Family asking to stay in our home when we are away.

[LoveGigi]

Okay please give me it straight!

AIBU

We are heading off on holiday for 2 weeks on Tuesday and my in laws have kindly agreed to house sit and look after our 2 indoor cats.

About 3 weeks ago one of my SILs messaged me asking if we would mind her, DH and DS could also come to stay whilst we are away. In said msg she also asked if we would like them to come down immediately prior to us leaving so we could all spend some quality time together. This I felt was disingenuous as she hasn’t visited us for 5 years and I think the comment was shoved in there to mask the fact that she is using us.

I seethed for 2 days and replied saying that they could stay whilst we were away but we were too busy to see them before we left. I chose to fester bitterly instead of dealing with the guilt I would feel for saying no.

Then today the other SIL has asked to come and stay whilst we are away it would be her and her three DCs!! That is a total of 9 people staying whilst we are on holiday. I again feel used as they also have not bothered to come and visit in countless years!!

This wing of the family all live within 10 mins of each other and we are miles away in the capitol.

I feel totally resentful as I feel I can’t say no without suffering years of disdain!

I am a working mother of 3 DCs and the effort it takes to pack to get the family out the door for the holiday is enough without the stress of sorting out the house for 9 guests!!

I also am being mega precious about my new bedroom which I’ve only just moved into so I really don’t want anyone staying in my new bed!!!

Go on, am I being chuffing unreasonable??

OP (If you're still reading) as a responsible cat "parent", you should not, under any circumstances, let this happen. You're beloved moggies will be so upset with all the strangers in "their" territory. Plus there's the very great risk that they WILL be let out. With so many people coming and going, it's quite difficult to imagine how they wouldn't slip through a briefly opened door/window, let alone when your house "guests" aren't even concerned for the cat's welfare.
Get their innoculations booked in ASAP then get them in a cattery. Your MIL doesn't sound like she wants the hoards descending on her but, she also doesn't sound like she'd turn them away either.
Do it for the cat's sake if nothing else, please

I really hope the OP updates on how things worked out, maybe when she is safely back from her trip.

I think it is a liberty!! It is not enough notice for you, but here is a suggestion: if you can contact your house insurance company immediately, ask them if you are allowed to have that many people in the house while you are away. They may well say you cannot, or put a premium on your insurance or increase the excess. Either way, it is doubtful whether you will be insured if you do not ask the insurance company.

I would say that they would be happy to cover your parents if they are house sitting and cat sitting, but would your parents like the responsibility of keeping the house in good order because of the extra family.

Monday night looms.
Bags packed ready to go?

@LoveGigi wishing you a lovely restful worry-free holiday.

Voluntary MN House Watch Brigade on stand by, ready to repel any unwanted boarders - No Paseran!!!

100% put a lock on the loft .... we did this on ours as we had the house extended ... and another friend has done the same ... as they often have people house sit when they are away all summer ... your house your rules... you don’t have to justify it to any one ... you sound very considerate and fair so don’t let them make you feel guilty about your private space ...good luck

Ps ... glad you have nice in-laws ... I could trust mine totally too...
Make sure you have a passing chat with your neighbours as they will no doubt tell you if your SIl’s trick there way to stopping over...
But don’t let this spoil your holiday as when all is said and done ...life is just too short

DH's family house-sat and we came back from a long haul flight to dirty bed sheets, ketchup on cabinets and stained cups and cutlery in drawers!

We allowed one of DH's relatives to stay for a few days while we were away. Never again. Some people have no common sense and no respect for other people's property.

LoveGigi please interrupt your holiday to tell us what you did in the end... I am intrigued, did you send the beautifully drafted email somebody posted on here and have they turned up in droves to terrorise your cats?

You back yet, Gigi?
What's the damage?

Does anyone think OP came back and had a nervous breakdown when she assessed the damage?