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Original poster

To think no couple goes to bed at the same time?

462 replies

themimi · 04/08/2019 22:23

Watching a programme tonight with DH and saw another example of a couple lying in bed at night having a conversation after clearly retiring at the same time. Mentioned to DH that we never ever go to bed at the same time (I'm an early to bed early to rise person and he's the opposite). DH said that no couple does - it's just a plot device to facilitate dialogue. I think I agree and couples who go to bed at same time don't exist. Anyone out there (past honeymoon stage) who does?

OP posts:
Justsocross · 05/08/2019 23:13

30 years married and 5 children we almost always go to bed together!!! Now I’m worried we are weird. Blush we read chat push to dog off the bed together

Ifyouknowyouknow · 05/08/2019 23:14

We both go to bed the same time too

perpendiculartriangle · 05/08/2019 23:20

Most nights we do but sometimes DH stays up a bit later

Manno75 · 05/08/2019 23:25

We do but it’s always 11pm or later. I don’t get people who go to bed at 9pm though. That’s odd to me. I could easily stay up though as I only need about 5/6 hours

zzzzzzzx · 05/08/2019 23:26

Married for 28 years and we always do. We watch tv in bed when we have put our youngest to bed so almost always do.

Naillig222 · 05/08/2019 23:31

We go to bed at the same time unless he’s been on a night shift the night before, he’ll usually stay up later because he’d have slept during the day. Other than that it’s the same time.

cookiechomper · 06/08/2019 08:14

We've been together 3 years and we go to bed at the same time. We don't always fall asleep at the same time though.

ThinkAboutItTomorrow · 06/08/2019 11:13

Yes, still go to bed together and lights out together after20 years
Unless one of us has lots of work to do so has to stay up very late. That's about once a week.

ThinkAboutItTomorrow · 06/08/2019 11:13

Yes, still go to bed together and lights out together after20 years
Unless one of us has lots of work to do so has to stay up very late. That's about once a week.

ThinkAboutItTomorrow · 06/08/2019 11:13

Yes, still go to bed together and lights out together after20 years
Unless one of us has lots of work to do so has to stay up very late. That's about once a week.

starkid · 06/08/2019 20:53

We do, within 20 mins I'd say (sometimes not at the weekend, but definitely work nights). He usually falls asleep before me though as I read for a while.

Jeremybearimybaby · 06/08/2019 20:56

Nah, 16 years here, DH is a lark, and I'm an owl, so we rarely go to bed at the same time. It's fine, we're still married and happy! Grin

LittleOne61 · 06/08/2019 21:18

We went to bed at the same time for years until I fell pregnant and needed much more sleep. I started going to bed much earlier and two years on I've never stopped! I find it much harder to go to sleep than my husband. He falls asleep in seconds whereas I need half an hour.

It was a huge moment when I realised there was no need for me to stay up with him every night though.

WombleishThigh · 06/08/2019 21:19

DH and I don't, but with a previous live-in partner we both went to bed at the same most of the time.

Figgygal · 06/08/2019 21:21

Yes we do every night

Gracie300 · 06/08/2019 21:23

Always here too, unless one of us is ill.

Walkingandwalking · 06/08/2019 21:24

We do. Always. Between 9.30pm and 10pm and we get up together both early for work at 5.30am or 6am.
We have conversation in bed too, like in your programme.
We’ve been together for 9 years, married for 5 years, with two DC. So don’t think we qualify as honeymoon period!
I think your DP is saying “no one does” to normalise it, but if you want it to be different maybe you could discuss it with him. Apparently not going to bed at the same time can be one of the indicators of problems in a relationship.

5BlueHydrangea · 06/08/2019 21:26

Nope! My dh has chronic fatigue syndrome so is usually in bed by 9pm, sometimes sooner. My dd (9) goes to bed later than him! I usually end up pottering around washing up and watching stuff on the iPad. etc once dd is in bed and it's the only time I have the house to myself which is great! Although I do fall asleep downstairs on a fairly regular basis and wake up in the early hours so not great really.
I do think it has an impact on our relationship but we do often chat in the mornings which is Dh's best time of day (not mine!)
And no, the sex doesn't happen much but that's chronic fatigue (CFS) for you...

lazylinguist · 06/08/2019 21:28

Been married 16 years and always go to bed at the same time. If we didn't, whichever of us went to bed first would get woken up by the other one coming to bed, which would be really annoying.

Yubaba · 06/08/2019 21:30

Nope hardly ever, I’m an owl and stay up till midnight most nights, dh is a lark and has to leave for work by 6am so he goes to bed about 9pm, far too early for me.
We’ve been together over 20 years and married for 14.

UbercornsGoggles · 06/08/2019 21:40

Often 2 hours plus between me going to bed and my husband joining me. Not ideal, but he's a night owl and sometime insomniac.

Animum2 · 06/08/2019 21:49

Dh is a night owl and goes to bed around 1am, im usually in bed about 11 but he likes to watch horror movies and he can only do that when I'm asleep

avocadoincident · 06/08/2019 21:51

We always do and if ever anyone asks for couples advice (like on MN threads or hen do games) this is my go to statement.
Always go to bed at the same time.

Subeccoo · 06/08/2019 22:01

Yep, we go to bed together at the same time every night - I let the dogs out whilst dh makes a herbal tea, then we both read in bed, lights off within a few minutes of each other.. I've never thought it odd

Gre8scott · 06/08/2019 22:04

We do except usualy once a week when i need an early night.

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