To not want oh to wear suit he got married in?

[Maybe2020]

My partner and I have a cousins wedding to go to in September. He wants to wear the suit he got married in!!
I think it’s weird and told him to get a new one, he says in being stupid and it’s just clothes, doesn’t mean anything.
Aibu?

Badcat666

No, they check it's clean, check it fits and tada! Bingo! I can wear it to the "do".

What hackneyed, stereotyping nonsense. My DH went for two fittings for his beautiful wedding suit, he said he felt amazing in it and he looked incredible. He wanted to make just as much effort for the day as me, and why not.

I would understand if he was going to wear it when he married you but I couldn’t get worked up about him wearing it to someone else’s wedding. Suits are different to dresses because they all look pretty similar

Are you willing to pay for the new suit? If you are expecting him to pay for a new one when he’s got one that fits then you are being doubly unreasonable

And OP, while it IS just clothes, I can see why you might find it uncomfortable to be with him wearing his wedding suit. To him (and several other posters) it’s clearly a practicality, saving buying a new suit if he doesn’t wear one often.

But for you (and as some of us have also understood) it holds some sentiment and feels ‘off’. His ex may well have chosen the suit to suit her vision for their wedding and will have felt at her most connected to him while he wore it.

However, it IS only clothes and actually, as others have said, unless it’s a particularly noteworthy suit, it seems daft not to ever wear it again and to spend money on one which, most likely, will look quite similar!

Drip drip drippetty drip

FFS read the first post - OP calls him her partner, not her husband. It was clearly never about HER wedding!

The 2 posts about his willy.... 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 Op I do think your being unreasonable, unless you made him change his entire wardrobe when you got together I don't think you have a leg to stand on

It’s just a suit 🤷🏻‍♀️ Unless he has cum on it from his wedding night can’t see the issue

In a world full of waste why buy new when it’s not needed

Blokes dont have any sentimant about such things, they just think of the money they can save

It was clear to me from the OP that it was the suit he wore to marry his ex.

My dad has worn his suit to every wedding, funeral and graduation he’s ever been too. Including his own. so fo me wearing the same suit again and again is normal. Mind you we just think he’s doing well to still fit it after 50 years!

My ex got remarried in a suit that, from the photos, was either the same suit or practically identical to the one he married me in. I sniggered slightly but it looked OK on both occasions. Suits are not as individual and striking as dresses.. They are grey / navy whatever so no one will know or care.

This reminds me of a friend of mine. Her boyfriend at the time wanted her to buy a new bed as she had slept with her ex in the current one. Absolutely bonkers but he was a controlling arse.

@BossAssBitch

So does your husband go for 2 fittings every time he needs a suit for normal day wear or of he needs a suit for attending someone else wedding/ party?

The OPs partner isn't marrying her, he is attending someone else's wedding and has a suit that he already has in his wardrobe which just happens to be one he wore to his own wedding.

The OP even says in her opening post he says "it's just clothes" so he holds no attachment to it, it's just something to wear.

In fairness we are all second hand if we've had other relationships. With that logic we wouldn't be able to date anybody as we've all been used at some point 😜

It doesn't sound like he wears suits often, or he'd have options. Buying a new suit (which can be expensive) for a single ocassion is a waste of money if you have to wear already.

So on that basis, I think YABU

What exactly is the issue? It won’t mean he’s married to her again. It’s a suit.

I could understand if he was reusing this old suit for YOUR wedding, but for a cousin wedding who really cares?

It's a suit. What a waste to not wear it again because you have some sort of misplaced jealousy. He is no longer with the ex.

The only exception I would give is that if he had some sort of colour schemed waistcoat and tie. Those should be replaced, but the basic jacket and trousers, no.

I'd take it as a positive, I think. In effect he's saying that, to him, there's nothing special about that suit because the fact that the marriage failed shows that there was nothing special about that wedding - therefore he can wear it to other occasions.

My dh has his ex name tattooed on him ! ! As I'm sure there are a few people out there who have the same. It's a suit, it belongs to him, let him wear it. I'd agree with you if he had something that used to be his ex's and he gave it to you to wear !

It’s just a suit 🤷🏻‍♀️ Unless he has cum on it from his wedding night can’t see the issue

Blurgh, I was totally thinking you were overreacting till I read this..... but now the possibility of this is in my head I’m all Icked out about the suit now too!

Just view it as reclaiming the suit and making it about you and him. Updating it with new memories. After he wears it to this wedding, it will no longer just be the suit he got married in, it will be the suit he wore to accompany you.

Tbh op I still have some items of clothing that my abusive ex bought me. I have no emotional attachment to them at all. Got rid of 99% of tje stuff he bought me but kept a couple of items because I like how they look on me. When I wear them now,
I wear them with my lovely DP and have created a whole new set of happy memories wearing these clothes that completely override my ex. They ARE just clothes and you CAN choose how you feel about this.

It's not as if he's marrying you in it.

Where else would he wear it?! Did you have a glass case specially built to display it in?

YABU and childish