What is fair here? 🤷‍♀️

[Sundancer77]

I’m a teacher and occasionally babysit in the holidays for big jobs-weddings etc as it’s great money. Months ago, a parent of a child I used to teach contacted me and said the company she works for were looking for a babysitter for 8 hours for a group of 6 children with a provided room at a wedding. The hotel venue is almost an hour away and I’d be driving back past midnight (have a baby dd so am pretty exhausted these days!) so I was quite reluctant and only agreed due to the good pay (pay based on price per child, per hour.
The family transferred the deposit to me (half of the overall pay-€300) and I would receive the further €300 on the night, with extra pay for any extra children or if we ran over (which they said we likely would) so weighing it up, the travel/hassle etc was worth the pay.
Now..a couple of days ago, the Mum who works for the company contacted me and said there had been big family problems, many of the guests had, had to cancel and as a result they’d only been one child to babysit. Also as a result, she said to keep the deposit (well, I’d already spent it!) and on the night wouldn’t receive any pay as working out the deposit they’d already paid, for one child per hour, it’s a good amount and can cover my travel etc.
Aibu to feel pissed off? Obviously it can’t be helped if guests pull out (due to a family illness) but I wouldn’t have taken the job if I was only getting paid the fee of the deposit due to the long drive, late hours etc. I only agreed as the pay was worth it? So what happens now? What’s fair in this situation? Do I have to do it as they paid half the pay on a deposit? If I don’t want to do it (I don’t) do I pay the deposit back??

That’s not the job or the rate agreed. If they cannot pay you the amount that makes the inconvenience of travel worth your while, then return the deposit . I also think you would not be unreasonable to withhold about €50 as you now won’t have any other paid work that night.

The deposit was to reserve your services. If they then are saying they're paying you half then they are not holding up their end of the deal. You would be there no matter how many children. So either they pay you as arranged, or they make alternative arrangements. The cost to you is the same with one child as with 6.
If you want to work for them again it would be worth returning some of the deposit. But you're entitled to all of it I think!

The deposit was surely for you to keep the evening/day free. You did. The job is now not as agreed so you don't have to do it. I'd think you owe them nothing

It’s a tricky one as nothing was written down or signed and I’m grateful this Mum offered it to me, I also really like her Abdul don’t want to put her in trouble with her company. But surely this isn’t right? But would me keeping the deposit and not doing the job be either 🤷‍♀️Doesn’t sound like it 😩

No. The point of the deposit is so that if they cancel you keep it. You don't have to pay it back, and it's not the job you agreed, so you don't have to take the job either if it isn't worth your time. She can't just change it and you have to put up with it, and she can't just 'decide' that the deposit she has already paid is enough. Either advise her you will still take the job but only if paid the agreed fee, or advise her that she has effectively changed and therefore cancelled your agreement and she will have to find somebody else.

She’s put to me that it’s good as I’m basically getting paid three times the amount for just one child (37.50 per hour) again, I realise that’s great pay, but weighing that up, I wouldn’t have agreed as is far away and in the middle of nowhere etc etc.

She can’t take the deposit back anyway. Either they pay more and you do it, or they cancel. Maybe they could meet at paying half the remaining balance rather than full previously agreed amount? To me that’s fair. They can’t tell you to come but not be paid

But they are putting it that I am being paid from the initial €300 and as she’s put it, it’s almost 3 x the amount for just one child (normally would charge €15 per child, per hour) but it’s not really an issue to me as to how many children, it’s the time spent there and the travel 🤷‍♀️ to have six children as opposed to one wasn’t a huge problem as they had a room with tv etc and i’d arranged a movie night with popcorn..in fact, one to entertain can be harder, in some respects 🙄
I don’t know, I feel bad as she kindly offered me this work when she’s known in the past I’ve needed it, so don’t want to be shitty with her, but surely the company she works for has policies on this?
The only other option I thought was to ask a friend if they wanted to do the job and I pay them by hour the average babysitting fee..what a mess!

I’d actually do it. Partly to preserve your reputation and partly in the hope it might lead to more work. If you decline, I’d imagine they’d ask for the deposit back or it might lead to a lot of awkwardness/hassle.
Plus you only have to watch one child rather then 6.

I don’t want to create bad feeling with this Mum, but in terms of extra work, I’m not actually too fussed as she’s generally only had one job a year, if that, coming in and now I have baby and sleeping issues etc, it’s more hassle than it’s worth,
To pay the deposit back means me trying to save the money back from somewhere now as I’ve spent it 🤷‍♀️ Disappointed I’m now not getting the extra most likely €400 odd on agreeing to the job and I’d reserved that date so it is annoying too 🙄

I would tell her that you would not have agreed to the job under these circumstances so they either pay you the agreed fee or find someone else. The deposit was to secure your time for that evening so you don't accept work elsewhere, which you haven't. You're under no obligation to pay the deposit back as they're the ones who have changed the arrangement. So they either suck it up and pay you what they agreed or they don't and someone has to look after their own child for the evening.

I guess it's a lesson for the next job to get everything in writing, even if it's just an email. This client is flat-out wrong, but I'd reply as if she means well but is misinformed.

"Hey Sally, sorry to hear about your troubles, sounds pretty frustrating. The fee agreed covered my time, travel and services for the evening - the actual number of children didn't really factor in. I am still able to make the night for the €600 discussed. Let me know what you'd like to do, Sundancer"

I'd wait to see what she said to that before discussing what to do with the deposit as you didn't agree a cancellation policy up front.

I do it to. But, why not ask if you could stay over in the room ( I’m assuming) you’d be looking after the child in? And take your own child as well. No driving home fro the middle of nowhere in the middle of the night?

That's a difficult one, as not only are you being paid per child, but the rate is also for your time to and from the location, fuel etc,

I think I'd explain that actually, the amount of children being looked after isn't the only consideration, times and costs etc factor into this. Rather than pulling out or doing it for the deposit, can you go back to her with a proposal that she pays you £150 on the day, rather than the other £300? That way you still get some money and you can keep your reputation intact. Especially if she's local to you, bad mouthing you could cost you your income

They are out of order OP. An agreement is an agreement so I think you are well within your rights to be peed off.

But how you proceed is down to you and if this is a genuine mistake it's tough for all parties not just yourself.

Even though they think you are being paid well, you could have turned down any other jobs this weekend because of this promised work. So it's not about if the job you are doing is paid well for what you're doing, it's paid poorly compared to what was promised.

I agree with a previous poster though, I'd suck it up this time but also express why this has been a problem for you and maybe insist on either a proper contract in future or an agreement that what is offered is what is paid.

Also it's not 37.50 per hour, it's less than 30 per hour with the 2 hours of travelling that you wouldn't be making if not for this job and then your travel expenses.

I’m not too fussed about reputation as it’s a small company quite far away with very few jobs and I don’t think she’d bad mouth me. It’s mainly because the job is from her, with anyone else i’d take a harder line.

I would definitely send what Sonders, it is worded just right I think.

It’s not a deposit , it’s a measure of goodwill from them at the time.

You shouldn’t have spent the money and they should have probably paid less up front but hindsight and all that.

Surely you pay back the money and explain it’s not worth the hassle for one child?

It sounds like they paid half of the fee up front rather than a deposit. If they had cancelled the job then you could keep it but it sounds like you were the one dealing on a per child basis. So you have really been hoist by your own petard!
Either do the job, €300 for a days work is still good money. Or refund them the fee minus a portion for inconvenience.
It really sounds like you didn't want to do the job initially and now you don't want to do the job but still keep the money.

Return the E300 and decline the job. I would think you would be cheeky to keep the E300 when you aren't doing the work personally.

Such differing views 🤷‍♀️It’s hard to know what is the fair thing 😩
I don’t want to do the job for that amount and wouldn’t have accepted it for that initially so will have to return the deposit to them then 🙄
Then of course I am leaving them without a sitter. Unless I try to find them a sitter nearby and pay them the hourly rate myself 🤷‍♀️

Is it actually £37.50 per hour when you factor in travel time and costs? And you'd normally charge extra for late night work anyway?

You don't have to return the deposit - as stated, it was basically a holding fee so that you wouldn't take any alternative work, which you haven't. If you feel you should, I'd suggest you limit what you return to half at most.

You don't have to return the deposit- why do you think you should? They messed you around!

Hi @Sundancer77

You didn't negotiate and agree on an amount per child. You negotiated and agreed on an amount for your services for the evening. You are ready & willing to fulfil your side of the agreement. You deserve the full payment. Alternatively they can cancel your services and forgo their deposit.

It was a risk to pay a 50% deposit, but they agreed to it and you accepted and spent the money in good faith.

Do not repay the deposit.

Send a polite email or text to your contact

'Hi mum of child in my class,

I'm sorry to hear that some of the family can't make it anymore. While I appreciate that these things happen and it's no ones fault, I'm unable to change my fee at this late hour. I've reserved the night in my calendar, made travel arrangements and turned down other work. I hope you understand.

I am ready and willing to provide my services for the £600 fee we agreed, so please let me know if the company would like to continue with my services, or cancel them and forgo their deposit.

I hope this doesn't put you in an awkward position with company.

Looking forward to seeing Child soon

From @Sundancer77