AIBU to have a problem with a man being short?

[Whateveryoudoordontdo]

This sounds - and is - shallow. I know. But it really does bother me that the man I'm seeing is shorter than me. By about an inch. He's 5'5''. We met online, good chat, been seeing each other IRL for about 6 weeks. I wasn't that keen in the beginning, but he's kind, he likes me, he makes me laugh, sex is good and he accepts my weird living arrangement (sharing house with ex due to kids + finances). And I'm beginning to really like him, but his shortness puts me off! And when I talk to friends they tend to agree that height is a tricky one to compromise on...
So has anyone had similar (shallow) issues with their DP and got over it? Or am I just a really really bad person...

From the abstract for that article

Cues of phenotypic condition should be among those used by women in their choice of mates. One marker of better phenotypic condition is thought to be symmetrical bilateral body and facial features. However, it is not clear whether women use symmetry as the primary cue in assessing the phenotypic quality of potential mates or whether symmetry is correlated with other facial markers affecting physical attractiveness.

I wouldn't mind if he was the same height as me which 5'5" but any short definitely no way

@Predicter she’s not cruel or nasty not to like short men. It’s a preference which everyone is entitled to when choosing a relationship. Calm down!

@Mileysmiley it’s probably not something you’ve had to worry about, is it?

5’5” is tinchy for a man! So I doubt there’s ever been a need for you to rule someone out based on height?

It’s interesting for sure! It seems to be one of the few things people just aren’t allowed to have a preference on without being called all sorts!

So if a man said ‘she’s really great in every other aspect than her looks that she has no control over’ its absolutely vile and this man deserves better than OP

I think the difference is men don't feel they need to explain why they've rejected a woman!
If they think they can do better, they're just NOT interested.

It’s not bloody vile! Stop being so dramatic!

So if a man said ‘she’s really great in every other aspect than her looks that she has no control over’

What? Are you asking if this would be ok? Because, yes it would. 🤷🏻‍♀️

For every person who doesn’t like a small man, there are people like you who do like them. Problem solved!

I did warn OP that she’d attract weirdly over sensitive posters to her thread...

I’m not asking if its ok i’m saying it’s disgusting

You’re saying it’s disgusting for one person not to find another person’s psychical attributes attractive?

So then you’re sexually attracted to literally every man you see, are you? Barring relatives of course!

And their are legions of women over 45 ish who cannot date amybody who isnt a gargoyle with debts addictions or a personality disorder! Men arent going to date any woman if they believe they can do better. Even the short man.

Doing better is subjective but still.

So if a man said ‘she’s really great in every other aspect than her looks that she has no control over’

No, it isn't. Personality can be amazing, but I want to be physically attracted to a man, and I do want a man to find my looks attractive so if he only likes my personality but not my looks he can do one. Not vile at all.

Maybe you can buy him a pair of heels OP

I think that saying 'this is just my preference, sorry I don’t fancy you' is a much more effective/less shallow argument for this particular incident if you stated it BEFORE you started shagging him IMO.

To say 'there’s no point in getting to know you because I know I will never find you attractive' is one thing.

To say 'in spite of the fact you’re pretty great, I can’t get over this one thing you can’t change about yourself' is quite another.

Not finding short people attractive is t actually what’s going on here.

It isn’t very pleasant though to enjoy sleeping with someone and enjoy being around someone but to dump them for one perceived physical flaw. It is a bit shallow come on.

My experience of short boyfriends has been negative. Think, making me walk in the road so they look taller, etc. It's shallow to judge all short men based on that and I know plenty of women who are v happily married to shorter men, but.... It just never worked for me.