a joke can’t just be a joke anymore. It’s an insult.

I have quite a few friends who can handle a joke, or a constructive criticism. When I grew up, you told it how it is. If they didn’t like it then so be it.

It seems nowadays you can’t really express your emotions, how you feel or how someone has made you feel.

It’s like you have to protect everyone else’s feelings but your own. Don’t get me wrong, I’m a giver and not a taker but my DH broke the camels back today.

Is it just me or does anyone else feel like this too?

Yes, just browse MN and you'll see loads of snowflakes. I don't run into it too much IRL because I have a very small social circle, but some of the posts on MN are bonkers. "My MIL coughed when I said thank you and now I have been crying for 3 hours" or some other bizarre shit. 🙄

Not just you.

The right to be offended is eroding the right to freedom of speech. Don't like what someone is saying? Tell them it's offensive.

No. I just think it depends on who you surround yourself with.

The other way to look at it is people are no longer afraid to take other people's bullshit. Once upon a time people complaining about racism and sexism would have been considered moaning snow flakes.

Sometimes it's people not understanding your humour.

Sometimes people want to be offended and look for things not intended or they are too serious.

Sometimes you haven't thought something through well enough.

The whole hate crime thing being about perception seems to have entered society and people have gone a bit authoritarian with the wokeness and thought policing of each other, which once came from a place of good intentions.

No I don't agree. "Saying it like it is" often is just code for being rude and many jokes are at someone's expense.
I'm a snowflake and happy to be called one and if I have nothing nice or positive to say I keep my mouth shut. They is nothing wrong with being kind.

Oh god, one of THOSE people. Telling it like it is, constructive criticism, it's just a JOKE. Are you really sure you're not just being a knob and blaming other people for being uptight when they point it out because taking a look at the ugly truth of yourself is too much to bear? Sure?

Oh definitely, supposedly for our MH we should ‘talk’ but then everyone is upset we talked!!
My favourite MN moment of late was the OP whose brat DC had flooded her sisters house, bringing down a ceiling and she was ‘sobbing’ in her room because Bil was angry at her DC 🙄🤣🙄

Agree. It's the ones who request a trigger warning on everything. Even when the title describes everything.
If you can't handle seeing that then maybe step away from the inherent.

Internet 😒

Depends on what exactly you are telling them 'like it is' and if they asked for that constructive criticism.
www.facebook.com/watch/?v=1464185510357279

Well it really depends whether or not you’re a dick Op!

It can’t be constructive criticism and a joke can it? Either your intent was to be lighthearted or to give feedback. Or do you do what some people do and say something nasty as “ feedback” and then protest it’s a joke when you can see you’ve gone to far.

Completely agree OP

How did you upset your husband?

If someone told me I was out of order or if something didn’t suit me then fair enough.

I went out shopping with a friend the other day, she tried a dress on which didn’t look good at all. So I told her “not for you” she took this to mean I was calling her fat etc. I’m not one to tell someone it’s ok when it’s not. This is just one example.

I’m all for calling someone out of what they said was unnecessary etc and I expect the same. Seems too many many people are ok to your face and bitch behind your back.

I’m not mean when I express myself, I just say my opinion. So many people are about it these days.

Not more delicate no, they are just more willing to speak up and not listen to people's racist/biggot/chauvinist "jokes" and points of view.

My ex FIL (in his 80s) would start a sentence off with "so in was in the bank today queuing behind a spade..." (spade being black person.) If he was questioned about it he would be all "people are so delicate nowadays...."

I think it depends... I used to have a “friend” who would always say “I’m just being honest” or “I just tell it like it is”, who also had similar friends in her circle. In reality they were very bitter, jealous, nasty young women who only seemed to “tell it like it is” about women who were thinner, more attractive, talented or more successful than them. Their humour involved putting others down, leaving people out etc. Instead of saying hello, you got an “oi, wanker!”. When one friend, who was 36 and hoping to start a family, arrived home to find her bags packed and that she’d been thrown out of her flat for no reason by her partner, was emotional two weeks after her break up she was “told like it is” that she “needed to move the fuck on already”.

Whenever, you’d say your feeling were hurt or you didn’t want to play a part in gossiping and bitching about other women, these “honest” types would say we were over sensitive, couldn’t take a joke etc etc rather than admit their own behaviour was out of line.

If someone asks for my opinion then I will give an honest opinion. But there is giving an opinion when asked then there's just being plain rude.

I think people have largely lost the ability to self sort. The ridiculous amount of threads I here were people cant make a basic daily decision.

"What shall I buy in Aldi" WTF should I know hat you like eating/what your budget is/how much freezer space you have/whether you can cook or like ping meals.

"she looks at me funny, should I take out grievance" FFS, her have a grip.

"The bus driver said good morning, should I phone up the garage, complain because he was clearly flirting with me" really???? just really? Behave.

"someone patted my child on the head, should I make an anonymous report in case he's a paedophile" I cant even be bothered with this level of fuckwittery any more.

@AnneLovesGilbert this amuses me. Only because I’ve told him that I’m not the go to person in his family.

Our DD just had her 7th birthday and our DS is about to have his first birthday.

He told everyone to go through me in terms of presents and what’s happening. I work full time, as many hours as he does and he got offended when I told him that HE could offer opinion presents and parties etc.

We are both parents and should be able to communicate such. But it’s not just about that, when I suggested ideas, they were shot down.

I’m all for calling someone out of what they said was unnecessary etc and I expect the same. Seems too many many people are ok to your face and bitch behind your back.

You didn't call her fat, she imagined you did because you gave an answer to a question?

People baffle me.

Why bother with this mind reader 'friend' ready to pounce on you for imagined things?

Yes. I know someone who has become very delicate and sensitive over the last 5 years. I've known her for many many years,and she was always a very robust and 'take it as it as it comes' type of person. But nowadays,I feel like I'm walking on egg shells around her,as she takes offence at things that ten years ago,would have gone over the top of her head. I blame social media.

Sorry, posted too soon. Meant to say 'I blame social media for encouraging people to make a career out of 'being offended on other peoples' behalf'.

Apologies if I’ve offended anyone, there have been a few examples in my life where I’ve given my honest opinion (meaning if someone doesn’t look great in an outfit, of what they have said was out of line, etc) if you don’t want my opinion, then don’t ask for it.

I’m a giver, not a taker. But I won’t tell someone they look amazing in something if I don’t think they do - but that is my opinion take it or not.

I’m just so sick of people asking for my opinion and it just gets thrown back in my face.

One of my colleagues asked asked me on a night out how she looked. She has lost a bit of weight, looked phenomenal, and I told her so, but her highlighting on her nose looked like she had done a load of lines of coke, so I literally just said, “maybe blend this bit?” It was like her world came crashing down. Told me it wasn’t any of my business etc.

Do I just tell people they look great?!

You have to be sturdy to be my friend. I'm really nice and loving but very strait forward.